Another depressing post

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 05, 2012 12:44 AM GMT
    Sometimes ( most times ?) being gay really sucks , the daily pressures of it and everything... especially if you're not the kind that's confident and charismatic enough to own it completely/

    I'm rambling , but I just wanted to vent. Being gay is effin hard.
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    Dec 05, 2012 6:52 AM GMT
    Chin up- gay men have better sex than straight men. And bigger schlongs too, I think.
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    Dec 05, 2012 7:13 AM GMT
    Nuke%20A%20Gay%20Whale%20For%20Christ%20
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    Dec 05, 2012 8:33 AM GMT
    Aww, quel dommage.
    You are young . You could move to Paris and find happiness there.
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    Dec 05, 2012 8:37 AM GMT
    HikeSwimSkiSF saidAww, quel dommage.
    You are young . You could move to Paris and find happiness there.


    That's what my friend from Paris keeps telling me !! ^^ I'm starting to believe that's true.
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    Dec 05, 2012 9:17 AM GMT
    What kind of daily pressure are you having from being gay? Like dressing nice? lol I'm confused. But on a serious note, why make being gay anything more than being attracted to men rather than women?
  • TheAlchemixt

    Posts: 2294

    Dec 05, 2012 9:25 AM GMT
    Saad22 said
    HikeSwimSkiSF saidAww, quel dommage.
    You are young . You could move to Paris and find happiness there.


    That's what my friend from Paris keeps telling me !! ^^ I'm starting to believe that's true.


    Am I missing something? What's in Paris?
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    Dec 05, 2012 9:31 AM GMT
    Because it's not. I'd like it to be , I mean that's what we all want and ask for , but, clearly, if you want to face the facts as they are , it's not.

    I'm not even talking about the shallow stuff , like keeping up with the standards of the "gay community". I'm talking about living in a society where being gay will never be accepted as something normal , and all the consequences of it.

    How people can make gay jokes to your face assuming that you're straight, how easily it becomes a taboo when you say that you're gay and all the rest of it.


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    Dec 05, 2012 9:32 AM GMT
    TheAlchemixt said
    Saad22 said
    HikeSwimSkiSF saidAww, quel dommage.
    You are young . You could move to Paris and find happiness there.


    That's what my friend from Paris keeps telling me !! ^^ I'm starting to believe that's true.


    Am I missing something? What's in Paris?


    Parisians icon_smile.gif
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    Dec 05, 2012 9:33 AM GMT
    TheAlchemixt said
    Saad22 said
    HikeSwimSkiSF saidAww, quel dommage.
    You are young . You could move to Paris and find happiness there.


    That's what my friend from Paris keeps telling me !! ^^ I'm starting to believe that's true.


    Am I missing something? What's in Paris?
    Life. Excitement! Beaucoup de jeunes hommes.
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    Dec 05, 2012 9:41 AM GMT
    Saad22 saidBecause it's not. I'd like it to be , I mean that's what we all want and ask for , but, clearly, if you want to face the facts as they are , it's not.

    I'm not even talking about the shallow stuff , like keeping up with the standards of the "gay community". I'm talking about living in a society where being gay will never be accepted as something normal , and all the consequences of it.

    How people can make gay jokes to your face assuming that you're straight, how easily it becomes a taboo when you say that you're gay and all the rest of it.
    Yes, that is sad. No comfort, but it would be worse in Italy. Better in Paris, and even better in London for gays.
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    Dec 05, 2012 1:18 PM GMT
    you could consider that if this is your biggest problem in life that you are pretty lucky

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    690.jpg
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 05, 2012 1:31 PM GMT
    Yep, being ag is really fucking hard...especially when I'm groping a guy with a rockin body.

