Your coming out experiance.

  • rudolphe

    Posts: 156

    Oct 30, 2012 10:43 AM GMT
    For those of you that are out of the closet when you exposed yourselves to your family and friends would you say it was an overall positive or negative experiance? And for our friends that are still in the closet, whats holding you back? what do you think could happen?
  • calibro

    Posts: 8888

    Oct 30, 2012 2:20 PM GMT
    i never exposed myself to my family or friends
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Oct 30, 2012 2:24 PM GMT
    i have been really really lucky, ive never experienced any homophobic behaviour... I came out on school when i was 13 years old, had had my first boyfriend then too, who just so happened to be the one guy i fell for in school. I had no problems with any of the kids in school, even though it was all boys. It turns out that all of my friends were gay to... So i had a very close unit of gay friends.. We started going to clubs at 13 and thats that... Here i am today, 17 years later.. My parents were cool l too, my mum loved it, my dad took a few weeks to come around.. At 13 he prob thought it was a mixed feelings..
  • wellwell

    Posts: 2265

    Oct 30, 2012 2:34 PM GMT
    Never been "in."

    (...Well, maybe a day-or-two.)
  • Pontifex

    Posts: 1882

    Oct 30, 2012 2:41 PM GMT
    I was never exactly in. I did end up clarifying it for everyone at one point but I never really hid it. I automatically do a double take every time I see a hot guy so hiding is impossible. I've never really experienced a problem with it.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Oct 30, 2012 2:42 PM GMT
    So, I haven't told the majority of my family, as our relationship is strained enough, and I am sure that they would never see me again. I'm pretty open with everyone else. The few family members that do know found out in an interesting way.

    My erstwhile bf, Chris, and I were staying with my cousins (they thought we were just "bros"). After a night of running around drinking we all made it back to their home. In the middle of the night Chris decides he needs to go get something from the kitchen, and he trips down the stairs. There he is naked at the bottom of the staircase, bleeding from a head wound.

    So this wakes everyone up, and we're all standing at the bottom of the stairs. I'm also drunk and not dressed at this point. Then I turn to the sober cousin and I'm like, "So... Chris is my boyfriend. Can you take us to the hospital?" It's kind of funny looking back on it, but it all ended well.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Oct 30, 2012 2:43 PM GMT
    http://www.realjock.com/gayforums/2675899/

    If you would like to have a read icon_smile.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Oct 30, 2012 2:45 PM GMT
    It was all positive thankfully.
  • TheAlchemixt

    Posts: 2294

    Oct 30, 2012 3:29 PM GMT
    My dad put me in a choke hold when he found out, I was 16. Right before that my mother asked me if I had sex with the guy for money and I said, "No, I did it for free." That's my coming out story.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Oct 30, 2012 3:37 PM GMT
    This is going to make me sound like a slut, but it was a few years ago.... I came out 10 minutes before a 3 some with a mate and his girlfriend, was an interesting period in my life... After that, i just told people and they couldn't care less
  • atlxc

    Posts: 97

    Oct 30, 2012 4:51 PM GMT
    My mother got shit faced with a 12 pack of Corona I had in my fridge. I was expecting the worst thereafter, but thankfully her and the rest of my family is much more open minded than I though and came to an understanding of my sexuality. Hell! She's even asked me if I was a top or a btm?

    Btw I think it runs in the family, I have a 20 year old gay brother!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Oct 30, 2012 4:56 PM GMT
    I was 20 when I came out to everyone in 2006. Apart from being shocked and surprised, and the obvious panel of questions nobody was negative about it. My family said that they would still love me the same, though my dad did admit that it would take him some time to get used to seeing me with another guy. A few months afterwards I had my first boyfriend and they were as supportive as can be. Friends were the same - no negativity and we kept making jokes like we always had.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Oct 30, 2012 5:02 PM GMT
    Came out a couple of months ago to my family and friends. All were very supportive except my mother. She went into denial, rage, and then depression over it.

    Now she's totally fine with it and we joke about it a lot. She still believes that it was my "choice" and not something I had no control over. In due time I guess.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Oct 30, 2012 5:09 PM GMT
    I came out to friends a long time ago. I just came out to my folks. All were very receptive and understanding... a very positive experience.
  • in_this_corne...

    Posts: 704

    Oct 30, 2012 5:23 PM GMT
    My family was Incredibly supportive which was surprising considering their leanings.

