Normal Income, Fabulous Decor

  • GWriter

    Posts: 1446

    Oct 05, 2012 11:15 AM GMT
    Sorry if this has been discussed already, but here's my problem...
    I met a nice guy, and we went to his place last night. It is a _beautiful_ apartment with an amazing view of DC, and chocked full of gorgeous furniture and real artwork on the walls. He works for a non-profit (albeit one that is well-funded), but still a normal job. So I'm a bit intimidated.
    I've never figured out these gay men who have incredible apartments and beautiful furnishings, but just ordinary sources of income. What am I missing?
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    Oct 05, 2012 11:25 AM GMT
    Could be as simple as how he spends his money, such as not going to bars. As an example, I don't drink, so when a friend tells me how much he had spent at a bar I am shocked, a beer cost 5 dollars and mixed drinks cost more. A few of those once or twice a week and it adds up quickly.
    A lot of gay men go out a lot, dinners, drinks and the like, money that flows out of their lifestyle budget that will never be seen again. If you spent that money on furnishings, you would see that money on your walls and floors and it would be there daily. It's just a matter of setting priorities in your spending habits.
    Plus, what a person is earning in salary when you meet them does not indicate what they were earning 5-10 years ago, of the stock options they may have cashed in years ago either.
    For me, I'd rather have the art on the walls.
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    Oct 05, 2012 11:33 AM GMT
    Could be lots of things going on. For one thing, perhaps he has a source of money outside his job, inherited or the result of wise investments. Or maybe he benefited from a wealthy husband some time in the past.

    Plus gay men often acquire nice things over a lifetime, item by item for many years, when their income hasn't been going to supporting a wife and raising kids. They earn no more than anyone else, but they have no one else to spend it on but themselves.

    And the money can be channeled to those furnishings you saw, instead of straight-guy toys like steroidal pickups, fishing boats, gun collections, and gawd knows what other macho shit. All the while these bubbas are luxuriating in wood-paneled dens and vegetating in ancient grungy recliners, because they spent all their money on car payments. I think it's called priorities.
  • spacemagic

    Posts: 520

    Oct 05, 2012 11:40 AM GMT
    ART_DECO said
    And the money can be channeled to those furnishings you saw, instead of straight-guy toys like steroidal pickups, fishing boats, gun collections, and gawd knows what other macho shit. All the while these bubbas are luxuriating in wood-paneled dens and vegetating in ancient grungy recliners, because they spent all their money on car payments. I think it's called priorities.


    I didn't realize you knew my dad!
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    Oct 05, 2012 12:01 PM GMT
    Investments, inheritance, theft, man-whoring ... there are many ways that your average Joe can secure additional cash.
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    Oct 05, 2012 12:21 PM GMT
    Some guys are good with Credit....
    Some guys are good with their hands...
    Some of us are good with saving...
    ..I used to put Everything on Lay-Away after i got out of school.. icon_cry.gif

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    Oct 05, 2012 12:22 PM GMT
    credo saidInvestments, inheritance, theft, man-whoring ... there are many ways that your average Joe can secure additional cash.


    with grindr craigslist a4a and countless more i'm not sure how man-whoring is still a legitimate career option icon_eek.gif haha
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    Oct 05, 2012 12:28 PM GMT
    He's probably in the mafia. icon_eek.gif
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    Oct 05, 2012 12:52 PM GMT
    Ask him if he's a member of the Colombian cartel. Seriously, though, there are many people who work for nonprofit organizations who are independently wealthy--and that's the reason why they're able to work for nonprofits and NGOs (i.e., they don't rely on their relatively meager income from private employment). I represent some nonprofit organizations, and I can assure you that not only are some of these people wealthy, but they're also brilliant (not to mention principled and generous).
  • austex85

    Posts: 572

    Oct 05, 2012 1:20 PM GMT
    GWriter saidSorry if this has been discussed already, but here's my problem...
    I met a nice guy, and we went to his place last night. It is a _beautiful_ apartment with an amazing view of DC, and chocked full of gorgeous furniture and real artwork on the walls. He works for a non-profit (albeit one that is well-funded), but still a normal job. So I'm a bit intimidated.
    I've never figured out these gay men who have incredible apartments and beautiful furnishings, but just ordinary sources of income. What am I missing?


