Awkward Situation with Female Friend

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    Nov 22, 2012 11:15 PM GMT
    (Sorry, this is long)

    The current thread entitled "Do you have more male or female friends?" prompted me to create this thread. As I stated in that thread, pretty much all my close friends are straight males. This is kind of by choice, as my experience with females has been that they are (generally) much more needy and play a lot of head-games, of which I want nothing to do with. However, that being said, I do have a couple of friends who are female and I'm currently having an issue with one of them.

    I don't see this girl that much and don't even talk on the phone with her but maybe once every couple of months. But whenever I see her, she insists on hugging me and touching me more than I'm comfortable with. She has made comments about my eyes and told me in no uncertain terms that she wants to "have an affair" outside her marriage. She knows I'm 100% gay, so I've just written those comments off over the years. We normally call each other and wish each other happy birthday each year, and maybe a small gift. But last November she told me she wanted to take me out to lunch for my birthday. No big deal. But she has me meet her at a pretty expensive restaurant, which made me slightly uncomfortable. But then I see all these colorful bags next to the table. Each time I unwrapped one gift, she would put another gift on the table. It made me very very uncomfortable and seemed very inappropriate considering I don't ever even hang out with this girl. So her birthday rolled around this past summer and I still felt so weird about what she did for my birthday that I just called her and wished her a happy birthday and left it at that. I felt no matter what I did, it wouldn't compare to all the gifts she gave me, so I did nothing. And just as I predicted, on my birthday this year, no phone call or anything from her, which is the first time since I've known her. I'm glad she didn't repeat all the lavish gifts this year, but obviously she's miffed. I saw her at the parking meters last week and she had very little to say to me. I'm almost glad just to get some personal space from her when I see her. I don't think I handled this in the best fashion, but not sure what to do about it now. Any input?
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    Nov 23, 2012 12:00 AM GMT
    let sleeping dogs lie....she got the message; let her process and respond in her time...if she doesnt' then move on.....my experience, and i love the ladies.....one issue with your op: i don't think they play the headgames nearly as well as gay men...at least from the limited number i've seen here....icon_wink.gif
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    Nov 23, 2012 12:03 AM GMT
    I wasn't trying to play a head-game....she just made me so uncomfortable it paralyzed me.
  • TheBizMan

    Posts: 4091

    Nov 23, 2012 12:08 AM GMT
    You could have gotten her SOMETHING..
  • TheBizMan

    Posts: 4091

    Nov 23, 2012 12:08 AM GMT
    It just makes you look like the typical defensive gay guy though.. Eww a girl was intruding on my personal space.. I'm so uncomfortable.
  • TheBizMan

    Posts: 4091

    Nov 23, 2012 12:09 AM GMT
    Not that it matters though. You're over 40 and set in your ways. You grew up in an era of typical gay men I guess
  • TheBizMan

    Posts: 4091

    Nov 23, 2012 12:10 AM GMT
    Happy thanksgiving!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 23, 2012 12:13 AM GMT
    Scruffypup saidI wasn't trying to play a head-game....she just made me so uncomfortable it paralyzed me.


    no no....you said in your op that females are better at playing headgames....i don't agree, having played for both teams.....the gay team imho is much better at fucking with your head.....ok?
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 23, 2012 12:26 AM GMT
    Women won't tell you this, but what they all want is to be pregnant and have a baby.
    It's a unique feminine experience which many women ache to enjoy.

    You could have given her the baby she wanted and you wouldn't be in this awkward situation and maybe still friends.
    All you would have had to do was skeet her deep once or twice (in the vag not the ass) and that would have been it.
    That's the only one way you could have "one upped her" for her birthday.

    The good news is that it may not be too late to salvage your friendship (if she's still ovulating). You could still reach out to her and offer to take her away on a weekend to some remote cabin or inn. Heck, you could even go budget and just take her to a place south of Rampart and give her the ultimate "birth"day gift there.

    I hope this helps.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 23, 2012 12:31 AM GMT
    jeez alan, i'm sure you 've met a coupla guys who want to carry your baby.....sheesh
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    Nov 23, 2012 12:42 AM GMT
    Keith51 saidjeez alan, i'm sure you 've met a coupla guys who want to carry your baby.....sheesh


    I have, but because I am HIV+, I chose not to impregnate the guys who wanted me to be the vessel for my lineage.