Lamest... Breakup... Ever...

  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Oct 08, 2012 6:07 AM GMT
    Well, I only come here to whine. Really it is all I do. When it is good I am living. When it is bad I am whining, so... prepare for my whining.

    Met a pretty cool guy on a dating service. Pretty attractive. Seemed into me. after two days of chatting, he decided to meet me for coffee.

    On our coffee date, we went to coffee (surpirse!). After that, he thought the date would end there, so we proceded to go to wal-mart to beat each other up with light sabers, another coffee shop to harass one of my friends I knew was studying there. Getting bored with that, we went to a local park and chased the ducks. Once the park was closed we met up with one of his friends for a drag show. Those things terrify me. But he was a real nice guy, so he snuck in his pokemon game on his DS. I spent the show cuddled with him playing with his pokemon. After the show, when I dropped him off at his car, we spent about an hour making out in my car. So... EPIC date for date number one.

    Then he spent about the next week telling me he NEVER does that and that he never felt that way. He normally never feels nothing for the guy on the first date, or so he says. But then he cancels on me for the next date... twice...

    I wrangle up another date with him about a week later. It ends up being JUST for coffee... and we end up doing some heavy petting in my car cause he doesn't wanna go to my place, but we can't go home to his. So, date two was nice, but a bit of a late down from date one.

    Date three was pretty straightforward. Meet him for a movie after work, bring him back to my place. Do the deed. He tells me he likes me. I am thinking I am doing well.

    He then spends the next two weeks, between date three and four, texting me good morning and good night and averaging 80ish texts a day. But then... at the one week hash he says he wants to just be friends cause he didn't feel a spark.

    DIDN'T FEEL A SPARK MY ASS. Like really... I felt the spark there. But whatever. Just friends works for me.

    Fast forward another week. He is over at my house eating the Reeses brownies he asked me to make on "event" four (I call it event because we are not dating apparently). He does the cute "behind the back" hugs. An hour later, he is in my bed and naked. So on "event" four we are doing it again. That was a week ago.

    Today he tells me that he doesn't think I can be friends with him because he thinks I will become too attached.
    True, I AM attached. But... he was SOOOOOO nice. And he is good looking. And each time I was around him I felt so safe... Like I could be myself because he chuckled when I said something derpy. Why can't I just be friends?

    I hope he lets me be his friend. He actually was really nice to just hang out with. But I may have messed up that one too... :*-(

    /rant
  • BarettaB80

    Posts: 141

    Oct 08, 2012 6:32 AM GMT
    3q0ilo.jpg
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Oct 08, 2012 9:45 AM GMT
    Well..i guess you made a new friend..
    ...You guys were chasing ducks.. icon_confused.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Oct 08, 2012 11:55 AM GMT
    Yeah. Totally deserved the variant on the meme.

    And hey! Chasing ducks is cool, right? It is what all the cool kids are doing now days.

    But no... no new friend. He made it pretty clear that he thinks I'm just going to try to sleep with him again, despite the fact that he started the sleeping with maneuvers both times. It was on good terms, but he doesn't wanna play online games with me anymore either.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Oct 08, 2012 2:15 PM GMT
    What a derp!

    Got into something similar.

    I'm staying away now. I can do better. So can you.
  • Amira

    Posts: 327

    Oct 08, 2012 2:25 PM GMT
    You deserve better.. It's too bad he doesn't know how to treat a good man. I should school him on a thing or two.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Oct 08, 2012 2:52 PM GMT


    Good heavens, what box of cereal did that man escape from?

    At least you've had a taste of how good it can be, just not with him. He hasn't earned it.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Oct 08, 2012 2:53 PM GMT
    He's playing you like a violin. Next time he calls, tell him you're washing your hair or fucking a guy hotter than him.

    Move on and save your self esteem.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Oct 08, 2012 3:43 PM GMT
    Olandew saidWell, I only come here to whine. Really it is all I do. When it is good I am living. When it is bad I am whining, so... prepare for my whining.

    Met a pretty cool guy on a dating service. Pretty attractive. Seemed into me. after two days of chatting, he decided to meet me for coffee.

    On our coffee date, we went to coffee (surpirse!). After that, he thought the date would end there, so we proceded to go to wal-mart to beat each other up with light sabers, another coffee shop to harass one of my friends I knew was studying there. Getting bored with that, we went to a local park and chased the ducks. Once the park was closed we met up with one of his friends for a drag show. Those things terrify me. But he was a real nice guy, so he snuck in his pokemon game on his DS. I spent the show cuddled with him playing with his pokemon. After the show, when I dropped him off at his car, we spent about an hour making out in my car. So... EPIC date for date number one.

    Then he spent about the next week telling me he NEVER does that and that he never felt that way. He normally never feels nothing for the guy on the first date, or so he says. But then he cancels on me for the next date... twice...

