Need advice... sexual position issue in bedroom...

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    Dec 20, 2012 7:28 PM GMT
    Hey everyone.... My names Alex I'm 20 years old living in the south with my boyfriend of over two years. I work at a health foods store part time and I am very serious about my health. Just a lil background info since i am new to this board. I read posts on here all the time but i juuuust finally got an acount... Looking forward to meeting new friends icon_smile.gif so dooooown to the issue at hand.... ... My boyfriend and I have been together over two years... We moved in together after only a few months of dating but everything is golden when it comes to our relationship, bRESIZED TEXT GOES HEREesides the usual man arguing lol. But my parents love him as much as I do and he is truly part of the family. When it comes to sex I have always been his bottom. I have topped for some bf but I'm more of a bottom for the most part. Besides that natural curiosity for the ass occasionally... lately when we screw I was making my hand around his ass area, just rubbing. Its so obvious he is uncomfortable with it. The first time he just said I'm willing to try that, just not now. So my response is when of course. a few more attempts later and I try the other night. I'm riding him, lubing up his balls, rubbing lower. And once I get to his hole he has a look of disgust. He then says it just doesn't feel good. I don't get it... I can handle his cock anytime he wants but when it comes to a Lil ass rub he's not down. Even while he's inside me. Makes no sense right? When we first started dating he even talked about how he would maybe try bottoming one day... Well its been.over two years... And I'm obviously interested. So should I just keep trying... Move on? Try something else? I really at least want to finger him while he screws me.... That's not too much to ask is it? Thanks yall looking forward to b a frequent of the board... Thanks again...
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    Dec 20, 2012 8:04 PM GMT
    Assuming that your fingernails are trimmed, and things are well lubed...

    He's lying.
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    Dec 20, 2012 8:11 PM GMT
    i dunno dude. if he's not down with gettin his ass rubbed, dont fuckin do it?

    I dont know why you're having an issue with it. Some ppl dont like their asses fucked with. I mean, I wouldn't take it personally.
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    Dec 20, 2012 8:30 PM GMT
    There's something he's not telling you. I don't buy the "just doesn't feel good" response without a "why" explanation. I think you need to have a talk with him and find out his reason(s). If he ignores the subject and walks away, he's hiding something.
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    Dec 20, 2012 9:00 PM GMT
    Erik101 saidThere's something he's not telling you. I don't buy the "just doesn't feel good" response without a "why" explanation. I think you need to have a talk with him and find out his reason(s). If he ignores the subject and walks away, he's hiding something.



    No he wouldn't lie to me... And has led a very privileged life.... Just don't think he can let himself even attempt to try to like it...
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    Dec 20, 2012 9:02 PM GMT
    mindgarden saidAssuming that your fingernails are trimmed, and things are well lubed...

    He's lying.



    Oh no that's not good. Yeah I have no fingernails extending past my finger... And I lubed him alot... Ugh I wonder if its all mental, like he's literally tightening his ass with his mind lol.
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    Dec 20, 2012 9:03 PM GMT
    #1. Awesome screen name. Clive Barker rules.

    #2. It sounds like you have a pretty solid relationship and that's great. Have you talked to him lately about this issue? If he doesn't want anal stimulation then you probably shouldn't force it. Does he like to be rimmed? Maybe you could talk him into moving real slow - like massaging his taint during a blow job. Let him set the rules - no finger penetration, just a massage.

    Good luck!
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    Dec 20, 2012 10:03 PM GMT
    atxd13 said#1. Awesome screen name. Clive Barker rules.

    #2. It sounds like you have a pretty solid relationship and that's great. Have you talked to him lately about this issue? If he doesn't want anal stimulation then you probably shouldn't force it. Does he like to be rimmed? Maybe you could talk him into moving real slow - like massaging his taint during a blow job. Let him set the rules - no finger penetration, just a massage.

    Good luck!



    Hell yeah to another Clive Barker fan here... Ur my favorite already icon_smile.gif and I was barely massaging it the other night when he said it didn't feel good. And it was while he was fucking me lol.... But I am going to bring it up to him when he's drunk tonight.... Hee heee
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    Dec 20, 2012 10:30 PM GMT
    Aww thx! Your bf is a lucky guy. (:

    Maybe you could offer to give him an erotic massage... Reassure him that you're not going to 'go there' but you want to make him feel good all over. Give his booty a good rub down, give him kisses down his back. Tease him a little bit and maybe he will let you go further next time. icon_biggrin.gif
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    Dec 21, 2012 12:30 AM GMT
    If he's not into it I wouldn't push the issue. Unless that's a deal breaker for you of course. If he's really curious about trying it like he said then he'll come around the idea on his own time.
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    Dec 24, 2012 9:33 PM GMT
    waterloonicetop saidHandcuffs are wonderful things, 4 of them even better.




    Haha what r u proposing I handcuff him while asleep?
  • jackthejock

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    Dec 24, 2012 11:09 PM GMT
    If you believe he is interested than get him a set of training butt plugs. You can usually get a set of 3 for like $15 on amazon and usually the smallest one is about the size of two finers. Give it to him and tell him to try using it by himself when he is alone and masterbating to porn he likes. My recent ex had never bottomed before me and we got him a little set it took him over a month to work up the the big size (which is a little wider than my cock but smaller than his). Then after he is comfortable see if he'll let you use the toys on him and then a little later he should feel secure enough to let you top. Go slower than what is actualy ideal for you and if you don't get to cum the first couple of times don't act disappointed, tell him it was hot for you and you hope it felt good for him.

    There are two rings in the anus the outer one we have control over the inner one we don't, but they are muscles and like any muscle they can be worked out. But it is a very personal and intimate part of us so that's why having him explore on his own first will make it easier. Done shame, badger, pressure or push him into it, he is very young and this is just a new part of his sexual awakening.
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    Dec 25, 2012 12:18 AM GMT
    Just a thought.............is there a chance - a slim chance that your b.f. was molested back there in his past? Hope not. Just wondering if that could be a reason for his reticence? Other than that - could it be possible that he doesn't feel clean enough to let you go probing there? Or a third question: Could it be that he once had a painful experience with a previous guy who was not patient, or lubed up - going slowly at first? Talk with him and see if you can get him to come around - and I agree that trying the smaller but plugs at first - after a good cleaning in the shower would be a good idea. Otherwise, he is missing so much.