NARCISSISTS!!

  • ChilaxinJOCK0...

    Posts: 1513

    Nov 27, 2012 3:29 AM GMT
    why are so many gay men so damn narcissitic!? uggggggh just be chill & down to earth! I dont mind a few self centered traits here n there, but I feel like its an epidemic these days! (sunday night rant) icon_eek.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Nov 27, 2012 4:09 AM GMT
    it's not just gay people

    Narcissism is everywhere and in everyone.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Nov 27, 2012 4:14 AM GMT
    ChilaxinJOCK09 said (sunday night rant) icon_eek.gif


    Is it still Sunday??? icon_confused.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Nov 27, 2012 4:16 AM GMT
    Its more of a male thing and less of a gay thing. You'd find straight men who are even worse.
  • kevmoran

    Posts: 1543

    Nov 27, 2012 4:16 AM GMT
    The ultimate in narcissism is literally wanting to fuck yourself so...
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Nov 27, 2012 4:24 AM GMT
    Let them be narcissistic. . .

    Narcissists are usually antisocial, Materialistic, they believe they're entitled, and they'll probably never have a good relationship because of this. . .

    In the long run, they're only hurting themselves with this behavior.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Nov 27, 2012 4:39 AM GMT
    What an interesting and tackling dilemma. I've been solving this puzzle slowly but surely; it's the deepest of all egocentricities. I say that apprehensively though because denial can be extremely powerful.

    For me there's a difference between self-centered and self-absorbed. Self-centered we all are, and the solution is just do some sort of service. Problem solved.
    My self-absorption, on the other hand, kept me examining every aspect of my life like a sifter. I was so consumed with thinking that I'm just so incredibly interesting and everyone wants to know about me that I completely lost the joy in being just one tiny piece of this world. It ran deeper than self-centeredness because I wasn't just thinking that it's about me, I was making it all about me.

    That meant causing attention, good or bad. It was something to chase and something to run from. There was no stillness.

    As I became awakened to this narcissism, it got uncomfortable. It got painful, and no creature likes to feel pain. Persistence is siting through the pain to find the fear underneath. When I did that, I kicked and screamed but miracles happened.

    Many have not a clue that they are narcissistic, but not to worry they will end up lonely chasing the same thing for decades: their fear of not being special.
  • MikeW

    Posts: 6061

    Nov 27, 2012 5:05 AM GMT
    I work out at a gym on campus so most of the guys there are college age. Some of them may be gay but most of them aren't, I assume.

    I see guys checking themselves out in the mirrors all the time. I don't mean just checking their form, I mean posing for themselves and flexing in the mirrors, lifting their shirts to check out their six pacs (which I Luv ofc icon_razz.gif ), etc. I've been going to gyms off and on for years but it is only recently I've noticed this phenomena.

    SO... I don't think it is just gay guys. I think our culture's perception of 'maleness' has shifted. Forever we've been inundated with the 'ideal' of feminine 'beauty' -- but now there's a big focus on GUYS having to be sexy and hot (regardless of their orientation).

    My 2¢
  • ChilaxinJOCK0...

    Posts: 1513

    Nov 27, 2012 1:01 PM GMT
    lilTanker saidit's not just gay people

    Narcissism is everywhere and in everyone.


    yes, believe me, I KNOW that. I just feel like so many gays Ive attempted to date or met are always just so into themselves, its actually starting to bother me...alot
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Nov 27, 2012 1:08 PM GMT
    It's probably what I hate the most about gay people. They arent just confident. but overly narcissist/not nice human beings.

    At the end of the day, its just about not going on dates with them.
    Its easy to know when you first talk to someone.



  • JackDoyle

    Posts: 706

    Nov 27, 2012 1:08 PM GMT
    MikeW said

    SO... I don't think it is just gay guys. I think our culture's perception of 'maleness' has shifted. Forever we've been inundated with the 'ideal' of feminine 'beauty' -- but now there's a big focus on GUYS having to be sexy and hot (regardless of their orientation).

    My 2¢


    yeah it's all like the Geordie shore and Jersey shore type guys, it's impossible to tell nowadays who's gay and who's straight haha they're all obsessed with the gym and tanning and fucking v neck t-shirts
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Nov 27, 2012 1:16 PM GMT
    The type you continually attract says moar about you than it does them...

    icon_wink.gificon_wink.gificon_wink.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Nov 28, 2012 1:30 AM GMT
    The gym is the best place to be a narcissist, exhibitionist, AND voyeur all at the same time. It's a blast!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Nov 28, 2012 1:34 AM GMT
    Because gay people suffer so much they turn evil...............only those who are enlightened will shine out with kindness.
  • Medjai

    Posts: 2671

    Nov 28, 2012 1:40 AM GMT
    kevmoran saidThe ultimate in narcissism is literally wanting to fuck yourself so...


