Roommate drinks lots of beer. What determines alcoholism?

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    Oct 26, 2012 10:02 PM GMT
    I can't stand the massive beer drinking. Maybe a few beers and he's "ha ha" but after many he becomes belligerent and obnoxious. He'll but a 12 pack on Sat and drink it up by Sunday. Then Monday he buys a 6 pack and finishes it by lunch on Tuesday. I've cut off the binge drinking since I own the house so the over drinking should stop but wonder what else may come up. He says a few beers don't get him drunk enough and he would drink for breakfast if he could but he goes to college and works.
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    Oct 26, 2012 10:05 PM GMT
    Oh I was thinking college roommate. He lives with you? I can't stand obnoxious or emotional drunks. Is this a routine thing?
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    Oct 27, 2012 1:13 AM GMT
    I think it has to do with when a person gets to the point where it's not just something they CAN do but something they CAN'T do without. I can easily do more than a six pack at times but I hardly ever do and I don't drink excessively like that on a regular basis. That's a tough spot to be in but might be worth discussing the next day after he's offended you yet he's back in his right state of mind.

    He needs to be respectful since it's your place. Doesn't sound like you oppose him drinking but limiting it to where he's not needing to get drunk, hence belligerent!
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    Oct 27, 2012 1:22 AM GMT
    You consider that "binge" or "heavy" drinking? LMAO, that's nothing. By Wisconsin standards you are only an alcoholic if you physically depend on it and are unable to skip for any reason, when you are mentally incapable of not drinking. Another criteria is if you are drinking all day constantly throughout the day keeping a constant buzz.

    If drinking every day (night) constituted alcoholism then almost everyone in this state would be alcoholic? lol. My neighbor lady goes through a 12 pack a night easily...starts at like 3pm or so. Everyone else I know AT LEAST drink on weekends. We have crazy tolerances here.
  • Timbales

    Posts: 13993

    Oct 27, 2012 1:28 AM GMT
    Either move out or kick him out as soon as you can.
  • ThatSwimmerGu...

    Posts: 3755

    Oct 27, 2012 1:33 AM GMT
    My roommate in college right now plays Minecraft for at least 16 hours a day and it's super annoying especially because he talks to the people playing on his headphones and screams half the time.
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    Oct 27, 2012 1:40 AM GMT
    I teach this stuff in my psych class. Like Mocktwinkles noted above, you really can't determine alcoholism by "amount" because people have different tolerances and local cultures have different habits. The best measure of "disorder", i.e. "are you an alcoholic?" is functionality. If his drinking (or any behavior or thought pattern) is interfering with someone's ability to function, his relationships, his ability to work, or his ability to enjoy life, etc then you it meets the psychological community's standard for a disorder. So, if he's skipping work, or missing classes, or missing opportunities, or ruining relationships because of his drinking, that is when the psychological community says "ok buddy, you've got a problem."

    And like Normalguy93's (right above this post) roomate who plays Minecraft 16 hours a day...if he's still paying his bills, moving forward with his life, and is content then he's ok. But, if he is missing work or is secretly depressed because his gaming makes him feel frustrated and he can't stop...disorder.
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    Oct 27, 2012 2:29 AM GMT
    Rockbiter saidI teach this stuff in my psych class. Like Mocktwinkles noted above, you really can't determine alcoholism by "amount" because people have different tolerances and local cultures have different habits. The best measure of "disorder", i.e. "are you an alcoholic?" is functionality. If his drinking (or any behavior or thought pattern) is interfering with someone's ability to function, his relationships, his ability to work, or his ability to enjoy life, etc then you it meets the psychological community's standard for a disorder. So, if he's skipping work, or missing classes, or missing opportunities, or ruining relationships because of his drinking, that is when the psychological community says "ok buddy, you've got a problem."

    And like Normalguy93's (right above this post) roomate who plays Minecraft 16 hours a day...if he's still paying his bills, moving forward with his life, and is content then he's ok. But, if he is missing work or is secretly depressed because his gaming makes him feel frustrated and he can't stop...disorder.


    It's true but not complete.
    Dysfunctional behavior is one thing, but alcohol abuse also severely damage the body even if your social and emotional live are not affected.
    Cirrhosis of the liver is not something cool, even if everybody think you are cool even (or because) when you drink a lot.
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    Oct 27, 2012 2:44 AM GMT
    I had a friend for about 20 years who I called a functional alcoholic. He'd be out almost every night until 2 am at least, downing drinks nonstop, yet in the office by 7:30 well into his 50s. He wasn't really much of a friend, only using me to accompany him to the bars when I was up to it as I lived near many of them. I think maybe in 20 years he might have had one dinner with me.

