Dating Preferences or it is Dating Profiling .

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    Oct 17, 2012 2:16 PM GMT
    When trying to find a someone to date or have sex with, we sometimes use filters, are these just personal preferences or do we profile people ?

    We have all seen profiles and ads " no fems " " no camps" " no fat " " no asians " " only active "

    Preferences are Profiling ?

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  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Oct 17, 2012 2:38 PM GMT
    Its a preference. You like what you like. I think its wrong for someone to tell you your being "mean" or "racist" for saying what your attracted to.
  • AMoonHawk

    Posts: 11406

    Oct 17, 2012 2:40 PM GMT
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    Oct 17, 2012 3:21 PM GMT
    MA3000 saidIf I am "dating profiling" what's the problem? No fats, no fems, no ugly dudes, scrawny dudes, pasty old men... It's my preference.
    you forgot "no rice no chocolate vgl masc4masc no whites no earthlings only aliens fox only no items final destination"
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    Oct 17, 2012 4:02 PM GMT
    MA3000 saidIf I am "dating profiling" what's the problem? No fats, no fems, no ugly dudes, scrawny dudes, pasty old men... It's my preference.


    There is no problem. It suits you, and tells everyone else you're worth avoiding.

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    Oct 17, 2012 4:04 PM GMT
    meninlove said
    MA3000 saidIf I am "dating profiling" what's the problem? No fats, no fems, no ugly dudes, scrawny dudes, pasty old men... It's my preference.


    There is no problem. It suits you, and tells everyone else you're worth avoiding.



    *Giggles* :3

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  • TannerMasseur

    Posts: 7893

    Oct 17, 2012 4:05 PM GMT
    Preference/profiling are synonymous in my book.
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    Oct 17, 2012 4:15 PM GMT
    MA3000 said
    meninlove said
    MA3000 saidIf I am "dating profiling" what's the problem? No fats, no fems, no ugly dudes, scrawny dudes, pasty old men... It's my preference.


    There is no problem. It suits you, and tells everyone else you're worth avoiding.



    Just as long as the guys avoiding me looks like you. I'm down with that bro.


    ...lol quite frankly the feeling is mutual. Your personality cancels out any attractiveness you might have.

    Regrettably the ones avoiding you are going to be the ones you want. You're nothing new, and I've seen guys like you crash horribly. Here's a suggestion, list what you like rather than what you don't.

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    Oct 17, 2012 4:23 PM GMT
    Dante_101 saidIts a preference. You like what you like. I think its wrong for someone to tell you your being "mean" or "racist" for saying what your attracted to.


    I agree; however, having a preference of any kind is alienating, in at least some capacity or another. Yes, this includes sexual preferences that are not pansexual/bisexual in nature. Of course, the reality is we don't live in an ideal world where anyone could be with anyone simply on the content of one's character (and mind you there would still be preferences even then). That's fine. We shouldn't be smothered with stigma or chastised for simply having desires for they are rarely the negotiators and mostly the dictators.

    I don't think there is anything "wrong" with the idea of having preferences; I think it is the dismissive attitude and disdainful behavior associated often with preference that people dislike. To tersely be told "you're not my type" is never an easy pill to swallow for most; rejection is something that we, as humans, cringe and shudder over. Layer that with prejudice and stereotypes (e.g. no Asians -> No Rice) and you get a lot of anger/confusion/sadness.

    Some might contend "Well, where do you get off saying something like 'No Asian'? What the hell is 'Asian'? Someone from the continent?" If this is the case, they ultimately end up alienating a lot of people-- especially those who say they prefer 'Caucasians' for example. There are many who may not 'look Asian' but belong to the continent likewise there are those who are Caucasian that don't look anything like the ones they're used to seeing.

