How do you let people at work know you're gay?

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 30, 2012 6:56 PM GMT
    I've always wondered about this. Most of the jobs I've had no one either ever knew because at the time I felt desperate to hide and hadn't come to term with it. The one time I did let others know on the sly I was fired like a month later. I have another job I'm up for and I find out today if I get it. I'm getting tired of watching everything I say and how I move and who picks me up from work because I'm afraid of losing my job. I'd like to be open but not showy like everyone else. How would I accomplish this? Does anyone have any experience with this?
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    Nov 30, 2012 7:16 PM GMT
    I'm pretty sure my charm usually is the first clue. If not that, my flowery spring frock will certainly answer most questions.
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    Nov 30, 2012 7:17 PM GMT
    smartmoney saidI'm pretty sure my charm usually is the first clue. If not that, my flowery spring frock will certainly answer most questions.


    Yeah that'll do it.
  • Pontifex

    Posts: 1882

    Nov 30, 2012 7:18 PM GMT
    I leave copies of my amateur porn around the office.
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    Nov 30, 2012 7:23 PM GMT
    MashogaNubianPrince saidI've always wondered about this. Most of the jobs I've had no one either ever knew because at the time I felt desperate to hide and hadn't come to term with it. The one time I did let others know on the sly I was fired like a month later. I have another job I'm up for and I find out today if I get it. I'm getting tired of watching everything I say and how I move and who picks me up from work because I'm afraid of losing my job. I'd like to be open but not showy like everyone else. How would I accomplish this? Does anyone have any experience with this?


    When someone tries something desperately, it will be picked up on like a dog to a scent.

    Watching what and to whom you say things is important.

    Sometimes the world sucks- and I mean that in the bad sense.
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    Nov 30, 2012 7:37 PM GMT
    BuddyinNYC said
    MashogaNubianPrince saidI've always wondered about this. Most of the jobs I've had no one either ever knew because at the time I felt desperate to hide and hadn't come to term with it. The one time I did let others know on the sly I was fired like a month later. I have another job I'm up for and I find out today if I get it. I'm getting tired of watching everything I say and how I move and who picks me up from work because I'm afraid of losing my job. I'd like to be open but not showy like everyone else. How would I accomplish this? Does anyone have any experience with this?


    When someone tries something desperately, it will be picked up on like a dog to a scent.

    Watching what and to whom you say things is important.

    Sometimes the world sucks- and I mean that in the bad sense.


    Well I'm desperate to hide it then cause I wasn't feeling at terms with my sexuality. Now I just don't wanna lose my job.
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    Nov 30, 2012 7:50 PM GMT
    MashogaNubianPrince said
    BuddyinNYC said
    MashogaNubianPrince saidI've always wondered about this. Most of the jobs I've had no one either ever knew because at the time I felt desperate to hide and hadn't come to term with it. The one time I did let others know on the sly I was fired like a month later. I have another job I'm up for and I find out today if I get it. I'm getting tired of watching everything I say and how I move and who picks me up from work because I'm afraid of losing my job. I'd like to be open but not showy like everyone else. How would I accomplish this? Does anyone have any experience with this?


    When someone tries something desperately, it will be picked up on like a dog to a scent.

    Watching what and to whom you say things is important.

    Sometimes the world sucks- and I mean that in the bad sense.


    Well I'm desperate to hide it then cause I wasn't feeling at terms with my sexuality. Now I just don't wanna lose my job.


    "Walk between the raindrops."
    Just relax about it and do the work you're supposed to do. People will see that you're a conscientious and responsible person/worker. You'll learn from this what makes people focus on other peoples' attributes.
  • TheAlchemixt

    Posts: 2294

    Nov 30, 2012 10:07 PM GMT
    Simple, you find the loudest and biggest queen there is at your work place and you fuck him. You fuck that queen good damn it!!! icon_twisted.gif
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    Nov 30, 2012 10:09 PM GMT
    Flirt with Steve from finance.
  • imbrad

    Posts: 377

    Nov 30, 2012 10:10 PM GMT
    I just act the way they do. They gawk and carry on about girls. So i say what i want about guys. No one cares really. I'm generally more prudish than they are so nothing scary really comes out of my mouth
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    Nov 30, 2012 10:11 PM GMT
    TheAlchemixt saidSimple, you find the loudest and biggest queen there is at your work place and you fuck him. You fuck that queen good damn it!!! icon_twisted.gif



