Off topic.. prejudice to asian ?

  • Jakey_jakey

    Posts: 14

    Oct 18, 2012 4:04 AM GMT
    Ok..hopefully this wont turn into a mad thread like other asian issue topics..
    And I aplogize in advance if this appears to be offensive to some of you..

    I am asian and I recently moved to the bay area. So far I am loving it.
    I was told by some of my friends that there's still prejudice towards asian and I was kinda prepared for it
    But turns out, everybody was nice and all funny thing is the first person that I had terrible service here was by asian firl lol well that was just matter of customer service.

    So I was just fine.....until today.

    I was lining up at starbucks to get a cup of coffee.
    This lady was cashing and taking orders from all the customers in the line.
    She was smiling and talking to the customers telling thank you and ask names to write on the cups.

    And mu turn comes and her face suddenly changed and said "what do you want" with a totally different tone of voice.
    I was kinda shocked but she looked very bothered and irritated. She gave me my change without a word and she
    Put it on the counter instead of handing it to me
    She was asking customers names to write on the cups but she never said a word beside her "what do you want" with irritated face

    I was bothered as well but then I thought her customer service was just horrible but then again, I was observing oher helping customers after me she was all nice and bubbly

    In my head, i was just thinking what the heck did i do!? I couldnt think of any reason that i couold possibly offend her.
    I was suspposed to sit and use my laptop but I was so irritated that I had to leave.
    I shouldve talked to her and asked her whats wrong with her

    I see a lot of asian people here in the bay area but i could not come up with any other reason that i could possibsle offend her.

    I am sorry if this posts offends anyone here but i just had to let it out....ugh!

    (Sorry for the typo hard to type on my phone)

  • AMoonHawk

    Posts: 11406

    Oct 18, 2012 4:38 AM GMT
    that really sucks .. maybe she thought you were someone else she had served before .... I would have called her on it ... I would have said very snidely:
    "excuse me ... but do you know me? or is there are reason you are being so short with me?"
    and then I would have said after I paid ... "I would have left you a tip, but obviously you think you're too good for my money"

    sorry you got dumped on by a jerk
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    Oct 18, 2012 4:42 AM GMT
    Are Asians bad tippers?
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    Oct 18, 2012 4:45 AM GMT
    unfounded7 saidAre Asians bad tippers?


    I dunno, put a sleeping cow in front of them and see how they do.
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    Oct 18, 2012 4:47 AM GMT
    Jakey_jakey saidOk..hopefully this wont turn into a mad thread like other asian issue topics..



    Prepare to be disappointed.
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    Oct 18, 2012 4:59 AM GMT
    Previously she was diversity director at Gallaudet.
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    Oct 18, 2012 5:06 AM GMT
    There are lots of Asian people in San Francisco, so even if she were prejudiced, I don't understand how the woman functions if she really has that much hatred for Asians. The bitch needs to move to fucking Kansas or something. But honestly, I've had people be rude to me for no apparent reason too. I actually called to report some bitch who was mean as hell to me at a restaurant last week. Some people are just assholes, and most of the time it has nothing to do with prejudice. But there are plenty of prejudice people out there, so the best thing to do is just realize you're better than that.
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    Oct 18, 2012 5:09 AM GMT
    Ariodante said
    I dunno, put a sleeping cow in front of them and see how they do.



    Animated Gifs
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    Oct 18, 2012 5:22 AM GMT
    unfounded7 said
    Ariodante said
    I dunno, put a sleeping cow in front of them and see how they do.



    Animated Gifs


    you're right, Asians don't drink milk.
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    Oct 18, 2012 5:25 AM GMT
    LOL. Race relations is a funny thing. If you're in a city where Asians (or whatever race) has a sizable population, you'd think that people would be accepting. But from my experience, it tends to have the opposite effect. I grew up an area where it was majority white and Hispanic. And very few Asians. But over the decades, the demographics shifted to majority Asian, mostly Hispanic, and very little white.

