The LINE...

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 19, 2012 3:28 AM GMT
    When you are playing with your BF, Husband or latest hook-up, What is the line that separates "LOVE" from "ABUSE", "Pain" from "Fun", etc.
    Are bruises, scrapes, scratches, bite marks or bright red hand prints...."FUN" or too far?.....some like to play rough, some want soft caresses and kisses.....whats your line?

    I may have given away some of my answer already...icon_redface.gif
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    Dec 19, 2012 3:30 AM GMT
    Until he starts choking me everything is cool and even then I like having jaw hooked and a little gagging.
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    Dec 19, 2012 4:36 AM GMT
    Unless it was unintentional and completely by accident, I don't think bruises or scrapes are okay (Unless it was like accidentally falling off the bed). Scratches are fine (unless there is blood), bite marks are okay (again, unless there is blood and it doesn't hurt for long) and red hand prints are fine.

    I'm a virgin so I obviously don't know what I'm okay with, but I understand how during a heated session things can get a little rough. I don't know about all gay guys, but I think most of us are okay with getting "down and dirty" sometimes.
  • dfrourke

    Posts: 1062

    Dec 19, 2012 7:36 AM GMT
    Somehow I believe the answer to the OPs question is incredibly personal, no? And if you are experiencing things and then asking if it went to far...trust your gut...it probably went to far...

    ...and if rough play is in your relationship, may I suggest using a safe word so you both know when it may have gone a bit over the edge...(typically "no" and "stop" are bad safe words because they can feed a fantasy)

    Hope you heal fast.

    - David icon_neutral.gif
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    Dec 19, 2012 7:40 AM GMT
    I woken up the next morning pretty beat up, dark marks and bruises all up and down my body, substantial bite marks, sore all over.

    Just how I like it.
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    Dec 19, 2012 7:41 AM GMT
    dfrourke said

    ...and if rough play is in your relationship, may I suggest using a safe word so you both know when it may have gone a bit over the edge...(typically "no" and "stop" are bad safe words because they can feed a fantasy)

    />


    rofl speaking of last time I tried to use a safe word during because it was getting a little intense and he's like "sorry we didn't disclose any safe words beforehand and now it's too late icon_biggrin.gif "

    It was awesome! =D
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    Dec 19, 2012 7:54 AM GMT
    dfrourke saidSomehow I believe the answer to the OPs question is incredibly personal, no? And if you are experiencing things and then asking if it went to far...trust your gut...it probably went to far...

    ...and if rough play is in your relationship, may I suggest using a safe word so you both know when it may have gone a bit over the edge...(typically "no" and "stop" are bad safe words because they can feed a fantasy)

    Hope you heal fast.

    - David icon_neutral.gif


    That is a good idea. Or maybe make it so that tthere's a signal of some sort of your hands are free but you can't talk.
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    Dec 19, 2012 6:23 PM GMT
    Seriously, the next guy who leaves bite marks on me is going to loose some teeth.

    The only problem is, I never notice until the next day... icon_redface.gif
  • MidwesternKid

    Posts: 1167

    Dec 19, 2012 8:06 PM GMT
    For me, whether its a boyfriend or a hook up, Im a very passionate in bed. My concern about this "Line" is that my latest hook up will fall in love with me.
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    Dec 19, 2012 8:38 PM GMT
    Pain can be fun. Bruises, scrapes, and poke marks from fingernails can be fun. Bite marks are too much, though.

    BTW, I just looked in the mirror a little while ago and noticed bruises, scrapes, and fingernail poke marks from last night's drunken sexy fun time. icon_lol.gif
  • Pontifex

    Posts: 1882

    Dec 19, 2012 8:41 PM GMT
    Depends on the guy. I tend to show my dominance through strength rather than creating actual trauma though ;-)
  • HottJoe

    Posts: 21366

    Dec 19, 2012 8:44 PM GMT
    Pontifex saidDepends on the guy. I tend to show my dominance through strength rather than creating actual trauma though ;-)


    Sounds perfect!icon_razz.gif
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    Dec 19, 2012 8:52 PM GMT
    tumblr_mahautKp4T1qk8x4l.gif
  • swimmer8671

    Posts: 429

    Dec 19, 2012 9:05 PM GMT
    I am always astonished by how many people are into rough or kinky sex... What ever happened to being sweet and passionate without having to bite or hit someone jeez... icon_rolleyes.gif

    I am not afraid to admit I don't like it rough at all.

    A guy bit me once while we were kissing and I was like "The FUCK?"

    Wrestling is fun, spanking/hitting/biting is a big no no for me.
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    Dec 19, 2012 9:08 PM GMT
    Biting is ok with me, just don't break the skin. But I have never had bruises and scratches, that would be a new one for me.
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    Dec 19, 2012 9:18 PM GMT
    well, I come back from sailing with unexplained bruises too
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    Dec 19, 2012 9:45 PM GMT
    dfrourke saidSomehow I believe the answer to the OPs question is incredibly personal, no? And if you are experiencing things and then asking if it went to far...trust your gut...it probably went to far...

    ...and if rough play is in your relationship, may I suggest using a safe word so you both know when it may have gone a bit over the edge...(typically "no" and "stop" are bad safe words because they can feed a fantasy)

    Hope you heal fast.

    - David icon_neutral.gif


    Thats very true. The "line" is subjective.
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    Dec 19, 2012 11:11 PM GMT
    A good spanking is sometime required and never hurt anybody icon_smile.gif Ryan
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    Dec 19, 2012 11:35 PM GMT
    rareone88 saidBiting is ok with me, just don't break the skin.


    Agree.

    In the moment, an ass slap or two is not a bad thing either. I do love to have my nipples played with too - light squeezing and playful biting are a turn on. I have even came across a guy who likes his foreskin CHEWED!icon_eek.gif Even though I was ginger about it and it is not so much of a turn on for me, it definitely got him going.

    Hickey bruises yes, punch bruise no. Accidental scrapes and scratches happen, but I wouldn't want to have that done to me or do that to someone else.

    I, personally, cannot go "extreme".