    Semantics and categorical terms are charged, especially when the nuances can be so great as to offend, but ultimately, it is in my opinion if you can show disinterest in a person romantically without coming off as a bloody tosser, you're gravy baby. icon_cool.gif 'Lest not forget, we're all humans here. It's just some of us are tragic ignoramuses and confuse "honesty" with mean-spirited vice. :/

    When preference becomes a pejorative, it no longer is a prerogative worth having-- unless, you wish to be an ass mite. icon_smile.gif Hold all of yourself responsibly and without prejudice and you should not be vilified-- in theory anyway. icon_cool.gif
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    Oct 17, 2012 4:24 PM GMT
    meninlove said
    MA3000 said
    meninlove said
    MA3000 saidIf I am "dating profiling" what's the problem? No fats, no fems, no ugly dudes, scrawny dudes, pasty old men... It's my preference.


    There is no problem. It suits you, and tells everyone else you're worth avoiding.



    Just as long as the guys avoiding me looks like you. I'm down with that bro.


    ...lol quite frankly the feeling is mutual. Your personality cancels out any attractiveness you might have.

    Regrettably the ones avoiding you are going to be the ones you want. You're nothing new, and I've seen guys like you crash horribly. Here's a suggestion, list what you like rather than what you don't.



    "Hot, Big dick, muscular, masculine, tall"? icon_surprised.gif

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    Oct 17, 2012 4:28 PM GMT
    MA3000 said

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    *Just...Dies*

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  • TheBizMan

    Posts: 4091

    Oct 17, 2012 4:52 PM GMT
    Dante_101 saidIts a preference. You like what you like. I think its wrong for someone to tell you your being "mean" or "racist" for saying what your attracted to.


    I think its ok to like what you like. I think it is absolutely unnecessary to flat out display your racial preferences. Give me on good reason you NEED to tell someone you aren't attracted to white guys
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    Oct 17, 2012 7:41 PM GMT
    TheBizMan said
    Dante_101 saidIts a preference. You like what you like. I think its wrong for someone to tell you your being "mean" or "racist" for saying what your attracted to.


    I think its ok to like what you like. I think it is absolutely unnecessary to flat out display your racial preferences. Give me on good reason you NEED to tell someone you aren't attracted to white guys

    But it is necessary.
    You just read between the lines-- "Racist looking for other racists for sex and Klan rallies"-- and then move on.
  • Bustthewave

    Posts: 98

    Oct 17, 2012 7:57 PM GMT
    Isn't the idea of a preference simply something you prefer? I'm thinking, by definition, if you "prefer" something over something else, it doesn't mean that that "something else" automatically becomes rejected. If that's the case, wouldn't that be profiling?

    I'm never going to go on a date with someone 100+ pounds over weight, which by my definitions above would be profiling. But is it still profiling if the person I fall in love with becomes 100+ pounds over weight, and I continue to love them, and continue the committed relationship?

    Hell if I know where the lines are. But I do think that people who reject automatically based on race, masculinity, and physical proportions (and probably a million other things), should consider the possibility that underneath those "preferences," are actually bits of unfair racism/biases.
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    Oct 17, 2012 8:07 PM GMT
    Bustthewave saidBut I do think that people who reject automatically based on race, masculinity, and physical proportions (and probably a million other things), should consider the possibility that underneath those "preferences," are actually bits of unfair racism/biases.


    Of course it is. For the most part, the people who hold these biases racist attitudes just don't want to admit that they are prejudiced.

    In the meantime you could sing this song
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    Oct 17, 2012 9:07 PM GMT
    TheBizMan said
    Dante_101 saidIts a preference. You like what you like. I think its wrong for someone to tell you your being "mean" or "racist" for saying what your attracted to.


    I think its ok to like what you like. I think it is absolutely unnecessary to flat out display your racial preferences. Give me on good reason you NEED to tell someone you aren't attracted to white guys


    If someone isnt attracted to fat, old, fem, white, black, whatever it may be then not putting that on your profile is wasting not only yours, but people with any of thoes qualities time. Its hard enough to find someone your interested in so I think being straight forward and not beating around the bush would be appreciated.... But thats just my opinion
  • Bustthewave

    Posts: 98

    Oct 17, 2012 9:25 PM GMT
    Macaque said
    Bustthewave saidBut I do think that people who reject automatically based on race, masculinity, and physical proportions (and probably a million other things), should consider the possibility that underneath those "preferences," are actually bits of unfair racism/biases.


