Does Race/ethnicity play any role in you choosing a guy ?

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 04, 2012 6:03 PM GMT
    I have always been told by my parents that everyone is equal..so i never felt any different to the White,Yellow ,Brown & the Black people.

    I have seen many threads on racism.
    SO here's my poll on as how many of you hold the orthodox views of love within the same race

    I had a Caucasian man who was not of my race & came over to my country ,i have been his guard,his guide,his best friend , his comrade,his local translator,his driver, his local food enthusiast ,all that i can & i never took any money or financial aid from his ..just did what a normal civilian should do!
    I met him through a common gay(white) friend in UAE

    He was very centrist guy who had strict Ku Klux Klan following (google it)
    But there were times when many of the Muslim extremist guys surrounded him & threatened him to leave the country,
    I was at his side & supported him still
    BY the time he was leaving the country after a year
    , he cried in my arms like a innocent baby
    saying he fell in love with me
    & he confessed that he used to avenge hatred on non-white race people in the US &
    spread half of his life against the Black & Arab people but i made him understand that love is the biggest thing in the world.

    But sadly i never had any feeling for him other than a friend ,he always abused people & used slurs for other races in front of me ,I still have those on my mind & it spooks me
    Before going he asked me to ask him whatever i can ask & he'd gift me that
    no matter how costly that was , i asked nothing in return ..just a good hug

    He was shocked as almost everyone in my country dupped him for money but i never asked him for anything though he wanted to gift me in some hundred thousands of US dollars as a love gesture ( he was a very wealthy guy)
    He will always be grateful to God for showing him the right path

    I feel happy that he is no-more a mentally driven person HATING someone for being whatever he/she is !

    Why does race & ethnicity play such a prime role in choosing a partner ?
    Do you follow the norms?
    ( i know its controversial so i dont quite expect many posts)
  • TheBizMan

    Posts: 4091

    Nov 04, 2012 6:04 PM GMT
    Sam_u_el said
    ( i know its controversial so i dont quite expect many posts)

    I think you mean the opposite.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 04, 2012 6:05 PM GMT
    No
    /thread
    /done
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 04, 2012 6:08 PM GMT
    I dont think of sex 24/7

    I have been in love with people from all races in the past

    but many of my friends they're like
    " we are arabs ,we are the purest of all races ,etc etc"

    Dunno what fuels into this ?
    why don't people think of a person than a race at first ?

    PS : (Not all Arabs are the same)
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    Nov 04, 2012 6:18 PM GMT
    I'm only attracted to white guys. I don't care what ethnicity they are whether they're Mediterranean (like me), Alpine, Nordic, Slav or w/e as long as they're white. It's just my preference cause I like European features. I don't think that anyone needs to justify why they prefer what they prefer, they just do.

    Some people prefer thicker men/women, are they weightists? Some people prefer dogs over cats, are they specieist? No, it's just their preference. And why should they have to pretend to like something they don't just to look like they're progressive and enlightened? People should just be with whomever makes them happy and not be made to feel like they're being judged for their choices or lack thereof.

    Just my two cents.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 04, 2012 6:25 PM GMT
    To answer your questions:
    Ethnicity plays a big role in choosing a lover for some people for one of two reasons:
    1. Some people are racist, or biased towards certain ethnicities
    2. The media has made caucasian people the norm of beauty. Some people aren't racist, they just have a predefined vision of beauty that is more focused on skin color than anything else.
    (I know I may get some grief for the second statement, but whatever. I'll take it)

    I honestly don't care what "color" my future lover is. (But I do hope he is handsome. Yes I know I'm shallow icon_rolleyes.gif ) I've seen plently of guys on here that get my attention, mostly because they are so handsome, and their profiles are interesting. (Yes their bodies look great too. Again I know I'm shallow icon_rolleyes.gif )
    Love is most important to me. Looks come second. Ethnicity isn't even on the list for me.
  • TheBizMan

    Posts: 4091

    Nov 04, 2012 6:35 PM GMT
    People are happy in their bubble. Far to many individuals don't even attempt to, or are completely afraid to leave it.

    They try to pass off race as a preference because that is far easier than trying to connect with someone on a deeper level than appearance.

    People are superficial and hedonistic by nature... so really what can you expect?
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 04, 2012 8:37 PM GMT
    No this is a very subjective question...

    It this was YES and NO question I would say NO!

    If let say in a situation like in a work place so happen you team up with a guy at work with a partner, somewhere the bromance kicks in then later stage the funny feeling kicks in then the love comes in then it touches the heart and you become lovers, now does that encase the ethnicity? No right? by default? so choosing is subjective to the eyes,on physical level where we subconsciously should be using at most 1/3 of what we are okay with it! That is what made us to see things for acceptance on a basic level ,and its a problem when you are picky in life!

    the balance 2/3 is whats then unseen matters, the invisible force of loyal and that royal bond!. Now if that person is a black or white grey yellow orange brown almond or whatever , what actually set a pure perfect love is that unseen medium where one another don't speaks much, but the vibes does the talk/communication, now thats what pure actually love is! Its beyond distance and time.