    Totes a trust-fund baby
  • allatonce

    Posts: 904

    Oct 05, 2012 1:31 PM GMT
    austex85 said
    GWriter saidSorry if this has been discussed already, but here's my problem...
    I met a nice guy, and we went to his place last night. It is a _beautiful_ apartment with an amazing view of DC, and chocked full of gorgeous furniture and real artwork on the walls. He works for a non-profit (albeit one that is well-funded), but still a normal job. So I'm a bit intimidated.
    I've never figured out these gay men who have incredible apartments and beautiful furnishings, but just ordinary sources of income. What am I missing?


    Totes a trust-fund baby


    Agreed, working for a non-profit reeks of rich family background. In many instances.
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    Oct 05, 2012 1:36 PM GMT
    crushing debt...lots and lots of it. you see a lot of 23 year old "marketing assistants" here driving brand new bmws, going on elaborate vacations, and the like. i used to question it, then i realized that they're just keeping up with the joneses with credit....it'll all catch up eventually.
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    Oct 05, 2012 1:59 PM GMT
    HFG22 saidcrushing debt...lots and lots of it. you see a lot of 23 year old "marketing assistants" here driving brand new bmws, going on elaborate vacations, and the like. i used to question it, then i realized that they're just keeping up with the joneses with credit....it'll all catch up eventually.


    and that's why i drive my college car that i worked and saved up for. definitely not a pantie dropper but if i don't do it for you i certainly don't need my car to be the reason you like me lol
  • camfer

    Posts: 892

    Oct 05, 2012 2:28 PM GMT
    Great furnishings on a budget can also be achieved through second hand stores, yard sales, estate sales, antique stores in small towns, etc. It just takes initiative and imagination. Sometimes you have to fix things up once you get them.
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    Oct 05, 2012 2:33 PM GMT
    Also consignment shops and "going out of business" sales.

    Some, if having to choose, park their assets at the curb and some feather their nests.
  • rnch

    Posts: 11524

    Oct 05, 2012 2:37 PM GMT
    sounds to me, like Willard Romney, this guy is a member of "The Lucky Sperm Club".


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  • AMoonHawk

    Posts: 11406

    Oct 05, 2012 2:55 PM GMT
    Trust fund babies
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    Oct 05, 2012 2:59 PM GMT
    camfer saidGreat furnishings on a budget can also be achieved through second hand stores, yard sales, estate sales, antique stores in small towns, etc. It just takes initiative and imagination. Sometimes you have to fix things up once you get them.


    I'd say at 75% of our apartment consists of things found on the street, made, or salvaged and re-worked. Luckily I'm the one who knows how to use the power tools, and he's the one who has the imagination and can turn trash into art.

    I also work for a non-profit and do not by any means consider myself rich, but I do support myself and don't rely on my family or a trust fund. I've learned to be much more frugal over the years after living from paycheck to paycheck. Some of my friends are actually asking me for financial advice, which I never thought would happen (considering how bad I used to be with money).
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    Oct 05, 2012 3:00 PM GMT
    ...could be he "sub-lets" the apartment.....(i.e. Not his furnishings).
  • HottJoe

    Posts: 21366

    Oct 05, 2012 3:34 PM GMT
    Some people are just really great at finding deals and stretching their dollar. You could always ask him casually how such a modest guy can have such fine tastes. Just make it seem like you're complimenting him.
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    Oct 05, 2012 3:40 PM GMT
    Homes and cars of gay men often look more fabulous than their income.
  • rnch

    Posts: 11524

    Oct 05, 2012 4:03 PM GMT
    jprichva said
    Iceblink saidHomes and cars of gay men often look more fabulous than their income.

    ::sniff sniff: Yes, that is cynicism I smell.....



    or envy icon_question.gif




    icon_lol.gif
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    Oct 05, 2012 4:13 PM GMT
    rnch said
    jprichva said
    Iceblink saidHomes and cars of gay men often look more fabulous than their income.

    ::sniff sniff: Yes, that is cynicism I smell.....



    or envy icon_question.gif




    icon_lol.gif

    Well, it is envy. I don't have those shopping skills to make it work.
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    Oct 05, 2012 4:18 PM GMT
    As the others have said, there are many possibilities. But around here that particular combination usually spells trust fund.
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    Oct 05, 2012 4:20 PM GMT
    If your me, you get nice stuff buy buying it used off things like craigslist etc. I got a new entertainment center a month ago still sold in the store for 1600 bucks for 200. what was wrong with it you say?...... It has some scratches in it so I sanded it down stained and refinished and now I have a 1600 buck ent center for 200 bucks off craigslist. icon_cool.gif Before this I still had my 1994 cheap particleboard/paper fake wood entertainment center. icon_lol.gif