    A smart guy, he also could be very funny for the first few drinks of the night but then, exactly as the OP describes would inevitably become belligerent. As soon as he started bashing Ted Kennedy I knew he had too much to drink & the night was over for me. I'd excuse myself and leave.

    His drinking was doing terrible things to his health, all the way up to kidney stones (the guy never once ate a vegetable, not even lettuce) and who knows what else. Dude, you're pissing blood, take the hint. But he'd rather die than give up drinking. It made him happy.

    Yet he held a fairly high level, responsible job and was well respected at it. He was a very social guy and though he certainly had intimacy issues, he had a lot of people he considered friends. He was never able to hold onto an intimate relationship, not because of his drinking but because he didn't relate sexually to anyone over 21. It was pretty pathetic, actually. He dumped me as a friend a little after my mom died and I leaned on him for support. Just started treating me like shit after knowing me for 20 years. So I said the next time I want someone to treat me like shit, I'll give you a call. That was that. Cheers.
  • LJay

    Posts: 11612

    Oct 27, 2012 3:24 AM GMT
    OP, if this is simply a renter and not a friend, then whether he is an alcoholic or not is not really the point. No one should make you uncomfortable in your own home.
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    Oct 27, 2012 3:39 AM GMT
    He decides when he's an alcoholic.
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    Oct 27, 2012 3:42 AM GMT
    Fratlvr saidHe decides when he's an alcoholic.


    No, he decides when it's time to get treatment/do something about it. He could have a serious problem and be far from realizing it, which wouldn't take away from him still having the problem.
  • ThatSwimmerGu...

    Posts: 3755

    Oct 27, 2012 3:44 AM GMT
    Rockbiter saidI teach this stuff in my psych class. Like Mocktwinkles noted above, you really can't determine alcoholism by "amount" because people have different tolerances and local cultures have different habits. The best measure of "disorder", i.e. "are you an alcoholic?" is functionality. If his drinking (or any behavior or thought pattern) is interfering with someone's ability to function, his relationships, his ability to work, or his ability to enjoy life, etc then you it meets the psychological community's standard for a disorder. So, if he's skipping work, or missing classes, or missing opportunities, or ruining relationships because of his drinking, that is when the psychological community says "ok buddy, you've got a problem."

    And like Normalguy93's (right above this post) roomate who plays Minecraft 16 hours a day...if he's still paying his bills, moving forward with his life, and is content then he's ok. But, if he is missing work or is secretly depressed because his gaming makes him feel frustrated and he can't stop...disorder.

    Eh college dorm. I did a four person suite with random roommates.
  • FRE0

    Posts: 4864

    Oct 27, 2012 6:21 AM GMT
    I could accept someone who occasionally has a drink, but I could never have a good relationship with anyone to whom drinking ethanol is important. I cannot stand people who are obviously under the influence.

    When I was a 17 year old preppy, I observed how people behaved when under the influence. Boys would sneak out of the dormitory, come back drunk, and vomit all over; it was disgusting. I saw the same thing in college. I've also known people who have destroyed themselves and others by drinking. I realize that many people can drink occasionally and never have a problem with it, but I early decided never to ingest ethanol and have not.
  • A_1991

    Posts: 366

    Oct 27, 2012 6:29 AM GMT
    isnt that normal for college students? my roomates drink a 6 pack everyday, wake and bake, and are still functioning. I dont know how they do that and pass their classes with A's...
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    Oct 27, 2012 7:24 AM GMT
    theantijock saidI had a friend for about 20 years who I called a functional alcoholic. He'd be out almost every night until 2 am at least, downing drinks nonstop, yet in the office by 7:30 well into his 50s. He wasn't really much of a friend, only using me to accompany him to the bars when I was up to it as I lived near many of them. I think maybe in 20 years he might have had one dinner with me.

    A smart guy, he also could be very funny for the first few drinks of the night but then, exactly as the OP describes would inevitably become belligerent. As soon as he started bashing Ted Kennedy I knew he had too much to drink & the night was over for me. I'd excuse myself and leave.

    His drinking was doing terrible things to his health, all the way up to kidney stones (the guy never once ate a vegetable, not even lettuce) and who knows what else. Dude, you're pissing blood, take the hint. But he'd rather die than give up drinking. It made him happy.

