gavinw35 saidIt is what it is. Have a complicated long distance relationship for over a year and a half. Just got done visiting him this last weekend.. had a beyond amazing time and now that I'm home looking to the future it just will not work. I'm transferring to his college next year. He's going to be a senior and is going to study abroad. We would only get a term together. Hah I feel so fucking pathetic right now and alone. I can't talk to him about it because I'm afraid of what he will say. And I don't want to seem weak. Sorry I'm venting on here because I'm just broken. Really broken over this and I have no one to go to since no one knows I'm bi or whatever I am.
*Petpats and hugs* :3
You're not pathetic schveetie.
It's perfectly naturally what you feel! It's called "being honest with yourself," even in the face of adversity. The adversity is his reaction to your feelings, your thoughts-- to sever him out because you feel it cannot work, despite the connections and the chemistry.
But love is much more than about those things. It's also about fulfilling each others needs. His needs may be partially satisfied with the distance but yours cannot be. Respect that and know there's nothing to feel ashamed about. It is what it is-- you want proximity, closeness, and the ability to be nearby the person you care about and love. It's too much to expect to have a 10/10 relationship when you're so far away. Eventually, someone is going to run out of steam and stop. That's just how we are as human beings. We may be intelligent but we're still animal too. We want our mates close by. Him/her being absent too long creates a rift that's hard to fulfill purely by verbal exchanges of any kind.
So. It's okay. If you need to let go, let go. Don't hate yourself and don't push yourself over the edge. If your partner loves you, if he understands, he will get it-- especially if you're sincere and honest about yourself and how you feel. No one can deny you of the feelings you feel.
So, get crackin' good lookin'!