    Oh wait, maybe "being gay" isn't the hard part.
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    Dec 05, 2012 3:36 PM GMT
    Ckfeezy saidWhat kind of daily pressure are you having from being gay? Like dressing nice? lol I'm confused. But on a serious note, why make being gay anything more than being attracted to men rather than women?
    Maybe he's referring to fitting in. Whether you take the insults/abuse directly, people say a heck of a lot of nasty things about gays. Gays are a minority, so you can often feel isolated in your daily life, without really being around a lot of people who understand you.
  • MikemikeMike

    Posts: 6932

    Dec 05, 2012 3:37 PM GMT
    it's not hard at all-cancer is hard being gay isn'ticon_idea.gif
    Count your blessings.
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    Dec 05, 2012 3:57 PM GMT
    MikemikeMike saidit's not hard at all-cancer is hard being gay isn'ticon_idea.gif
    Count your blessings.

    Agreed!
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    Dec 05, 2012 3:59 PM GMT
    Saad22 saidBecause it's not. I'd like it to be , I mean that's what we all want and ask for , but, clearly, if you want to face the facts as they are , it's not.

    I'm not even talking about the shallow stuff , like keeping up with the standards of the "gay community". I'm talking about living in a society where being gay will never be accepted as something normal , and all the consequences of it.

    How people can make gay jokes to your face assuming that you're straight, how easily it becomes a taboo when you say that you're gay and all the rest of it.




    Waves of expanding consciousness roll across this world. Rogue waves overturn the most stable ships. Tsunamis wash away the most remote village while rising oceans flood cities. And we are on the forefront of one of those waves that you experience as crashing onto the shore, sometimes onto rocks, sometimes lapping soft sand.

    What harm can rocks do to waves? We will pound them into sand. Be the wave. Fear not the changing shore. Recede when you must to deeper waters behind you.

    "Nothing in the world is more flexible and yielding than water. yet when it attacks the firm and the strong, none can withstand it, because they have no way to change it. So the flexible overcome the adamant, the yielding overcome the forceful."~~Tao Te Ching
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    Dec 06, 2012 12:18 AM GMT
    Oh my god you guys , come ooon.

    Before even writing this thread, I knew this stuff about first world problems was going to come up. I'm sorry but it's a Bullsh*t argument.

    Yes people suffer in the world, yes suffering isn't a good thing , but does that mean that any feeling of inadequacy , should be disregarded as a caprice ?

    Not only is that completely irrelevant, it's harmful. It's the same reasoning that causes people to say depression isn't a valid condition.
    It's also selfish to consider that everyone should feel the way you do because you have found a way to make it through. You'd be more helpful if you shared some constructive advice about how you got there rather than try to discredit people who express those type of feelings.

    I'm sorry if I'm being harsh but it's just I've read this argument over and over and over again, it's driving me nuts, especially coming from people who are going through the same challenges !!!

    Now , it is nice to know, that no matter what I go through, I will have a comfortable bed, a warm meal at night when I come home. It's more than a lot of people can hope for. I'm aware of that,ok maybe I am not completely aware of it, I've never had to live in those conditions. But I try not to take for granted everything that I've got. But please , just because I find that there is something distressing and wrong with my life, it doesn't mean I disregard all the good things that I have. We all strive to make our lives better, and considering that fulfilling our basic needs is the key to happiness , is like completely ignoring the highs and lows, the mechanisms of the human mind.

    Also, I come from Morocco, which is not exactly a first world country.
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    Dec 06, 2012 12:19 AM GMT
    theantijock said
    Saad22 saidBecause it's not. I'd like it to be , I mean that's what we all want and ask for , but, clearly, if you want to face the facts as they are , it's not.

    I'm not even talking about the shallow stuff , like keeping up with the standards of the "gay community". I'm talking about living in a society where being gay will never be accepted as something normal , and all the consequences of it.

    How people can make gay jokes to your face assuming that you're straight, how easily it becomes a taboo when you say that you're gay and all the rest of it.




    Waves of expanding consciousness roll across this world. Rogue waves overturn the most stable ships. Tsunamis wash away the most remote village while rising oceans flood cities. And we are on the forefront of one of those waves that you experience as crashing onto the shore, sometimes onto rocks, sometimes lapping soft sand.