    ...- lol...lmao..that is funny..
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 30, 2012 10:17 PM GMT
    Or you could - y'know - be yourself? Not make it a big deal? You don't see anyone else carrying "I'm straight" signs. They ask what kind of girls you like - you say the type that aren't girls and leave it at that. No reason to make a show out of "coming out."
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    Nov 30, 2012 10:18 PM GMT
    Go to work like this

    tumblr_m9kyes1eAC1rf6wdco1_400.gif

    And then invite them to

    tumblr_mcopc0AGdJ1qerpcpo1_500.gif

    I'm pretty sure they'll get it.
  • AMoonHawk

    Posts: 11406

    Nov 30, 2012 10:35 PM GMT
    I find that sometimes the right clothes will say it all

    th?id=I.4959584214451383&pid=15.1
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 30, 2012 10:36 PM GMT
    This is my boyfriend so and so.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 30, 2012 10:37 PM GMT
    Shower with them. The Boner is a dead give away.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 30, 2012 10:41 PM GMT
    I start a forum on the company website titled, "I've got a crush on a hot straight guy I work with."
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 30, 2012 10:55 PM GMT
    Shake your ass in their face, lol. I'm just not responsible for anything that happens after that.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 30, 2012 11:02 PM GMT
    ^^^ Dudez HOT ^^^

    Does that come across as Gay?????
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 30, 2012 11:08 PM GMT
    I come out at work the same way a straight person "comes out". At some point I mention my boyfriend or something like that. No one at my work (college professor) cares (that I know of). And even if they did care, the rest of the college would make them feel like a moron for feeling that way.
  • Karl

    Posts: 5787

    Nov 30, 2012 11:09 PM GMT
    write : "I am Gay" on your back icon_lol.gif
    jk.
    Why we have to let people know we're gay ?
    No need to do that.
  • FRE0

    Posts: 4864

    Nov 30, 2012 11:13 PM GMT
    On the last three jobs I had before I retired, there were always a few coworkers who knew I was gay and it was never an issue. I'll tell you exactly how I came out to one coworker in about 1995.

    Mira had told me that I seemed to be a very reasonable man so she wondered why I wasn't married. That time, I just passed it off without saying very much. A few weeks later, I was working on a Saturday so as not to fall behind on getting the state income tax software updated on time. Mira was working on Saturday also, for the same reason, and we were the only two in the office. When she again asked the question, I decided that it was time to level with her, so I said something like the following:

    "Well, Mira, it's like this. Most people are romantically attracted mainly to the opposite sex. However, some of us find that our romantic interest is limited to the same sex and therefore marriage would not be appropriate."

    She didn't seem to have a problem with it. Later she invited me to have lunch with her, which was probably her way of saying that it's OK. Just by coincidence, a non-gay friend of mine, who knew I was gay, was working for the same company.

    I've had experience with coming out at other companies and there has never been a problem. However, I have never run around announcing it to everyone; I never found a need to. And, when coming out, it should not be done in a way to make it seem to be an issue nor should it be done in a confrontational way. Others should not be put into a position of feeling that they have to respond. Ideally, one should come out in normal conversation and being gay should be treated as a mundane matter that is not controversial.

    Depending on company culture, men may talk about wives or girl friends; woman may talk about husbands or boy friends. If you feel pressured to do so, you can say something like, "My life isn't very interesting right now," and say nothing more about it. But, don't make up stories about boy friends since doing so is deceptive and could make things more difficult at a later date. People will wonder why you don't talk about girl friends; let them wonder until you feel ready to come out.

    It would not be a good idea to come out until you have been working for a company for long enough to establish a reputation as a good worker.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 30, 2012 11:13 PM GMT


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  • Kel_

    Posts: 1360

    Nov 30, 2012 11:16 PM GMT
    "However, I have never run around announcing it to everyone; I never found a need to."

    Thank you.
    Best possible answer and reason.
  • LJay

    Posts: 11612

    Nov 30, 2012 11:21 PM GMT
    When I was working I never felt it necessary. Should I have?

    Even though it was a small office and we all knew a lot about each other, it just never seemed necessary to broadcast being gay. I'd be really shocked if they did not figure it out, but I never felt the need to know their exact details either.

    There is a general strain in my upbringing that says that the personal lives of others are just that.

    Though I do know which of our organization members prefers not to eat giraffe meat, I have never felt the need to bring it to general notice.

    To me, this is not a matter of whether one is out or not, it simply observes decorum at work.

    "You are under hire to this corporation. You have the right to remain silent in certain matters. Anything you say can and will be used against you in the area of personnel relations, either formally or informally...."