    Thats why sometimes I would want to ask god Why when there is deep true love or he is that true partner, cant we like talk and communicate between within our mind! then to speak out? like Professor X does! Life would be so much more holy between 2 person, where cheating will be solved

    well I've not find nor fall in love deeply, when it happens I would like it to be a way we communicate from within then just speaking out where all the drama quarrelsome happens with all deceive feelings thats just waste of time in the love knots, Kill the knot of making tighter or loosen, we need something more durable!, and I think your little love cupid are just not enough! life has turn very complicated, and your lovely cupid are just working overtime!

    that said above Nothing is set as a matter, only influences and mind speaks on how diverse you accepts and make up situations, of such layout options of making Ethnicity a peculiar matter, and i dont want to touch into religion. If you have the basic set of mind knowing what is rational and of its means then I would say you are well off in life! you wont succumb into boundaries.

    When love is above sex genders, race or ethnicity is nothing, its just a grain of rice we are magnifying. Then again those traumatize racist always have such issue when they see color!

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 04, 2012 8:40 PM GMT
    Yellow people?
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 04, 2012 8:42 PM GMT
    2much saidYellow people?
    It's the derogatory term to describe Asians.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 04, 2012 8:49 PM GMT
    Neight said
    2much saidYellow people?
    It's the derogatory term to describe Asians.


    I know. I was just wondering why he singled out the Asians to be derogatory towards.
  • agro

    Posts: 199

    Nov 04, 2012 11:31 PM GMT
    Neight said
    2much saidYellow people?
    It's the derogatory term to describe Asians.


  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 05, 2012 12:57 AM GMT
    2much said
    Neight said
    2much saidYellow people?
    It's the derogatory term to describe Asians.


    I know. I was just wondering why he singled out the Asians to be derogatory towards.


    If "yellow" is a derogatory word for Asians, then why aren't "black", "brown" and "white" also derogatory?
  • kevmoran

    Posts: 1543

    Nov 05, 2012 1:04 AM GMT
    I've dated guys of all races, but that's not to say I don't discriminate. We all have preferences, my preferences aren't about race but other things like height and demeanor. I don't think I'm any less of a bad person than those who have race preferences, I'm singling out people despite what they are inside. We all kinda suck.
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    Nov 05, 2012 2:04 AM GMT
    I don't really date blacks, whites, asians, latinos, or arabs, and definitely not half-breeds.




    ........Just a preference icon_cool.gif
  • Medjai

    Posts: 2671

    Nov 05, 2012 2:12 AM GMT
    Neight said
    2much saidYellow people?
    It's the derogatory term to describe Asians.


    But it's okay to use the terms white and black? Come down off your high horse.

    For me, skin tone as well as many other features plays into attraction, just like anyone else. I prefer lighter skin tones, just like I prefer men, don't prefer redheads, out value on good dentition, and enjoy someone who is less than obese.

    Do I think people I don't find attractive are less than human because of it? No. Do I treat them differently? Besides the fact that I'm less prone to sleep witht them, no. It's just what I like, nothing more.
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    Nov 05, 2012 2:30 AM GMT
    Sam_u_el said




    Why does race & ethnicity play such a prime role in choosing a partner ?
    Do you follow the norms?
    ( i know its controversial so i dont quite expect many posts)





    People are influenced by incidencies of erotic stimulation (IEC)

    If you live in the western world, over 90% of all IEC opporunities, adds, movies, porn etc, feature white people. So you strongly correlate it with arousal after a while.

    Testosterone expresses itself somewhat differently in males of different races and the western standard of beauty favors a very european form of testosterone expression.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 05, 2012 2:31 AM GMT
    nope i only like men with the fibbanaci ration
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 05, 2012 2:34 AM GMT
    Not in the least - really why should it? I like people for who they are - always have, always will. We all bleed the same color , right?
  • A_1991

    Posts: 366

    Nov 05, 2012 2:42 AM GMT
    racist-ucla-girl-meme-generator-i-hope-t
  • TheBizMan

    Posts: 4091

    Nov 05, 2012 3:02 AM GMT
    MA3000 said

    b033d0da-80b0-4142-bc33-fffce43c820e.jpg



    Mine bitch icon_mad.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 05, 2012 3:21 AM GMT
    Medjai said
    Neight said
    2much saidYellow people?
    It's the derogatory term to describe Asians.


    But it's okay to use the terms white and black? Come down off your high horse.


    Is that a high horse or a horse of a different color? I've never found a shade of grey but rather a clear difference between calling an Asian person yellow and calling an African American black or a caucasian white because it is the groups themselves who get to determine what they deem acceptable. And the black one has changed so many times in just my lifetime that it's actually been a little tough to follow. I'm glad they settled on black because African American (which I think was even Afro-American for a while there) is just too many syllables to reference quickly in conversation.

