How do can you tell if a japanese boy is gay?

  • RogerW19

    Posts: 37

    Sep 09, 2008 9:26 PM GMT
    So I got new roommate on an exchange program. Well by his clothes and his movements he seems gay but i know the japanese culture is very different. So how do I find out if he is gay cause:

    1) he is hott
    2) I want to know
    3) I wanna find out about clubs there when i visit in a couple years
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    Sep 09, 2008 9:29 PM GMT
    How do you know if anyone is gay? Take the effort to get to know him. Read his body language -- see who he checks out in public. The eyes speak volumes.

    You'll also be living in a fairly confined environment with him, so you'll have plenty of opportunities to find out.

    Failing that, he could just come home drunk one night and end up crawling in your bed randomly like what happened to me in college. Now that's another story icon_lol.gif
  • ASH557

    Posts: 112

    Sep 10, 2008 12:27 AM GMT
    Oh. I was looking for the punch line.

    x
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    Sep 10, 2008 12:31 AM GMT
    I totally understand what you mean. Japanese and European fashions can be very misleading. At the same time many male Japanese celebrities that guys base their styles off of are rather effeminate looking. My advice is to just not make too many quick assumptions. What you can do is try to just talk things through - for the most part if you allow a Japanese person to know that you are open to discuss many things, they will too, because sometimes they can be blunt and sometimes they can be very reserved.

    It is really cool that you are interested in going to Japan though. that is awesome.
  • CuriousJockAZ

    Posts: 19136

    Sep 10, 2008 12:34 AM GMT
    RogerW19 said.

    So how do I find out if he is gay cause:



    That's easy, just ask him what his screen name is on RealJock icon_rolleyes.gif
  • SkyMiles

    Posts: 963

    Sep 10, 2008 12:45 AM GMT
    I SO thought this was a 'turning Japanese' joke icon_lol.gif


    But good luck in your quest! HEY, let us know if you find out!!!
  • MSUBioNerd

    Posts: 1813

    Sep 10, 2008 1:12 AM GMT
    Generally, the most conclusive way to know a guy is gay is to observe him having sex with a man. Even then, you can't rule out bi.

    The advice is really to get to know him and talk to him. You can start out by telling him that you're planning to go to Japan in the future and want to know what sorts of clubs to go to there, and does he have any suggestions? You could also always start out by giving him a few honest compliments. That's often a good way to indicate interest.
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    Sep 10, 2008 1:43 AM GMT
    I found it really tough with Japanese guys too, and it didn't help that so many of them were as shy as me, even in gay enclaves.

    Ni-chome is universally known as the area that gay guys go to in Tokyo. It'd be a great way to break the ice to mention that you'd heard of it and ask his opinion. (That's knee - cho - may if the language isn't your thing).

    I hope you enjoy your room mate, and love Japan.
  • realfoodie

    Posts: 9

    Sep 10, 2008 2:40 AM GMT
    The Japanese can be quite open and accepting about male x male love, but if you don't want to shock him too much, ask him if he knows about BL (boy love), and whether or not he's into that, whether it be in manga (comics) or otherwise.

    Good luck!
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    Sep 10, 2008 2:55 AM GMT
    LOL ask him if you can bukaki on him
  • RogerW19

    Posts: 37

    Sep 10, 2008 5:11 PM GMT
    Thanks guys for all the help I'm Definitely going to ask him about ni-chome
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    Sep 10, 2008 5:26 PM GMT
    I assume everyone is gay...but like the BF says "when they're down in front of me on their knees with my cock in their mouth."
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    Sep 10, 2008 5:29 PM GMT
    Watch very very carefully how he holds his chopsticks.....especially the way he places them when he is finished.........to the left GAY.....to the right BI.....
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    Sep 10, 2008 5:46 PM GMT
    The Japanese are pretty cool with it,especially younger folks.But just like other asian countries` people,they might be a bit shy when come to meet foreigners.Don`t be too aggressive,nor act like you are not interested in him at all.Just relax and try to make friends with him.


    Hope this may help.

