Awkward questions at Xmas Dinner

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    Dec 26, 2012 4:34 AM GMT
    Everybody is eating and the dreaded question is asked "So, do you have a girlfriend?" ...."No"...silence. Eventually they stop asking right? I just need to get the balls and come out.
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    Dec 26, 2012 4:42 AM GMT
    It gets better when you invite your first boyfriend to Christmas Dinner.

    Then, they stop asking.
  • Amira

    Posts: 329

    Dec 26, 2012 4:49 AM GMT
    They don't stop asking because the second you say no, curiosity steps in. "Why not? You're an handsome young man?" "What ever happened to that girl you used to talk about?" etc

    The easiest way to come out is to not think of it as coming out.
  • AMoonHawk

    Posts: 11406

    Dec 26, 2012 4:53 AM GMT
    Just say, "Nope, no gf ... And no bf either ... But if you know anyone let me know I'm always open to suggestions"
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    Dec 26, 2012 5:02 AM GMT
    Last year at the table when I said that I was planning on going grey naturally, my mother asked "You don't dye your hair?"

    I called her on it.
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    Dec 26, 2012 5:40 AM GMT
    The dinner table may not be the best place to come out, unless you want some drama. But if you want your family to really know who you are, it has to happen sometime.
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    Dec 26, 2012 5:46 AM GMT
    Yes I get those questions too and have girls pushed on me.

    Tell them when you're ready and comfortable.
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    Dec 26, 2012 10:10 AM GMT
    I have had those questions asked prior to me coming out. And man that's one of those questions that get you caught off gaurd
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    Dec 26, 2012 10:10 AM GMT
    I have had those questions asked prior to me coming out. And man that's one of those questions that get you caught off gaurd
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    Dec 26, 2012 11:10 AM GMT
    I hated those days. I wish I had some clever advice for you.
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    Dec 26, 2012 11:58 AM GMT
    GAMRican saidIt gets better when you invite your first boyfriend to Christmas Dinner..


    True. Your parents will have an easier time accepting that you like(or love) one particular guy.

    A straight son isn't expected to announce to his parents that he likes sleeping with girls. They probably wouldn't want to think about it. He just introduces a girlfriend whenever he's ready.

    You should feel you have the same privilege of presenting your romantic life to your parents, just the same as your straight brother would.

    My own mom handled my being gay well enough but she only got to full acceptance when she met a real life boyfriend. When she could put a face and a personality to my attraction to guys, she was finally happy for me.
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    Dec 26, 2012 1:11 PM GMT
    GAMRican saidIt gets better when you invite your first boyfriend to Christmas Dinner.

    Then, they stop asking.


    And refer to them as your 'friend'.

    icon_rolleyes.gif
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    Dec 26, 2012 1:32 PM GMT
    “Courage is not the absence of fear, but rather the judgment that something else is more important than fear. The brave may not live forever, but the cautious do not live at all. From now on you'll be traveling the road between who you think you are and who you can be. The key is to allow yourself to make the journey.” Meg Cabot


    “Your time is limited, so don't waste it living someone else's life. Don't be trapped by dogma - which is living with the results of other people's thinking. Don't let the noise of other's opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary.” Steve Jobs
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    Dec 26, 2012 1:46 PM GMT
    Myol said

    “....Don't let the noise of other's opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary.” Steve Jobs


    Just like George Bush!
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    Dec 26, 2012 1:56 PM GMT
    nevz said
    Myol said
    “....Don't let the noise of other's opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary.” Steve Jobs

    Just like George Bush!

    Except Jobs left behind profitable Apple, and Bush left behind financial Armageddon. icon_razz.gif
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    Dec 26, 2012 2:10 PM GMT
    mikkeb saidEverybody is eating and the dreaded question is asked "So, do you have a girlfriend?" ...."No"...silence. Eventually they stop asking right? I just need to get the balls and come out.

    Depends on the family. There is a time and a place for honesty, and perhaps confrontation with family. Christmas dinner usually isn't it.

    Like a soldier, choose your battles and your battlefields wisely, when your prospects for victory are greatest. Never engage your opponent on their terms. Until then, lie low and be patient. At the end of the day, all that ultimately matters is who's won, and who's lost.
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    Dec 26, 2012 2:25 PM GMT
    I had this question asked by a 6-year old and a 3-year-old. When I said no, they asked why... icon_confused.gif
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    Dec 26, 2012 2:29 PM GMT
    AMoonHawk saidJust say, "Nope, no gf ... And no bf either ... But if you know anyone let me know I'm always open to suggestions"

    I used to say that in my early gay years, but everyone figured I was just pushing their buttons. icon_confused.gif
  • HndsmKansan

    Posts: 16311

    Dec 26, 2012 2:30 PM GMT
    financial_jock saidI had this question asked by a 6-year old and a 3-year-old. When I said no, they asked why... icon_confused.gif


    Use it as a "teaching moment" about the importance of saving money for the future... you save your money instead of spending it on dates....lol
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    Dec 26, 2012 2:44 PM GMT
    financial_jock saidI had this question asked by a 6-year old and a 3-year-old. When I said no, they asked why... icon_confused.gif

    And what would any man say, who didn't have a girlfriend? Is every man w/o a girlfriend a gay? What do straights answer?

    And to a 3-year-old? Quite the Inquisition. You laugh and say, without looking guilty: "Not today. And do YOU have a girlfriend?" And get them talking about themselves, the greatest way to change the subject with little kids.
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    Dec 26, 2012 2:52 PM GMT
    ART_DECO said
    financial_jock saidI had this question asked by a 6-year old and a 3-year-old. When I said no, they asked why... icon_confused.gif

    And what would any man say, who didn't have a girlfriend? Is every man w/o a girlfriend a gay? What do straights answer?

    And to a 3-year-old? Quite the Inquisition. You laugh and say, without looking guilty: "Not today. And do YOU have a girlfriend?" And get them talking about themselves, the greatest way to change the subject with little kids.


    I just said because work and school are very busy, and that seemed to appease them, and then they changed the subject.
  • HottJoe

    Posts: 21366

    Dec 26, 2012 2:56 PM GMT
    Come out!!! It gets better. Etc...

    Btw, once you come out, have a bf, start your life, then they ask things like, do you guys think you'll adopt???? Family's always pry. That's why we avoid them most of the year.icon_wink.gif
  • calibro

    Posts: 8888

    Dec 26, 2012 3:39 PM GMT
    just show them your balls next time