HndsmKansan saidThe two are different, but linked. When one is a kid, families convey a bit of this, but it really is on the individual to develop it based on life's experiences. Both are certainly improved by a person reaching certain goals, achievement and making the right decisions.
I was just thinking, achieving goals are like building blocks for confidence. I set myself a goal, achieve it and I become confident with all the small things I have completed. There will be fuck ups, misjudgments and failures along the way. Hell, you can become confident through failure by learning what NOT to do. Self esteem is loving yourself for your achievements and failures. (This is a tough one for me.)
The opposite of confidence is fear. Fear will keep you from trying for any goal. Keep trying, taking risks.
I do believe there are guys less anxious than others. They are prone to more risk taking which builds confidence. There are people who thrive on charging into battle, there are those who thrive on analyzing and making an accurate and precise decision before acting. I'm one of those anxious, analytical people.
I learned what others around me termed "shyness" was really my introverted temperament. Some people are more boisterous, gregarious and talk WAY too much. I was shamed into thinking my quiet, reflective, contemplative nature was a bad thing. (Fuck YOU Dale Carnegie, Norman Vincent Peale and Philip Zimbardo!!!) Now I know I process all available info, weigh all factors, consider other elements of the situation...then I speak with accuracy and confidence. That is why I rule the classroom...OKIIRRRR!
If you consider yourself "shy" keep trying to put yourself out there, no matter how hard it is. If you're afraid you'll say something stupid, guess what, the best bullshitters are those who can't shut the fuck up. Take it easy, take it slow. A great element of confidence is letting oneself be oneself, and loving.
For what it's worth.