    I went back home to visit my parents not too long ago. I had to run a few errands and do some shopping as well. And I experienced the same thing as the OP. Cashier (Latina) was super nice and friendly to the Latino and white customers. But when it was my turn, total opposite. Did not even utter a word to me. I even said hello. But got nothing out of her. Not even a moment of eye contact. Had a similar experience at another store.

    I dunno. Maybe she had a bad experience with an Asian person. Or maybe she was just fed up with being surrounded by Asians. It's just sad that someone can harbor that much hate or disdain towards another race for arbitrary reasons.
  • winwin

    Posts: 264

    Oct 18, 2012 10:09 AM GMT
    Being an Asian myself, I have never exeprienced that kind of prejudice from a non Asian. Surprisingly, I have experienced prejudice twice from two gay asian guys. They thought I was a threat to them because they accused me of flirting with their white boyfriends and trying to steal them away from them. One of them even hissed at me!icon_rolleyes.gif
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    Oct 18, 2012 3:09 PM GMT
    Sometimes it's not prejudice, but rather jealousy or envy. Some people resent people of color who've done well for themselves (and that includes people of color resenting other people of color). My brother, for example, ended up donating his one-year-old Eurpean car to Goodwill because he felt a lot of resentment (and experienced unpleasant behavior) from other people whenever he drove that car. I'm not sure if this was the case here since your factual recitation was a bit ambiguous. In any event, there's no need to be confrontational or defensive if you're faced with that situation again. Just be kind and try to put yourself in his or her situation. Humility and empathy can go a long way in trying to change people's behavior towards you.
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    Jun 18, 2013 5:05 PM GMT
    unfounded7 saidAre Asians bad tippers?


    yep , indians are especially bad tippers(part indian here) - I try to negotiate the tip down lol JK i tip accordingly
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    Jun 18, 2013 5:19 PM GMT
    I woulda figured you would be used to this sort of thing by now?
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    Jun 18, 2013 5:22 PM GMT
    Never take that crap from anyone.
    I've never lost my temper but have said so many times to cashiers, "WHY are you talking to me like that?" or (when I'm done) "SO sorry to bother you."
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    Jun 18, 2013 5:27 PM GMT
    nevz saidI woulda figured you would be used to this sort of thing by now?


    icon_rolleyes.gif as a gay man, ask yourself that question pertaining to receiving prejudice from others for being gay and tell me if you were right for saying that to him.
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    Jun 18, 2013 5:40 PM GMT
    JohnSpotter saidNever take that crap from anyone.
    I've never lost my temper but have said so many times to cashiers, "WHY are you talking to me like that?" or (when I'm done) "SO sorry to bother you."


    Cashiers are people too, I work as a cashier on weekends and sometimes I'm having a really rough day - being super jolly to every customer does become tiresome and sometimes I forget to smile or something and customers really take it the wrong way. Not everything is intentional and sometimes it would be nice if a customer was jolly to me.
  • TannerMasseur

    Posts: 7893

    Jun 18, 2013 5:43 PM GMT
    I would have used psychology & been sarcastic to her, smiled at her & said, "O ur so nice to everyone, I love ur smile icon_smile.gif I love how u treat everyone so nice & equal! Keep doing a great job sweetie! In fact, where's ur manager?! I want to tell him or her what great service u provide everytime I come here! Ur so sweet!" icon_smile.gif .....Kill the bitch with kindness, maybe she'll change for the better so next time u come in she'll remember u & treat u differently & equal like she does everyone else icon_smile.gif .....
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    Jun 18, 2016 2:51 PM GMT
    https://www.ushmm.org/wlc/en/article.php?ModuleId=10007392Martin Niemöller (1892–1984) was a prominent Protestant pastor who emerged as an outspoken public foe of Adolf Hitler and spent the last seven years of Nazi rule in concentration camps.

    Niemöller is perhaps best remembered for the quotation:

    First they came for the Socialists, and I did not speak out—
    Because I was not a Socialist.

    Then they came for the Trade Unionists, and I did not speak out—
    Because I was not a Trade Unionist.

    Then they came for the Jews, and I did not speak out—
    Because I was not a Jew.

    Then they came for me—and there was no one left to speak for me.