    Mom reaction - Told her in 1996. She tried to steal my thunder and, in turn, told me of her same sex relationship with a woman of 7 years. I knew in the back of my mind that her 'roommate' of 7 years was more than a friend after she divorced my father. I mean, her roommate was a captain in the army and the captain of their softball team. icon_lol.gif We cried for a hot minute and it was clearly a non-issue. However, my mom is back to men, it was a phase.

    Dad and step mom reaction - 'Whoa that's not what you hope to hear, but we love you regardless.' First comment from the phone call where I told them I needed them to sign a power of attorney naming my partner and I as the one in control of certain things. They signed it and sent it back.

    Grandparent's reaction - Seemingly unphased. Christmas cards addressed both me and my partner ever since.

    3 Brothers - "Yeah, and?"

    Nobody else really matters.

    Things have been good ever since.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Oct 30, 2012 5:43 PM GMT
    Somehow my parents found out I use Realjock, questioned me, I admitted it. They said they don't believe me, but if its true they'll love me either way, cried like a bitch. I still make gay jokes around them, which they're slowly starting to laugh at again haha. I know its wrong, but if I can't make fun of myself I have no right to make fun of others.
  • tazzari

    Posts: 2937

    Oct 30, 2012 5:52 PM GMT
    Never had a bad reaction. Not once.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Oct 30, 2012 6:16 PM GMT
    it was very crappy, but you gotta what you gotta do!
  • rudolphe

    Posts: 156

    Oct 30, 2012 6:22 PM GMT
    melbourne92 saidhttp://www.realjock.com/gayforums/2675899/

    If you would like to have a read icon_smile.gif


    amazing story Mel, thank you for sharing.
  • Just_Tim

    Posts: 1723

    Oct 30, 2012 7:16 PM GMT
    It's was very underwhelming and dull.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Oct 30, 2012 9:35 PM GMT
    Mine was bad, brothers were disgusted with me, my dad told me it was a bad career move, and my grandma almost threw up. She is catholic. Only my sister was supportive.
  • Vaughn

    Posts: 1880

    Oct 30, 2012 10:14 PM GMT
    Anticlimatic.... My Ma told me she was glad she didn't have to worry anymore about me knocking up some chick.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Oct 30, 2012 10:30 PM GMT
    I came out to my mother last month. She said "Okay". Other than a short conversation about how I'm still me, and always her son and she loves me, blah blah blah, that was about it. My brother-in-law #1: "All good with me, bro. Why didn't you tell me earlier?...are you going to talk to your sister?" Sister #1: "Yea, I already know. It's cool". Sister #2 and brother-in-law: "Finally!", then a big hug.

    Pretty uneventful, yet supportive and a lot of love. I have an awesome family.
  • IAmTheOneWhoK...

    Posts: 154

    Oct 30, 2012 11:53 PM GMT
    My brother and me who were never really close were having one of those "moments" where you're alone together and just talk for a while and bond. He's describing his ex-girlfriend and telling me how lonely he is and how much he misses her and I'd just broken up with a guy so I knew how he was feeling.

    I told him I know what it's like to want someone but not be able to be with them, but he knew I hadn't been dating any girl at my high school. We just look at each other for a really long time and he finally asks "Are you?" and we both knew what he was asking and I nodded and start crying like a bitch while he hugs me and tells me it doesn't matter and that he won't tell Mom and Dad until I'm ready.

    Then I find out the next day that he immediately told them. They were fine with it, but I ignored my brother for half a year after that and never confide in him anymore about personal stuff. Other than that, it was pretty good I suppose.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Oct 30, 2012 11:57 PM GMT
    IAmTheOneWhoKnocks saidMy brother and me who were never really close were having one of those "moments" where you're alone together and just talk for a while and bond. He's describing his ex-girlfriend and telling me how lonely he is and how much he misses her and I'd just broken up with a guy so I knew how he was feeling.

    I told him I know what it's like to want someone but not be able to be with them, but he knew I hadn't been dating any girl at my high school. We just look at each other for a really long time and he finally asks "Are you?" and we both knew what he was asking and I nodded and start crying like a bitch while he hugs me and tells me it doesn't matter and that he won't tell Mom and Dad until I'm ready.

    Then I find out the next day that he immediately told them. They were fine with it, but I ignored my brother for half a year after that and never confide in him anymore about personal stuff. Other than that, it was pretty good I suppose.


    why did he doe it?