    Of course it is. For the most part, the people who hold these biases racist attitudes just don't want to admit that they are prejudiced.

    In the meantime you could sing this song


    *and it was in that moment bustthewave found racism for the first time, absolutely adorable.*

    Sometimes I narrate my own life... ... ... icon_sad.gif ... ... even though I suck at narratives...
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Oct 17, 2012 9:34 PM GMT
    All you guys make value point.

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    Oct 17, 2012 9:56 PM GMT
    Dante_101 said
    TheBizMan said
    Dante_101 saidIts a preference. You like what you like. I think its wrong for someone to tell you your being "mean" or "racist" for saying what your attracted to.


    I think its ok to like what you like. I think it is absolutely unnecessary to flat out display your racial preferences. Give me on good reason you NEED to tell someone you aren't attracted to white guys


    If someone isnt attracted to fat, old, fem, white, black, whatever it may be then not putting that on your profile is wasting not only yours, but people with any of thoes qualities time. Its hard enough to find someone your interested in so I think being straight forward and not beating around the bush would be appreciated.... But thats just my opinion


    OK, Take your pic:

    1 No blacks.

    or

    2 Prefer Asian guys.

    I'll take door #2 as less offensive to black guys AND telling people what is preferred.

  • TheBizMan

    Posts: 4091

    Oct 18, 2012 12:10 AM GMT
    Dante_101 said
    TheBizMan said
    Dante_101 saidIts a preference. You like what you like. I think its wrong for someone to tell you your being "mean" or "racist" for saying what your attracted to.


    I think its ok to like what you like. I think it is absolutely unnecessary to flat out display your racial preferences. Give me on good reason you NEED to tell someone you aren't attracted to white guys


    If someone isnt attracted to fat, old, fem, white, black, whatever it may be then not putting that on your profile is wasting not only yours, but people with any of thoes qualities time. Its hard enough to find someone your interested in so I think being straight forward and not beating around the bush would be appreciated.... But thats just my opinion



    Well I think that's an utter bullshit reason. Truly indecent and totally what people would expect of gays. That;s just my opinion though..
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Oct 18, 2012 12:18 AM GMT
    "Dating profiling" implies that you actually read other people's profiles, which is totally unheard of in internetville.
  • Bustthewave

    Posts: 98

    Oct 18, 2012 12:27 AM GMT
    paulflexes said"Dating profiling" implies that you actually read other people's profiles, which is totally unheard of in internetville.


    Wow... all the things I'm learning in one thread... People don't read profiles?! icon_eek.gif

    And I'm honestly surprised people are upset about profiles saying "not into black... white guys only... exc..." Good surprised, but surprised. It's always bothered me, but in my area (it's the south...) that's most profiles. It seems to be completely normalized. It doesn't even phase me anymore.
  • TheBizMan

    Posts: 4091

    Oct 18, 2012 12:32 AM GMT
    Bustthewave said
    paulflexes said"Dating profiling" implies that you actually read other people's profiles, which is totally unheard of in internetville.


    Wow... all the things I'm learning in one thread... People don't read profiles?! icon_eek.gif

    And I'm honestly surprised people are upset about profiles saying "not into black... white guys only... exc..." Good surprised, but surprised. It's always bothered me, but in my area (it's the south...) that's most profiles. It seems to be completely normalized. It doesn't even phase me anymore.


    You would think it should be more about personality and traits, but it's not. People can't wrap their head around the idea that individuals are more than their race.

    Nobody has a legitimate reason as to why you need to disclose what racial preference you have, other than "I'm to lazy to wade through all of the races I am not attracted to."

    People want to move away from a world full of racial stigmas, and yet they openly practice racial discrimination.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Oct 18, 2012 12:43 AM GMT
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    Oct 18, 2012 12:44 AM GMT
    Neight saidm4m vgl ddf bbd abc123 r2d2 a1 steak sauce


    What's BBD? +D