    What harm can rocks do to waves? We will pound them into sand. Be the wave. Fear not the changing shore. Recede when you must to deeper waters behind you.

    "Nothing in the world is more flexible and yielding than water. yet when it attacks the firm and the strong, none can withstand it, because they have no way to change it. So the flexible overcome the adamant, the yielding overcome the forceful."~~Tao Te Ching



    Thanks a lot, very inspiring and beautiful message
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    Dec 06, 2012 2:20 AM GMT
    @Saad: Some of the guys on this RJ site are very harsh, critical, or flippant. Some get a kick out of sometimes putting another guy down with cutting or flippant remark. It makes them feel superior, or they have won. Most of us are not like that. Most of the guys on here are American, and have little idea of what French gay life might be like. I have only seen posts on this website from a few French guys. I hope that things will go better for you. When I suggested you might consider moving to Paris, you had not revealed that you were originally from Morocco. Do you perceive that you experience discrimination because you were originally from Morocco? Or is this not a problem in Nice? I really do not know Nice - I have only been there for less than a week once.
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    Dec 06, 2012 2:35 AM GMT
    Saad, I know exactly what you mean. I fully understand what you're talking about.. some people will not empathize with the culture/traditions of different countries around the world and how being gay isn't something small, it can be a difficult thing to deal with. So again, I get what you're saying.. my heat goes out to you icon_neutral.gif
  • MikePhilPerez

    Posts: 4357

    Dec 06, 2012 2:50 AM GMT
    Saad22 saidlike keeping up with the standards of the "gay community".




    What standards are they?
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    Dec 06, 2012 3:49 AM GMT
    pasfu31 said

    690.jpg

    Hahaha nailed it
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    Dec 06, 2012 4:25 PM GMT
    Saad22 saidThanks a lot, very inspiring and beautiful message


    You're welcome man. And we're gonna win this. It may not be in my generation or yours. But our little truth is gonna keep burning through their mounds of bullshit.

    Keep in mind that it was only 500 years ago that they admitted to the earth revolving around the sun. They're not very bright; slow to learn. So whenever you are feeling down about it just Nuke a Gay Whale for Christ. I wore that button in my college years in the 70s. It shows how ridiculous is the world. Keep that truth in mind: they're the crazy ones, not us.

    Their life is not yours, man. Just live yours. You can view them as attacking, and sometimes that view is unavoidable, but mostly you can view them as entertaining. It's like watching the village idiot only in our case the village is an idiot. You're plenty smart and strong enough to do that.

    Just like you did it here when...

    Saad22 said...it is nice to know, that no matter what I go through, I will have a comfortable bed, a warm meal at night when I come home. It's more than a lot of people can hope for. I'm aware of that,ok maybe I am not completely aware of it, I've never had to live in those conditions. But I try not to take for granted everything that I've got. But please , just because I find that there is something distressing and wrong with my life, it doesn't mean I disregard all the good things that I have. We all strive to make our lives better, and considering that fulfilling our basic needs is the key to happiness , is like completely ignoring the highs and lows, the mechanisms of the human mind....


    ...because you've an excellent understanding and offer a good critique of #firstworldproblem bullshit. On the one hand it's cute and convenient to say, well, that's not really a problem because of x & y elsewhere. But it also is a little silly to relate on a 1:1 scale first/third world problems. If you look at Nobel Laureates per country per capita, http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_countries_by_Nobel_laureates_per_capita you'll notice not a lot of scientific awards handed out in Biafra. They were a little too busy finding food to bother with the evolution of their thoughts.

    I'm just waiting for someone to mention "What do you mean you think you have a weight problem? The people on the moon or on Mars don't have a weight problem. Gravity is such a #firstworldissue!"

    Meanwhile, in that starving third world, if a mother had only enough food for one child to survive and knew intuitively that one of her babies was gay, who would she sacrifice? I doubt we have data but I suspect this not just a 1stworldproblem. Now how entertaining is that?
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    Dec 12, 2012 10:21 PM GMT
    Exactly !