I am never having people crash on my couch again!!!

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Oct 15, 2012 4:21 PM GMT
    So I had someone who I barely knew ask if she could crash on my couch for a week.....a week at the very most she said. It has been a month and a half! Talking to her in person she doesn't seem to get that I want her to move out of my Apt which is tiny...505 sq feet...So I sent her an email saying for her to get out by Friday...I feel like a bitch
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    Oct 15, 2012 4:21 PM GMT
    Flynn saidSo I had someone who I barely knew ask if she could crash on my couch for a week.....a week at the very most she said. It has been a month and a half! Talking to her in person she doesn't seem to get that I want her to move out of my Apt which is tiny...505 sq feet...So I sent her an email saying for her to get out by Friday...I feel like a bitch


    That's not being a bitch. That's standing up for yourself against a bully.

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    Oct 15, 2012 4:28 PM GMT
    well in the email I did tell her if she is not out by friday I am going to put her stuff on the front porch and lock the door lol
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    Oct 15, 2012 5:20 PM GMT
    She lives on your couch, she's overstayed her welcome by 5 weeks, and you're sending her an email? Don't be a doormat.
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    Oct 15, 2012 5:49 PM GMT
    Women are evil and manipulative.

    Tell her that if she doesn't move out, you're going to turn into a woman for a day. icon_twisted.gif
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    Oct 15, 2012 7:42 PM GMT
    Flynn saidSo I had someone who I barely knew ask if she could crash on my couch for a week.....a week at the very most she said. It has been a month and a half! Talking to her in person she doesn't seem to get that I want her to move out of my Apt which is tiny...505 sq feet...So I sent her an email saying for her to get out by Friday...I feel like a bitch

    You're too kind... sometimes you have to be kinder...to yourself! Tell her she has to move on out by a given date, hopefully within a couple days. If she tries to talk you into her excuses, ignore them, and when she fails to move out, move her out. It's not on you to take on full responsibility for her well being. We all have to take on what we can for ourselves.
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    Oct 15, 2012 7:45 PM GMT
    You barely know her???
    Eeeww! I could just imaginw what that couch smells like....icon_eek.gif
    No i'd rather not. Have it cleaned after you kick her out.
  • camfer

    Posts: 892

    Oct 15, 2012 7:48 PM GMT
    Sell the couch. Buy a loveseat and a club chair. Then no one can sleep there unless it's in your bed!
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    Oct 15, 2012 7:59 PM GMT
    Flynn saidSo I had someone who I barely knew ask if she could crash on my couch for a week....


    Word to wise: nobody moves in with someone for just a week. That is unless they are expecting thousand of dollars by means some lump sum payment and are just waiting for the check to clear. You can't expect someone to have their shit together within a week, even a month. If you're not going to allow the person minimum 3 months to live with you...don't take on the responsibility of offering them a place.

    I was in a similar situation, but the person didn't actually move in though. It just became an everytime we went out, he wanted to crash at my house drunk, under the influence, etc. EVERY SINGLE TIME. This went on nearly every weekend for 5 months. Finally I was like you know what dude, you have a car. you live with your parents. Drive your own damn self home. And if you can't, either stop going out or stop getting so damn inebriated when you go out.

    Flynn saidwell in the email I did tell her if she is not out by friday I am going to put her stuff on the front porch and lock the door lol


    So 5 days notice? I guess that's pretty generous. Normally it's 3 days. But I'm wondering though was she under any impression that you were OK with her staying over? Did you all have this talk before?
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    Oct 15, 2012 8:03 PM GMT
    I agree with the posters above. Because it is your place and you had an understanding that it was only going to be for a week, you should feel perfectly comfortable having "the talk" with her. Here's an easy script:

    "Hey, I want to talk with you about your staying here. I hope the time here has helped you get back on your feet. I can give you some ideas about where to go next, but I'm ready to have my space back. You can stay here until Friday, but not past that."

