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I know it is a topic we've covered before, at least indirectly. I have my own 4 bedroom home, I live alone and I've often thought it would be wise to have a roommate.. to help with expenses (not that its critical, but it does help) and for security. I have a friend in Kansas City who has had differing roommates for years with few issues.

I had the place built 8 years ago, tend to think of my home as my santuary at times. I can see the postives, but I can also see some real issues. Just wanted to hear about your own experiences, both good and bad. Are there any RJ members, like my KC friend, that really advocate a roommate scene?

So clearly, what you are looking for is some affirmation and support for moving in some young bucks for eye candy and perhaps a little extracurricular activity

Having a nice roommate is great. I'm lucky to have fanstatic roommates so far. The last two actually became my best friends, and they always stay at my place whenever they're in town visiting. However, you have to realize that there is no such thing as a perfect roommate. There's always something that you don't like about someone, but if it's minor thing, then you can try to move past it. Just like any kind of relationship - compromising plays a big role here.

AMoonHawk saidSo clearly, what you are looking for is some affirmation and support for moving in some young bucks for eye candy and perhaps a little extracurricular activity

Um, no.. I don't need to move in someone for that and I didn't specify whether it be a man or woman.. get real.

Csrobbie2000 saidHaving a nice roommate is great. I'm lucky to have fanstatic roommates so far. The last two actually became my best friends, and they always stay at my place whenever they're in town visiting. However, you have to realize that there is no such thing as a perfect roommate. There's always something that you don't like about someone, but if it's minor thing, then you can try to move past it. Just like any kind of relationship - compromising plays a big role here.

Some good points. My friend in KC said he advertised on Craigslist and did some interviews. The woman who lives at his residence (he owns a house as well) has complete "house priveleges". He swears by it, but I just found that a mistake could be a mess. Thanks for that input.

You're single?!?!

^^ haahaha

Well you should have a Panic Room for at least


aww look how virgin was Kristen Stewart...

I wouldn't want to live alone at this point in my life, and I am not at a time where I would be interested in moving in with a guy, so I have a roommate. We actually work together too, but we seem to get along really well. We don't cook together all the time, but we do share food and offer our food to each other if one is unsure of what to eat. I think it's great, because I absolutely hate wasting food (I attribute that to my grandfather who grew up in occupied Holland).

If you're not flexible and have things that you can't stand, then I think it's better to live alone. That said, if you like things a certain way, and you are upfront about that a good roommate will respect that. I would suggest that to have a roommate that you don't already know you want to have more than one full bathroom.

From the roommate's perspective: I have moved in with people who own the house in the past, and I find that very awkward. I would prefer that we be equals in the the household.

If you have different schedules and they're dog people they'd be perfect for any present and future beagles!

I personally find many more disadvantages than advantages to having a roommate, but privacy and personal space have always been incredibly high priorities for me. I'm a control freak, so living alone is the only way I can stay sane and not be tempted to murder someone for fucking up my living space.

eagermuscle saidIf you have different schedules and they're dog people they'd be perfect for any present and future beagles!

+1
Any potential roommate would have to like dogs and my beagles might be a little issue.. they'd think they have a new person to sleep with at night.
Some people might not find that inviting..lol

nicodegallo saidI personally find many more disadvantages than advantages to having a roommate, but privacy and personal space have always been incredibly high priorities for me. I'm a control freak, so living alone is the only way I can stay sane and not be tempted to murder someone for fucking up my living space.

What are you going to do when you find love and want to live together?

Advantages would include: Saving money, security (someone being there), if you need to go out someone can look after your pets, you can possibly make a new friend.

Disadvantages would be: Stranger coming to stay in your house, may not pay bills on time, end up hating each other.

I personally have had 4 roommates in my life 2 were horrible and 2 were fine. The 2 who were horrible and made my life hell, had major issues and were finding ways to push their problems away from themselves and on to other people. My first roommate actually posted on facebook how he wanted to kill me...My school said it was a harmless prank until I was about to get the police involved. (Fast forward 6 years later, he writes me a letter apologizing, saying he was realizing he was gay and was in serious denial about it). The second roommate was a girl, she just didn't want to pay bills. We all agreed on what the utilities were like and how we would split them, in writing and she just didnt want to pay....turned out she was an alcoholic...when she moved out we found 213 Bacardi bottles where her bed used to be...know we know were the money went to...