    I wrangle up another date with him about a week later. It ends up being JUST for coffee... and we end up doing some heavy petting in my car cause he doesn't wanna go to my place, but we can't go home to his. So, date two was nice, but a bit of a late down from date one.

    Date three was pretty straightforward. Meet him for a movie after work, bring him back to my place. Do the deed. He tells me he likes me. I am thinking I am doing well.

    He then spends the next two weeks, between date three and four, texting me good morning and good night and averaging 80ish texts a day. But then... at the one week hash he says he wants to just be friends cause he didn't feel a spark.

    DIDN'T FEEL A SPARK MY ASS. Like really... I felt the spark there. But whatever. Just friends works for me.

    Fast forward another week. He is over at my house eating the Reeses brownies he asked me to make on "event" four (I call it event because we are not dating apparently). He does the cute "behind the back" hugs. An hour later, he is in my bed and naked. So on "event" four we are doing it again. That was a week ago.

    Today he tells me that he doesn't think I can be friends with him because he thinks I will become too attached.
    True, I AM attached. But... he was SOOOOOO nice. And he is good looking. And each time I was around him I felt so safe... Like I could be myself because he chuckled when I said something derpy. Why can't I just be friends?

    I hope he lets me be his friend. He actually was really nice to just hang out with. But I may have messed up that one too... :*-(

    /rant


    I wouldn't have slept with him again after he said he didn't see a spark. Also a drag show and pokemon isn't what I would call an ideal first date lol. Like most gay guys he is just a confused child playing games SMH. I feel for you man, but don't put up with his shit anymore even if he comes crawling back for more sexy times. Its better to be single than to deal with that bullshit. There is something definitely off with him. You will find better.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Oct 08, 2012 4:13 PM GMT
    He just seems like a guy who is not in touch with with feelings or he wants to have his cake and eat it as well. It's pretty typical. If he wants to go the friend route, then you cannot do anything physical or sexual with him even a kiss or "hugging from behind."
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Oct 08, 2012 5:42 PM GMT
    Date more than one guy at a time then you won't be so genuinely needy.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Oct 08, 2012 5:46 PM GMT
    Alpha13 saidDate more than one guy at a time then you won't be so genuinely needy.


    LOL terrible advice...

    OP, why do you want to be his friend when it's obvious you want more than that? Don't settle for being friend zoned. Besides, once you get friend zoned it's near impossible to get out of it and into the guy's dating pool again. Cuz, hey, you never know icon_smile.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Oct 08, 2012 6:11 PM GMT
    someday you will find the right one and realize that getting dumped by this guy was the best gift he could've given you. he doesnt deserve to even cross your mind
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Oct 08, 2012 7:01 PM GMT
    k3l3k0 said

    OP, why do you want to be his friend when it's obvious you want more than that? Don't settle for being friend zoned. Besides, once you get friend zoned it's near impossible to get out of it and into the guy's dating pool again. Cuz, hey, you never know icon_smile.gif


    Eh, I thought he was interested is why I allowed myself to get attached. He seemed genuinly interesting as a friend too. And I mean just as a friend.

    Not to mention that I don't feel ill will towards him. Like... I think he just may not be in a place where he wants a relationship and that may have been why he was so recalcitrant to show emotions. We had not had any real deep talks, so I was just fond of him.

    Basically, I thought I was doing okay with friend zone. Then he ousted me from there too. But at least I'm not upset anymore. If he wants to be friends he still has my number and he knows where I work.

    I'm not closing the door on him emotionally. I just am not holding out for it.

    Got a date with an 18 year old tomorrow. Not sure if I should card him or not. ^_^
  • TroyAthlete

    Posts: 4269

    Oct 08, 2012 7:50 PM GMT
    You want more with him, he doesn't. He wants to play the field and keep his options open -- sounds like you are just one of his options.

    Neither of you have done anything wrong. Seems like you should either learn to live with being in that awkward at-his-beck-and-call sometimes friend/ sometimes fuck bud zone OR if you're not okay with that, then cut him off. But you should never make a priority of someone who only makes you an option.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Oct 11, 2012 3:28 AM GMT
    Olandew saidMet a pretty cool guy on a dating service.

    But then he cancels on me for the next date... twice...

    I wrangle up another date with him about a week later. It ends up being JUST for coffee... and we end up doing some heavy petting in my car cause he doesn't wanna go to my place, but we can't go home to his.

    Date three was pretty straightforward. Meet him for a movie after work, bring him back to my place. Do the deed. He tells me he likes me.

    He then spends the next two weeks, between date three and four, texting me good morning and good night and averaging 80ish texts a day. But then... at the one week hash he says he wants to just be friends cause he didn't feel a spark.

    Today he tells me that he doesn't think I can be friends with him because he thinks I will become too attached.

