Marriage and Kids...

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 26, 2012 7:09 PM GMT
    This is a question for the younger set (32 and under) -- are marriage and kids something you want in your life? Do you believe in the institution of marriage for two people? And what, if you did get married, what would marriage mean to you?

    And...GO!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 26, 2012 7:48 PM GMT
    I'd like to get married but I just don't see it ever happening for me. I'm too erratic for most men and I tend to be kinda high maintinence. But I do want kids though and I would probably end up adopting on my own.
  • Amira

    Posts: 329

    Nov 26, 2012 9:43 PM GMT
    I've always had a strong desire to be married and of course have a family of my own. I've noticed that a lot of guys especially around my age don't care for either of the two and then you run into those who say they want it but are not willing to put in the hard work and dedication to see it through. Marriage to me is more than just a label that some people seek to throw around and flaunt to others. It's very personal, demanding but at the end of the day rewarding.

    At my job I am constantly running into elderly couples who are just as much as in love as they were when they both fell for each other. That to me is beautiful and goes to show you that marriage is more than just some title, it's something that bonds two people in a variety of dimensions.

    So yes I do feel that strongly there is a great possibility for me to get married in the future. I used to be skeptical about it a few years ago but I am so much more optimistic about the future.

    This may come across a little cheesy but I've always said this to myself.. That when I do get married the whole "till death do us part" line would never be of any relevance to me since I know that my love for that person would continue on in the afterlife. When you see the way that love can connect two people you just know that it can continue even after you are free from this physical realm.

    (Yeah I know I probably sound all weird and crazy icon_surprised.gif)
  • FuriousGeorge

    Posts: 181

    Nov 26, 2012 11:43 PM GMT
    Yes to both. I believe monogamy is a worthy institution for those who seek it, though I wouldn't push it on anybody. It represents security, devotion, and a solid foundation for building a family. Of course a marriage has love and passion too, but those three things are what distinguish marriage from, say, a long-term relationship without a commitment.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 27, 2012 1:10 PM GMT
    Great responses guys. I can't believe how few there are.

    I definitely want to get married and have kids. I believe it's a real big risk and commitment but an incredible pay off. The idea being, no matter what, the other person doesn't leave. That you are committed to sticking it out. I think the best thing you can give kids is a good marriage -- where you work as a team and share everything. Maybe it's idealistic of me, but i believe it will happen for me one day.

    Anyone else's thoughts?
  • cavecanem10

    Posts: 70

    Nov 28, 2012 5:57 AM GMT
    I definitely want to get to that stage of life as well. I believe in monogamy and finding someone that you truly connect with. I don't think it'll be as idyllic as it's portrayed in the media (Modern Family, New Normal, etc.), but I do think it's going to be awesome, especially with the right man!
  • matthieu17

    Posts: 101

    Nov 28, 2012 6:02 AM GMT
    Strangely enough I can see myself with kids before I could see myself getting married.

    Perhaps if I were dating or in a relationship it would be easier to envision. It's taken me a while to realize exactly how meaningful mentoring, teaching, and being around kids has been an important aspect of my life -- and how much I'd like to have a family one day.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 28, 2012 6:15 AM GMT
    matthieu17 saidStrangely enough I can see myself with kids before I could see myself getting married.

    Perhaps if I were dating or in a relationship it would be easier to envision. It's taken me a while to realize exactly how meaningful mentoring, teaching, and being around kids has been an important aspect of my life -- and how much I'd like to have a family one day.


    Actually this. I have found that I like kids, but I'm around adults 99% of the time.
  • reptile18

    Posts: 199

    Nov 28, 2012 7:18 AM GMT
    Maybe... Maybe in fifty years or so... There's a lot I want to do in life and I feel like a *real* relationship with kids would tie me down too much. But I also don't think I have what it takes to take care of children -- I mean, I'm sort of a child myself...
  • pharmstudent

    Posts: 162

    Nov 28, 2012 7:42 AM GMT
    Marriage is kinda overrated- even straight marriage has a 40% success. People are living longer, healthier, and not to mention hotter.
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    Nov 28, 2012 7:45 AM GMT
    I for one don't really see the attraction to wanting a "carefree" life. By that, I mean: going out to clubs, not having to commit yourself to any one thing, etc.

    I'm 21, I like the idea of getting married a lot, and then having kids a few years down the road. Marriage for me is not just a title, or commitment, but it is something that I think will make me live a complete, happy life. Looking back on my childhood, I loved seeing my parents married, and thinking about everything they did for/with me as a kid make me happy. It makes me want to be able to have my own stories similar to theirs.
  • barriehomeboy

    Posts: 2475

    Nov 28, 2012 7:49 AM GMT
    This is where the thread goes all to hell. Many of the guys I played with were married with kids, or divorced with kids. They all still love the kids and I hope they are part of their lives. Shit happens when gay guys pretend to be straight to make their parents happy. More shit happens when bi guys, who outnumber us 2 to 1 cross the fence.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 28, 2012 7:50 AM GMT
    I don't see me getting married cause that is not in my hands.
    But I definitely see myself with a kid icon_smile.gif
    Planning to start working on it soon. (Adoptions for single men take time here)
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 28, 2012 7:57 AM GMT
    I personally do not like kids so much but I do have a four year old daughter with my lesbian friend. She and her partner are quite possibly the most loving parents a child could have. I was honored when they asked me if I could help them conceive and I had the chance to pass my genes on to another generation.

    Marriage has been tarnished but finding a loving partner that can change quick.