My other two roommates were fine, we got along great, hung out but also gave each other personal space. (It was actually another guy who I had a lot in common with and another girl who was just a chill chick)

My recommendation to you is to interview and do a credit and background check. This is your home and you are well within your legal grounds. I would also say that they should get letters of recommendation from their bosses. It will prove they have jobs and are responsible. Full house privileges is up to you, but I would say no, until you have lived with them a certain amount of time and can trust them. Also everything needs to be agreed in WRITING, so it is legally binding. As well as put in there the cases with bringing people over and staying there over night and such. (Thats a big one people don't think about).

not_superman said

nicodegallo saidI personally find many more disadvantages than advantages to having a roommate, but privacy and personal space have always been incredibly high priorities for me. I'm a control freak, so living alone is the only way I can stay sane and not be tempted to murder someone for fucking up my living space.

What are you going to do when you find love and want to live together?

I personally don't expect it to happen. I'm quite realistic with myself, lol.

But I suppose I'll cross that bridge when I get to it. You never know.

I think it depends on your personality. I don't know if I could ever live alone, I get too scared and sometimes I just need some cuddles.

But with the fun and security comes more stress. Especially in your situation where you're the landlord, you might have to force the rent out of them and cause strain, not to mention with multiple roommates you'll have different living styles, cleaning (or lack of), and sleeping/working times.

But good luck!

har19 said^^ haahaha

Well you should have a Panic Room for at least


aww look how virgin was Kristen Stewart...

What movie is this from?

HndsmKansan said

eagermuscle saidIf you have different schedules and they're dog people they'd be perfect for any present and future beagles!

+1
Any potential roommate would have to like dogs and my beagles might be a little issue.. they'd think they have a new person to sleep with at night.
Some people might not find that inviting..lol

I would love that. I would love to have dogs that I can walk and play with etc., but I don't know where I will be in 2 years time, so I can't commit to having pets of my own.

I have a 3 bedroom house. Live alone. No BF. So in the meantime having roommates keeps me company. One is only here for work 6 nights a month. It's always nice to be able to talk to people, get support and make jokes. But depends on your personality. The downsides. You get weird habits like whistling tunes, making weird noises at 11 at night, leaving doors and windows open. But the money every month makes up for some of that. I also have a straight roommate that is really cool and he likes to exchange hugs which is a bonus.

kevmoran said

har19 said^^ haahaha

Well you should have a Panic Room for at least


aww look how virgin was Kristen Stewart...

What movie is this from?

Advantages-
Cuts down on some of the cost of living somewhere
If they are worth anything helps keep the place up
Disadvantages-
Never know when they will be home or not
Their choice of friends might be less desirable.

If you decide to have one - always run a credit and background check. Also ask for at least 2 preferences. You also need to be clear about a few rules such as I'm ok with having guests over every now and then, but definately not often, etc. Funny, one guy who is the host of that game show Repo Game (very muscular black guy) came to look at the place, but as soon as he asked if it's ok to bring a girl home sometimes, I crossed him off the list.

I own my town house, and it's a two story with 2 master bedrooms, a loft and separate entrances, so I have my privacy still. Not to mention having an extra $1200 a month is always great especially in this economy.

Pros
- they pay rent (woo hoo extra money)
- you have someone to talk to
- they can house sit/dog sit if needed
- may make a great new friend in the process
- maybe they can help with household chores (cleaning, lawn, laundry etc...)
Cons
- you dont know what kind of company they keep (friends etc..)
- they might steal your shit
- they might not respect your space (messy etc...)
- they may not be very reliable (if you need them to do something for you)
- they might be real bitchy, to where if you ask them to do something its like the end of the fucking world or something.
- you might date them (if they're gay) and then things dont work out and then there is that kind of awkward thing between you guys
- she (if its a girl) might try to turn you straight or at least bi
- they might not like your style (taste in music etc...) and talk all kinds of shit about why you should not listen to or like (whatever) and you'll be sitting there thinking to yourself ".....................just who the fuck does this person think they are?"
- ask to borrow your shit or worse just assume they can use your shit without asking you

Unless paying my mortgage or rent depended on it I'd rather live alone. I want absolute control over any music, the TV, décor, and the parking situation. So no I'm not a very good roommate.

HK, you're an extreme neat freak. Would you be able to live with a normal people?

Advantages:
1. Easier to save a few extra bucks each month.
2. See #11 in "Disadvantages."

Disadvantages:
1. No more privacy.
2. No more "dinner and movie" dates at home.
3. No more cranking up the volume on fun songs.
4. The remote is never where you put it.
5. The new roll of toilet paper is loaded "under" - if it's even loaded at all.
6. Clean dishes before work magically become dirty after work.
7. Groceries mysteriously disappear.
8. Those that don't disappear go bad and stink up the fridge.
9. Pubes in the kitchen sink where he shaved for a hookup.
10. That grindr hookup he had while you were at work ended up breaking in two weeks later and robbing you blind.
11. Because of #10, the "Advantages" section loses all value.