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Homosexuality_in_Japan
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    Sep 11, 2008 7:57 AM GMT
    If he's young and a bishounen type ( pretty boys that almost look like a girl) + a great hairdo and funky clothes with lots of gadgets on... he;s most probably not gay.

    But if he's timid and straight looking, likes tea and enjoys long conversations.... he's more or less gay ^_^.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 11, 2008 9:23 AM GMT
    Serve him a glass of water and watch whether he raises his pinkie icon_rolleyes.gif
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    Sep 11, 2008 10:10 AM GMT
    ask him if he knows about yaoi comics.. emphasize on YAOI .. lol
  • looktothesky

    Posts: 13

    Sep 11, 2008 11:53 AM GMT
    Some of these suggestions are great! icon_biggrin.gif

    I have a gay Japanese friend who has told me some things to look out for when trying to find a gay Japanese man, but since he is only interested in a certain type of guy I only got the info on a type called gachi-muchi which are thick or muscle bound guys, I don't know if this is specifically a gay term.

    but gay gachi-muchi boys fashion tend to mimic american style, button down shirts,tight t-shirts, rugby polo. Vodix is a gay Japanese brand that caters to this type of guy: http://www.vodix-jp.com/

    so some Japanese guys follow a specific look to show their gayness while others might be just dressing like their favorite actor which they call ikemen, this is a general label for a good looking man but if you google it you find alot of prettier guys, styled hair, very fashionable guys etc. so yeah it's hard to really know unless you ask or find out somehow.

    Also, Japan is awesome especially if you have an interest in it. I've only been a couple times but both times were a great adventure, I never had a dull moment.
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    Sep 11, 2008 12:40 PM GMT
    Haha. Most of the younger Asian guys look Bishounen anyway. icon_razz.gif It doesn't mean they're gay. Metrosexuality is a given here. So yeah... kinda difficult to gauge. Why not just ask him? ^-^
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 12, 2008 3:15 AM GMT
    Japanese culture expects & rewards conformity. As a result, the number of gay men openly living out is thought to be lower than in Western countries. Gay men will often marry and have children to satisfy societal expectations.

    At the same time, the stigma for straight men having gay sex is not the same nature as we experience here in the US. Meaning Japanese men (at least those not in high profile public positions) can fool around with guys and not suffer from the massive guilt trip many American men do. Therefore, whether gay or not, your roommate might still be open to playing with you. But it may take time.

    The Japanese are shy and reserved in new & strange situations. They may appear outwardly engaged, but will guard their inner feelings. Although your roommate may be an exception, I wouldn't push him too much.

    I'd advise patience, but also show him your wares. Has he seen you naked before or after a shower, or while dressing? If you're cut that may be a tempting novelty for him.

    Does he know you're gay, or might suspect it? If he doesn't know, leaving a gay magazine on your bed or desk should tell him. But if he's strictly straight, that might frighten him (tales of the predatory gay, you know), even to switching roommates, so use that as a last resort.

    Most of all, just be friends with the guy. I'd love to spend some time with a Japanese exchange student, just for what I'd learn, and what I hope I'd be able to share with him. First & foremost you have a responsibility that he see the best side of the US. If that doesn't include sex with you, then so be it.


  • maxpark

    Posts: 9

    Sep 15, 2008 1:00 AM GMT
    If I were u, I will ask him "Shinjuku ni-chome ni itta koto arimasuka?" or "Machigatte tara gomen nasai. anata wa gay desuka?".

    Good luck!
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    Sep 15, 2008 1:11 AM GMT
    maxpark saidIf I were u, I will ask him "Shinjuku ni-chome ni itta koto arimasuka?" or "Machigatte tara gomen nasai. anata wa gay desuka?".

    Good luck!


    Not telling him what that means reminds me of a scene in the movie "My Big Fat Greek Wedding." The one where the bride's brothers trick the groom into announcing in Greek at their family gathering that "I have 3 testicles!" LOL!

    "Gay desuka" ???

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    Sep 15, 2008 11:58 PM GMT
    Ask him if he's been to Shinjuku-ni-chome..that's the area where the gay clubs and bars are in Tokyo (assuming he is from Tokyo or lives close by) :p