    You've already been polite and accommodating. You are not helping her by allowing her to stay past her welcome.
  • AMoonHawk

    Posts: 11406

    Oct 15, 2012 8:07 PM GMT
    just tell her she has to start paying rent ... she'll move .. and if she takes you up on it tell her she's cramping your style so it can only be on a week to week basis and then after that, either she won't pay and you kick her out or she pays and you tell her she's cramping your style and she needs to find a new place to live
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    Oct 15, 2012 8:09 PM GMT
    AMoonHawk saidjust tell her she has to start paying rent ... she'll move .. and if she takes you up on it tell her she's cramping your style so it can only be on a week to week basis and then after that, either she won't pay and you kick her out or she pays and you tell her she's cramping your style and she needs to find a new place to live


    I have a feeling Flynn isn't concerned about money. He just wants to get laid again...in the comfort of his own home.
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    Oct 15, 2012 8:11 PM GMT
    Just make sure there isn't a line of blood where she sat. And make her pay for the way the couch smells now afterward.
  • FRE0

    Posts: 4864

    Oct 15, 2012 8:24 PM GMT
    Flynn saidwell in the email I did tell her if she is not out by friday I am going to put her stuff on the front porch and lock the door lol


    That was going a bit far considering that it was the first e-mail. However, that would have been reasonable for the second e-mail.

    Once, many years ago, a neighboring man had to move out of his apartment a few days before moving into his new apartment. I let him crash in the extra bedroom of my condo, but he was there for only a few days and it caused no problems. Before anyone crashes, there should be clear understanding as to what the maximum time will be.
  • unicoman1

    Posts: 822

    Oct 15, 2012 8:26 PM GMT
    You sent her an e-mail...tell her to her face...GOOD BYE! She will get the hint

    ugly_99a.jpg
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    Oct 15, 2012 8:26 PM GMT
    FRE0 said Before anyone crashes, there should be clear understanding as to what the maximum time will be.


    I believe the agreement was one week, but the OP didn't enforce it.
  • HottJoe

    Posts: 21366

    Oct 15, 2012 8:29 PM GMT
    Ariodante saidShe lives on your couch, she's overstayed her welcome by 5 weeks, and you're sending her an email? Don't be a doormat.


    I totally agree. Some people will have no problem walking all over you, if you let them.
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    Oct 15, 2012 8:30 PM GMT
    Flynn saidSo I had someone who I barely knew ask if she could crash on my couch for a week.....a week at the very most she said. It has been a month and a half!

    Wow, how inconsiderate is that! That was nice of you to accommodate her and that's the thanks you get? Unbelievable. You should not feel like a bitch but she should feel terrible for taking advantage of your generosity!
  • HottJoe

    Posts: 21366

    Oct 15, 2012 8:38 PM GMT
    yourname2000 saidProblem solved:

    8091486621_8958fb5c03_c.jpg

    Next! icon_biggrin.gif


    Except that is shitty lock that will only keep honest people honest. Try a deadbolt.icon_wink.gif
  • HottJoe

    Posts: 21366

    Oct 15, 2012 9:00 PM GMT
    yourname2000 said
    HottJoe saidExcept that is shitty lock that will only keep honest people honest. Try a deadbolt.icon_wink.gif

    He's in Arizona.....so if she breaks in, he can shoot her. icon_razz.gif


    True!

    But I work at locksmith shop for my day job--which is where I am now--and I just couldn't resist.icon_smile.gif
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    Oct 15, 2012 9:02 PM GMT
    camfer saidSell the couch. Buy a loveseat and a club chair. Then no one can sleep there unless it's in your bed!

    Genius* Taking note.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Oct 15, 2012 9:21 PM GMT
    Like, ever.
  • monet

    Posts: 1093

    Oct 15, 2012 10:55 PM GMT
    I suggest you not put her stuff out on the porch. If it gets stolen you can be held responsible.

    Also, I suggest you not try to put her out with only a few days notice without first checking with an attorney or the police. It may be illegal to do that in some areas.

    I watch Judge Judy so I know what I am talking about.

  • Medjai

    Posts: 2671

    Oct 15, 2012 11:05 PM GMT
    monet saidI suggest you not put her stuff out on the porch. If it gets stolen you can be held responsible.

    Also, I suggest you not try to put her out with only a few days notice without first checking with an attorney or the police. It may be illegal to do that in some areas.

    I watch Judge Judy so I know what I am talking about.



    There was no rental agreement, so a verbal contract isn't in place. The individual is essentially trespassing. Putting their stuff outside or locking them out is not a breach of contract here...
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Oct 15, 2012 11:06 PM GMT
    monet saidI suggest you not put her stuff out on the porch. If it gets stolen you can be held responsible.

    Also, I suggest you not try to put her out with only a few days notice without first checking with an attorney or the police. It may be illegal to do that in some areas.

    I watch Judge Judy so I know what I am talking about.

    It only counts if you're fucking Judge Judy.