    Yet he held a fairly high level, responsible job and was well respected at it. He was a very social guy and though he certainly had intimacy issues, he had a lot of people he considered friends. He was never able to hold onto an intimate relationship, not because of his drinking but because he didn't relate sexually to anyone over 21. It was pretty pathetic, actually. He dumped me as a friend a little after my mom died and I leaned on him for support. Just started treating me like shit after knowing me for 20 years. So I said the next time I want someone to treat me like shit, I'll give you a call. That was that. Cheers.


    amazing how similar our stories are sometimes..
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    Oct 27, 2012 6:50 PM GMT
    This is funny.

    Alcohol is just one tiny symptom of the alcoholic.

    They are actually easier and better to be around when they are drinking. I'd watch out if he stopped.

    Like Rockbiter said...

    Normal people change their behavior to meet their goals. Alcoholics change their goals to meet their behavior.

  • FireDoor211

    Posts: 1030

    Oct 27, 2012 7:02 PM GMT
    the inability to function because your drinking is too obstructive.
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    Oct 27, 2012 7:04 PM GMT
    If he doesn't worry about having a problem, then he's got one.
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    Oct 27, 2012 9:10 PM GMT
    vanfreak said
    theantijock said...Just started treating me like shit after knowing me for 20 years. So I said the next time I want someone to treat me like shit, I'll give you a call. That was that. Cheers.


    amazing how similar our stories are sometimes..


    Did my close friends screw you too? I am so sorry. I should have taken them out while I had them in my sites.
  • HottJoe

    Posts: 21366

    Oct 28, 2012 1:43 PM GMT
    mocktwinkles saidYou consider that "binge" or "heavy" drinking? LMAO, that's nothing. By Wisconsin standards you are only an alcoholic if you physically depend on it and are unable to skip for any reason, when you are mentally incapable of not drinking. Another criteria is if you are drinking all day constantly throughout the day keeping a constant buzz.

    If drinking every day (night) constituted alcoholism then almost everyone in this state would be alcoholic? lol. My neighbor lady goes through a 12 pack a night easily...starts at like 3pm or so. Everyone else I know AT LEAST drink on weekends. We have crazy tolerances here.


    Haha, that explains a lot. ;)
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    Oct 29, 2012 12:01 AM GMT
    Pfft...I get half/borderline drunk every night, then wake up early and either go mountain biking, walking/jogging, workout, or go to work...always feeling refreshed, with no hangover.

    Then again, I don't drink beer. Beer is the horse piss of alcoholism.
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    Oct 29, 2012 12:14 AM GMT
    HOW COULD YOU!? icon_eek.gif


    Y o u ' r e G i v i n g m e s u c h S W E E T N O T H I N G !
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    Oct 29, 2012 7:43 PM GMT
    paulflexes saidPfft...I get half/borderline drunk every night, then wake up early and either go mountain biking, walking/jogging, workout, or go to work...always feeling refreshed, with no hangover.

    Then again, I don't drink beer. Beer is the horse piss of alcoholism.


    One of the main problems is that a lot of people who consume large amounts of alcohol aren't "health conscious" enough to live their life in a way that will offset their vice -- I know a lot of people who barely drink and they have non-alcoholic fatty liver from their diet and lifestyle. The key is lots of water (alcohol dehydrates which creates ripple health effects), a healthy diet, a good well-rounded nutritional supplement to offset depletion from alcohol (a number of nutrients including Vitamin E, etc etc etc), extra b-vitamin complex to replace what the alcohol depletes, n-acetyl cysteine (precursor for generating extra amounts of glutathione in the body, the body's master antioxidant that quells alcohol damage to the liver and pancreas where it is found in highest concentrations), lots of lecithin (PPC in lecithin has been shown in a number of studies spanning 10 years to completely halt liver and pancreas damage while using it with alcohol consumption), SAMe (for extra glutathione production in the body), extra Vitamin C, alpha lipoic acid, l-carnitine.

    If you're a drinker and you love drinking but you care about your health READ THIS: http://www.healingcare4u.org/preventing-SlowingLiverDamageDrinkers4-27-10-lecithin.pdf
  • Vaughn

    Posts: 1880

    Oct 29, 2012 8:00 PM GMT
    mocktwinkles saidYou consider that "binge" or "heavy" drinking? LMAO, that's nothing. By Wisconsin standards you are only an alcoholic if you physically depend on it and are unable to skip for any reason, when you are mentally incapable of not drinking. Another criteria is if you are drinking all day constantly throughout the day keeping a constant buzz.

    If drinking every day (night) constituted alcoholism then almost everyone in this state would be alcoholic? lol. My neighbor lady goes through a 12 pack a night easily...starts at like 3pm or so. Everyone else I know AT LEAST drink on weekends. We have crazy tolerances here.


    He's in college my roommate and I polished off a 30 pack and a bottle of Vodka last weekend.


    Beware beerpong season.