What Would You Have Done Differently?

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 21, 2012 2:26 AM GMT
    Not sure if this has been done before. Recently I've been thinking about some of the mistakes I've made in my last relationship. Like not spending enough time with him, not being thoughtful and considerate at times etc. So what things would you do differently knowing what you know now?
  • IAmTheOneWhoK...

    Posts: 154

    Dec 21, 2012 3:53 AM GMT
    Not waste my time with him in the first place.
  • mmnt

    Posts: 69

    Dec 21, 2012 4:23 AM GMT
    Wish I knew he was playing game. I feel I was bitten quite badly. Shame on me!!!
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    Dec 21, 2012 4:48 AM GMT
    Not mention his ex who I "knew" in high school (and I said was a prick) or mock his volunteer job. icon_neutral.gif

    Or maybe go to that party he invited me to....
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    Dec 21, 2012 5:09 AM GMT
    Not feeding his ego.

    And not making him feel like he's all that special when you don't get the same treatment from him.
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    Dec 21, 2012 5:27 AM GMT
    IAmTheOneWhoKnocks saidNot waste my time with him in the first place.



    ^^^^This^^^^
  • Jojo_Blu

    Posts: 26

    Dec 21, 2012 5:38 AM GMT
    I wouldn't have tried to change myself. And I won't ever again.
  • mybud

    Posts: 11821

    Dec 21, 2012 5:48 AM GMT
    I would have gave less.... and kept more for myself.........
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 21, 2012 5:55 AM GMT
    Get to know his personality more before committing to a relationship. Didn't realize until 2 months into the relationship on how needy he was.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 21, 2012 8:01 AM GMT
    Mentally moved on .....I was trapped in a funk for way too long
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 21, 2012 8:03 AM GMT
    I would of caught on that he wasn't being honest about himself and I would of not let myself fall as hard as I did.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 21, 2012 8:08 AM GMT
    I gave so much in some of my past relationship, now I put myself first and became a bit more selfish (a hard thing to admit) and I just don't put up with silly stupid shit from anyone anymore. I learned from most of my mistakes, that's how you grow as a person.
  • dfrourke

    Posts: 1062

    Dec 21, 2012 8:23 AM GMT
    lol...great question...

    1. Listened more rather than try to find time to always speak my mind
    2. Nurtured my own needs outside of the relationship with friends and family so I didn't "put most of my social time in the relationship only"
    3. Have more conversations rather than confrontations.

    I'm sure there are more...

    - David icon_wink.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 21, 2012 8:28 AM GMT
    Tmmn saidWish I knew he was playing game. I feel I was bitten quite badly. Shame on me!!!


    I'm in the same boat as you man. Ditto.
  • nomadfornow

    Posts: 1069

    Dec 21, 2012 8:36 AM GMT
    I would have listened to my inner voice of reason. I would have paid attention to all the red flags that were popping up, telling me, "This is all wrong." I would have maintained my self respect. I would have never allowed him to walk through my door again after I walked away from him the first time. Hard lessons, but immensely valuable ones. You can bet I'll remember them, should I ever have another chance at love.
  • DKnight

    Posts: 152

    Dec 21, 2012 8:45 AM GMT
    Trust him more. Short but important!
  • spacemagic

    Posts: 520

    Dec 21, 2012 8:49 AM GMT
    Should've spoken up more about how I felt.
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    Dec 21, 2012 9:19 AM GMT
    Would've

    1. Went on that spontaneous trip to SF after knowing each other for only a week.

    2. Swam in that pool.

    3. Rode on that motorcycle.

    4. Danced a bit longer.

    However, I'd do it all again.
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    Dec 21, 2012 10:11 AM GMT
    IAmTheOneWhoKnocks saidNot waste my time with him in the first place.


    THIS!!!!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 21, 2012 10:19 AM GMT
    I would have had more self respect.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 21, 2012 12:45 PM GMT
    "While man blames another for causing him harm, the wise man first takes himself to task." -Hazrat Khan

    I wouldn't have done anything differently because I know today I can take full responsibility for my own un-health. I wouldn't have been in a relationship that made me feel like shit if I didn't love feeling like shit.

    What's different today is me. I don't have to blame others for my actions, past or present. I wouldn't even consider getting involved in the unhealthy relationships that I've had in the past if I were faced with them today.
  • winwin

    Posts: 264

    Dec 21, 2012 1:38 PM GMT
    I should have known better before making the commitment.
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    Dec 21, 2012 2:54 PM GMT

    Let's see.....*thinks back to time before Bill*....

    I should have simply taken the guys at face value when they said,
    " I'm really fucked up, you know." O.o icon_lol.gif

    It would have saved me from feeling like:



  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 21, 2012 3:06 PM GMT
    Smoked more pot. Wait, do I have the wrong post?
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 21, 2012 3:43 PM GMT
    1) Let myself Really Love him and not hold back.
    2) Communicate more
    3) Not have opened up the relationship
    I don't regret the mistakes I've made. I look at them and learn from them. The good and bad have made me the person I am today and I'm better for it. icon_wink.gif