    It's no different than gay people preferring the word gay over the word homosexual as the latter beckons to days of greater denigration.

    When I think of yellow the first thing that comes to mind is jaundice. Hardly complimentary.
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    Nov 05, 2012 3:22 AM GMT
    Yes. Race and ethnicity play a role in my initial attraction, just as many other physical, emotional, personal, interpersonal, psychological, and societal qualities have their place as well.

    We all have things that we like and do not like in guys. I have seen in some other threads how a lot of RJ members rate, qualify, and critique guys (pretty much with model status) based on their looks. So let's not act like we're all perfect angels - we all appreciate different kinds of physical beauty more than others.

    People are not created equally. We're all different, and that's what makes us all interesting. Let's celebrate those differences. I don't expect everybody to like me, and I'm not going to like everyone else. Adopting a stance of superiority on the issue is when things go awry.

    Personally, mediterranean, latin, and "mixed" features strike me as exotic. Is there anything wrong with recognizing that? It doesn't mean I'll turn my back on a cute blondie if I come across one (who's that actor from Arrow anyways???), but it also doesn't mean that I'm 100% impartial across the board.

    Also, let's separate race and ethnicity. Race = genetics and physical traits. Ethnicity refers to the shared societal traits of a group of people. I think we can all agree that, generally speaking, a stereotypical Norwegian is different from a stereotypical Israeli is different from a stereotypical Filipino is different from a stereotypical person from the Galapagos Islands. Doesn't mean that every stereotype is true (no, not all Americans are geographically inept, not all Spaniards are Catholic, and not every Wisconsinite "likes cheese"), but it helps to start to sketch a rough draft of who a person may be to find other things to connect on. And we may just connect really well with a stereotypical type of person. We're all on REALJOCK.COM (*REAL* *JOCK*) for a reason, correct?

    Time to finish my movie. ;-)
  • Medjai

    Posts: 2671

    Nov 05, 2012 3:24 AM GMT
    theantijock said
    Medjai said
    Neight said
    2much saidYellow people?
    It's the derogatory term to describe Asians.


    But it's okay to use the terms white and black? Come down off your high horse.


    Is that a high horse or a horse of a different color? I've never found a shade of grey but rather a clear difference between calling an Asian person yellow and calling an African American black or a caucasian white because it is the groups themselves who get to determine what they deem acceptable. And the black one has changed so many times in just my lifetime that it's actually been a little tough to follow. I'm glad they settled on black because African American (which I think was even Afro-American for a while there) is just too many syllables to reference quickly in conversation.

    It's no different than gay people preferring the word gay over the word homosexual as the latter beckons to days of greater denigration.

    When I think of yellow the first thing that comes to mind is jaundice. Hardly complimentary.


    It's a word. You can associate whatever you wish with it. An alternative could be sunshine.

    The point it, it's hypocritical to say you can't describe Asian skin tones with a colour, the turn around and call Africans and Caucasians black and white, respectively.
  • Medjai

    Posts: 2671

    Nov 05, 2012 3:28 AM GMT
    cuerpoymente saidYes. Race and ethnicity play a role in my initial attraction, just as many other physical, emotional, personal, interpersonal, psychological, and societal qualities have their place as well.

    We all have things that we like and do not like in guys. I have seen in some other threads how a lot of RJ members rate, qualify, and critique guys (pretty much with model status) based on their looks. So let's not act like we're all perfect angels - we all appreciate different kinds of physical beauty more than others.

    People are not created equally. We're all different, and that's what makes us all interesting. Let's celebrate those differences. I don't expect everybody to like me, and I'm not going to like everyone else. Adopting a stance of superiority on the issue is when things go awry.

    Personally, mediterranean, latin, and "mixed" features strike me as exotic. Is there anything wrong with recognizing that? It doesn't mean I'll turn my back on a cute blondie if I come across one (who's that actor from Arrow anyways???), but it also doesn't mean that I'm 100% impartial across the board.

    Also, let's separate race and ethnicity. Race = genetics and physical traits. Ethnicity refers to the shared societal traits of a group of people. I think we can all agree that, generally speaking, a stereotypical Norwegian is different from a stereotypical Israeli is different from a stereotypical Filipino is different from a stereotypical person from the Galapagos Islands. Doesn't mean that every stereotype is true (no, not all Americans are geographically inept, not all Spaniards are Catholic, and not every Wisconsinite "likes cheese"), but it helps to start to sketch a rough draft of who a person may be to find other things to connect on. And we may just connect really well with a stereotypical type of person. We're all on REALJOCK.COM (*REAL* *JOCK*) for a reason, correct?

    Time to finish my movie. ;-)


    Just a side note, what genetic and physical traits define a race? Are you aware that race as a concept has been completely abandoned by the scientific community because it has no actual basis? Race is a purely cultural construct, and is completely intangible.