    I hope he lets me be his friend. He actually was really nice to just hang out with. But I may have messed up that one too... :*-(


    You didn't mess up anything!! It sounds like he has a BF and he's playing the "SINGLE" game. You can't go back to his place maybe because they live together or the BF comes by often and he doesn't want to get caught. He's putting up road blocks as your "events" have gotten serious and he wants to keep distance so as not to get more involved with you. He cancels on you and only does things at your place when it's convenient for HIM. He keeps you at arms length, but still wants to enjoy the occasional booty call.

    unknownkarma55 saidHe just seems like a guy who wants to have his cake and eat it as well.

    soulman1969 saidHe's playing you like a violin.
    Move on and save your self esteem.


    You sound like a great guy who is wasting your time and emotions on someone who is unavailable and likes playing mind games!! You deserve a man who will treat you with respect and dignity....one who will appreciate what you have to offer and give back to you in return. Not string you along with the bullshit like this one has already put upon you!! Be strong and put an end to an inevitable painful situation before you become even more invested. I say this as I have been down this road you are now embarking upon....it was a very painful one indeed. icon_cry.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Oct 11, 2012 3:54 AM GMT
    I thought the same thing Leo, he probably has a bf, or at least someone he likes more.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Oct 11, 2012 3:57 AM GMT
    I met two of his brothers. I picked him up from where he lives, which is where his mom lives.

    And talking with other people who know him, cause we went to see his friend perform at the drag show, he was most assuredly single the first time I went out with him.

    But... moved on now. Talking to another guy. JUST talking.

    But thanks for the help guys. It is, as always, appreciated.

    (The jabs and the jokes are also liked. You guys are good for making me laugh at myself too.)
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Oct 11, 2012 4:01 AM GMT
    Olandew saidI met two of his brothers. I picked him up from where he lives, which is where his mom lives.

    And talking with other people who know him, cause we went to see his friend perform at the drag show, he was most assuredly single the first time I went out with him.

    But... moved on now. Talking to another guy. JUST talking.

    But thanks for the help guys. It is, as always, appreciated.

    (The jabs and the jokes are also liked. You guys are good for making me laugh at myself too.)


    Oh so we are allowed to be mean for no reason? Then it's cus you were a class A clinger and gave him too much attention. Some guys like to make someone like them, then completely ditch because they conquered and destroyed already.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Oct 11, 2012 4:05 AM GMT
    Psh... I am a class SSS clinger.

    And yeah. He very well may have gotten his emotional rocks off and decided to abandon ship.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Oct 11, 2012 4:25 AM GMT
    Olandew saidPsh... I am a class SSS clinger.

    And yeah. He very well may have gotten his emotional rocks off and decided to abandon ship.


    If you ever hang out with him again, make him feel self-conscious and tell him that it looks like he's balding, or that he has terrible breath, or nasty stray hairs on his back. He'll come crawling back to you to assure your affection again and confirm his self-esteem. Trust me, it'll work. If not, at least you can get some lulz out of it.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Oct 11, 2012 4:28 AM GMT
    SkittleGangsta said
    Olandew saidPsh... I am a class SSS clinger.

    And yeah. He very well may have gotten his emotional rocks off and decided to abandon ship.


    If you ever hang out with him again, make him feel self-conscious and tell him that it looks like he's balding, or that he has terrible breath, or nasty stray hairs on his back. He'll come crawling back to you to assure your affection again and confirm his self-esteem. Trust me, it'll work. If not, at least you can get some lulz out of it.


    ..or be an adult and move on.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Oct 11, 2012 4:31 AM GMT
    Ariodante said
    SkittleGangsta said
    Olandew saidPsh... I am a class SSS clinger.

    And yeah. He very well may have gotten his emotional rocks off and decided to abandon ship.


    If you ever hang out with him again, make him feel self-conscious and tell him that it looks like he's balding, or that he has terrible breath, or nasty stray hairs on his back. He'll come crawling back to you to assure your affection again and confirm his self-esteem. Trust me, it'll work. If not, at least you can get some lulz out of it.


    ..or be an adult and move on.


    No no no, that advice is too good, it'll never work.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Oct 11, 2012 4:33 AM GMT
    SkittleGangsta said
    No no no, we aren't giving good advice, we are giving bad advice.


    oh...well in that case...


    grab a knife a BLUDGEON HIS FUCKING HEART...then watch the fucker bleed to death in front of you while you simply and succinctly whisper in his ear "this is what you get".
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Oct 11, 2012 4:38 AM GMT
    Ariodante said
    SkittleGangsta said
    No no no, we aren't giving good advice, we are giving bad advice.


    oh...well in that case...


    grab a knife a BLUDGEON HIS FUCKING HEART...then watch the fucker bleed to death in front of you while you simply and succinctly whisper in his ear "this is what you get".


    Then give him a kiss on the cheek.