Do we have to say "Thanks"

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Aug 27, 2008 11:10 PM GMT
    It is necessary to say "Thanks" when someone hot lists you? I don't expect it from the hundreds of guys on my hotlist. In fact if it's just obligatory response I'd prefer they didn't. If I see a response in my mail I get excited, usually only to be let down by that one word. I think people should only respond if they find you their type and no one should get offended if they don't.

    Other's thoughts on the matter?
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    Aug 27, 2008 11:13 PM GMT
    I don't think so. If it comes to you actually corresponding for some reason, then I think the hot-listed person should say thanks.
  • TallGWMvballe...

    Posts: 1925

    Aug 27, 2008 11:24 PM GMT
    Hmm. you get an automated Email form RJ telling you when someone hot lists, buddy lists you or simply adds more pix to their profile.

    I think guys are generally afraid to say thanks if they don't find you attractive worrying you will take that as a door to chat with them.

    Of course it would be polite and a good thing to give some recognition to the person who feels you are attractive enough to put you on the list!
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    Aug 27, 2008 11:48 PM GMT
    TallGWMvballer said Of course it would be polite and a good thing to give some recognition to the person who feels you are attractive enough to put you on the list!

    I think it would be polite for them to give some recognition before they go slapping me on their hotlist.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Aug 27, 2008 11:56 PM GMT
    Do we get the opportunity to decline being on someone's hotlist? I know we do on the Buddy list.

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    Aug 28, 2008 1:36 AM GMT
    elemental12 saidIt is necessary to say "Thanks" when someone hot lists you?


    Nope.
  • HndsmKansan

    Posts: 16311

    Aug 28, 2008 1:37 AM GMT
    I'm always appreciative for both, but don't usually thank them... unless it comes up directly.
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    Aug 28, 2008 1:54 AM GMT
    One thing you should consider is my line of thinking. I say thanks, in more than one word, thus initiating a conversation. Generally, I'm open to getting to know anyone and that's how I initiate the conversation. I usually add something brief and cute, but you never know if they're trying to start something up by saying thanks. I can't imagine someone unfriendly would take the time to e-mail you, so you may want to reconsider. icon_idea.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Aug 28, 2008 1:55 AM GMT
    elemental12 saidIt is necessary to say "Thanks" when someone hot lists you? I don't expect it from the hundreds of guys on my hotlist. In fact if it's just obligatory response I'd prefer they didn't. If I see a response in my mail I get excited, usually only to be let down by that one word. I think people should only respond if they find you their type and no one should get offended if they don't.

    Other's thoughts on the matter?


    No. If you want to correspond with a guy, causing an automated message to arrive in his box is NOT the proper way to do it. That's how I see it.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Aug 28, 2008 1:58 AM GMT
    What I find is bizarre is being buddy-listed by a guy who has never sent me a message. Fortunately, it doesn't happen often. But when it does, I simply delete the message. If you can't bother to correspond with me, then you are NOT my buddy.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Aug 28, 2008 1:59 AM GMT
    I don't think it's necessary, but it's a courteous thing to do, don't you thin? They just paid you a compliment after all.
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    Aug 28, 2008 2:02 AM GMT
    SAHEM62896 saidI don't think it's necessary, but it's a courteous thing to do, don't you thin? They just paid you a compliment after all.


    No, they just pushed a button to add you to a list. I add people to a hot list all the time but I don't expect a reaction from anyone.
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    Aug 28, 2008 2:04 AM GMT
    SAHEM62896 saidI don't think it's necessary, but it's a courteous thing to do, don't you thin? They just paid you a compliment after all.


    Ditto. I usually just send a message telling them how excited and flattered I am!
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    Aug 28, 2008 2:08 AM GMT
    If someone goes to the trouble of paying you the compliment, you should go to the trouble of saying "Thank-you." If someone paid you the compliment in person, you wouldn't ignore them... at least I hope you wouldn't!

    It does matter how many people have hot listed you. Last check, I was somewhere in the 1200 range, but I promise I have thanked each and every person who has extended that compliment.

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Aug 28, 2008 2:40 AM GMT
    WOW. I completely agree with Caslon. I'd appreciate it first if someone took the time to chat with me first and ask me if I want to be hotlisted in the first instead of just slapping me on their list.

    What kind of trouble does someone go through by adding anyone to a hotlist? It's really not hard to be added but clearly it's hard for a person to talk to. I find it annoying when people just slap you on the list and then don't even bother chatting. How many of you actually contact the people you hotlist? I'm gonna go out on a limb and say that a vast majority of people don't. I could be wrong and if so I'd like someone to prove me so.