    I would fuck a clone of myself.

    To answer the OP, it's because I'm better than everyone else.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Nov 28, 2012 1:45 AM GMT
    Dude,

    Maybe you need to look for gay Mates in different places. Gay sporting and social clubs can have a bigger mix of guys, from all backgrounds. There is a leather bar here in Melbourne and while some of the Dudes are a bit scary, they are much more down to earth and don't take their looks so seriously. Maybe try a new club or bar/venue. Good luck!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Nov 28, 2012 1:47 AM GMT
    Genuinity saidBecause gay people suffer so much they turn evil...............only those who are enlightened will shine out with kindness.

    This
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Nov 28, 2012 1:50 AM GMT
    do you think it could be a result of their insecurity? or a desire to impress you? also, there is something to be said for the fine line between conceited and confident. I would rather be conceited than not have any self confidence. Lesser of two evils maybe?

    (side bar: I'm not conceited, I'm just honest...jk haha)
  • calibro

    Posts: 8888

    Nov 28, 2012 1:53 AM GMT
    because i'm awesome and you're jealous
  • onefortified

    Posts: 1630

    Nov 28, 2012 2:00 AM GMT
    MikeW saidI work out at a gym on campus so most of the guys there are college age. Some of them may be gay but most of them aren't, I assume.

    I see guys checking themselves out in the mirrors all the time. I don't mean just checking their form, I mean posing for themselves and flexing in the mirrors, lifting their shirts to check out their six pacs (which I Luv ofc icon_razz.gif ), etc. I've been going to gyms off and on for years but it is only recently I've noticed this phenomena.

    SO... I don't think it is just gay guys. I think our culture's perception of 'maleness' has shifted. Forever we've been inundated with the 'ideal' of feminine 'beauty' -- but now there's a big focus on GUYS having to be sexy and hot (regardless of their orientation).

    My 2¢


    Come to think of it I never used to look at myself in the mirror so much until I started working out. Not saying i'm a narcissist. I think it's really easy for narcissism to stem from working out, especially as you become increasingly addicted to it.
  • ChilaxinJOCK0...

    Posts: 1513

    Nov 28, 2012 12:23 PM GMT
    Cash saidThe type you continually attract says moar about you than it does them...

    icon_wink.gificon_wink.gificon_wink.gif


    hmmm, so what could it mean?
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Nov 28, 2012 2:31 PM GMT
    I'm actually pretty much okay with narcissism at least until it turns clinical.

    I don't see the harm in people simply enjoying themselves and I often get a kick out of seeing them having fun with it. Reminds me of my youth and especially of my best bi bud who loved attention and he knew how to get it when he wanted it. He was beautiful to watch on the dance floor.

    Though some do make a cartoon of themselves, generally, I think it good that people find themselves beautiful and interesting and especially when they share of themselves freely such that a conversation with them is not me pulling teeth. Why should I have to direct both my conversation and theirs? I prefer for them to participate actively.

    I'm not much for asking people about themselves unless it's a continuing story about which I'm curious and haven 't had a recent update. I much prefer for the other person to freely share with me what they want, to know and trust me well enough to tell me their life story. I find people fascinating, all the many points of view, the different experiences, the ways people perceive and understand, the varied timing of their experiences: the individual combinations are endless.

    The aspect of narcissism that I'm not into of course is when people are only into themselves. Not the part time narcissists but the full timers. The true ones who aren't really giving unless they're getting, who only give to get, those who can't empathize with others, the braggards. I often just click them on ignore but sometimes they get into your life. They can be sneaky. And they'll hurt you if you don't watch out.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Nov 28, 2012 2:34 PM GMT
    narcissism/ insecurity seem to be the two most common tragic flaws i see and all too ofter they are related in some way. I notice guys that are really into themselves are compensating for something they lack or some major insecurity deep down.

    The funny thing is that there are guys attracted to cocky narcissists..I personally find these types to be obnoxious.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Nov 28, 2012 2:37 PM GMT
    because many have been through traumatic events in their lifetime and many have never been to therapy.
  • TonyD

    Posts: 168

    Nov 28, 2012 2:50 PM GMT
    ChilaxinJOCK09 said
    Cash saidThe type you continually attract says moar about you than it does them...

    icon_wink.gificon_wink.gificon_wink.gif


    hmmm, so what could it mean?


    Chances are, attracted to (overly) masculine looking guys can tend
    to be difficult.
    Many of them can be geared toward narcissism to a degree that is unworkable. It's VERY difficult to be gay and find a mate. It takes time to know what will work in a relationship and chances are, if you're young and inexperienced, the sexual attraction has very little to WHST is needed in a relationship.
    The solution: date and find out what works for you, regarding behavior and not appearance.