    How is being hotlisted a compliment? It's a little tacky to be honest. You are much better off emailing me and saying "Nice profile/pix" then recklessly adding me to a list that I might not even want to be on in the first place. Everyone that is on my hotlist is someone that I talked to first and then asked if I could add them. It's a courtesy and a compliment and it doesn't cheapen the effect in my opinion.

    I don't like being hotlisted least of all by someone who can't even talk to me so I usually end up asking them to remove me or I'll block them regardless of how hot they are. At least with a buddy list I have the option of declining it. RJ should look into creating a function that gives you option to turn off the hotlist feature since we now have to pay for everything else on this site. That's just my opinion.
  • VinBaltimore

    Posts: 239

    Aug 28, 2008 2:45 AM GMT
    joescorpio1970 said
    SAHEM62896 saidI don't think it's necessary, but it's a courteous thing to do, don't you thin? They just paid you a compliment after all.


    Ditto. I usually just send a message telling them how excited and flattered I am!


    Me too... though it's not like I'm spending gobs and gobs of time on it -- no where NEAR the 1,200 range! icon_lol.gif

    Heck, I even thank the guys that open up their private pictures for me.

    Now you know why Joe and I are from a place called Charm City!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Aug 28, 2008 3:08 AM GMT

    Right, i don't say thankyou if it is a random hotlisting from a total stranger. Although, if the stranger is pleasing to my eye, i'll check his profile out , but I won't respond if he already has hundreds on his Hot List. Gee thanks for finding me and 200 other guys hot.....as if.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Aug 28, 2008 3:27 AM GMT
    I would say thanks, simple as that.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Aug 28, 2008 3:39 AM GMT
    I say thanks when people send me messages. Being hotlisted doesn't deserve a response.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Aug 28, 2008 4:25 AM GMT
    This topic just won't die.

    Buddy List: Requires previous contact and mutual agreement; unsolicited requests require no acknowledgement

    Hot List: No previous contact required; thank-yous are voluntary; akin to a "wink"

    Why do we have to make things so dang complicated? Sheesh.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Aug 28, 2008 4:26 AM GMT
    Caslon6000 saidDo we get the opportunity to decline being on someone's hotlist? I know we do on the Buddy list.



    Can we really decline being on someone's buddy list?

    Someone buddy listed me and RJ administration told me the option was not available but something they were looking into.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Aug 28, 2008 4:59 AM GMT
    Thanks MuchMore. I actually showed up on this guy's list without mutually listing him but noticed my picture has since been removed. Perhaps it was just a technical glitch.
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    Aug 28, 2008 5:07 AM GMT
    Caslon6000 saidDo we get the opportunity to decline being on someone's hotlist? I know we do on the Buddy list.


    I've watched you reply to several forums thinking you are the shit! Dude seriously you are not hot, nor worth anything. Just shut up! The ones that are hot don't claim to be so!
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    Aug 29, 2008 6:02 PM GMT
    jakebenson said
    SAHEM62896 saidI don't think it's necessary, but it's a courteous thing to do, don't you thin? They just paid you a compliment after all.


    No, they just pushed a button to add you to a list. I add people to a hot list all the time but I don't expect a reaction from anyone.


    Even if it is just a click of a button, someone is letting you know that they find you attractive. Who cares about HOW they let you know, the point is that they DID let you know. Is it really going to kill you to take a second out of your life to show some appreciation?
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    Aug 29, 2008 6:23 PM GMT
    SAHEM62896 said
    jakebenson said
    SAHEM62896 saidI don't think it's necessary, but it's a courteous thing to do, don't you thin? They just paid you a compliment after all.


    No, they just pushed a button to add you to a list. I add people to a hot list all the time but I don't expect a reaction from anyone.


    Even if it is just a click of a button, someone is letting you know that they find you attractive. Who cares about HOW they let you know, the point is that they DID let you know. Is it really going to kill you to take a second out of your life to show some appreciation?


    No it won't kill me, but a reply is an open invitation to start conversation, which nearly EVERYTIME starts off and continues on about their attraction towards me no matter how much I try to skew the conversation away from that topic.

    I will talk to people who hot list me only if I find them attractive. It makes sense since the topic they conveyed was exclusively their attraction towards me. So it justifies me not talking to them solely based on my lack of attraction towards them. We're both superficial in this case.

    However, I will respond to messages if they pose some sort of topic other than "I find you attractive," which is about 5% of the messages I receive.

    I do not appreciate you and I took more than a second to let you know that. ;)