Guys who don't like actual sex

  • highforthis

    Posts: 681

    Jan 04, 2013 2:16 AM GMT
    How common is this?

    I love feeling up other guy's bodies, fingering them, making out with my penis inside them, and stuff... but when it comes to traditional rhythmic-thrusting type sex, I'm not interested at all.

    Of course, I tried fingering and dildoing myself in the shower, but again preferred "exploring" rather than thrusting, and only got off from pretending that I'm feeling someone else's hole, so I'm sure I'm not a bottom either.

    I think this is part of why i'm still single and forever alone on the internet =( Anyone care to be armchair therapist?
  • HottJoe

    Posts: 21366

    Jan 04, 2013 2:17 AM GMT
    ...suck
  • highforthis

    Posts: 681

    Jan 04, 2013 2:22 AM GMT
    Oh yeah, I don't like sucking or getting sucked either =(

    Though I do get off on seeing guys' necks bulge out while deep-throating monster cocks in videos, but I won't be able to enjoy the view as an active participant!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 04, 2013 2:30 AM GMT
    highforthis saidGuys who don't like actual sex
    How common is this? [...]


    Sex with the right guy is always superior. I think you just haven't met the right guy to have sex with. When there's chemistry and both/all guys care about the others' satisfaction, there's a huge difference and a different level.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 04, 2013 2:43 AM GMT
    Although I had anal sex many times in my younger days, I never cared for it.

    Now I just feel up the guys and jack off. It's more fun, and safer...to me.

    After all, who spends hours in the gym without wanting to be felt up? I thought that was the whole point of having a tight body. icon_wink.gif
  • PR_GMR

    Posts: 3831

    Jan 04, 2013 2:57 AM GMT
    Why be gay if you don't like sucking and fucking? I don't get guys like that at all.. and when I meet them, I just keep going.
  • highforthis

    Posts: 681

    Jan 04, 2013 3:14 AM GMT
    PR_GMR saidWhy be gay if you don't like sucking and fucking? I don't get guys like that at all.. and when I meet them, I just keep going.


    Other than not sucking dick, I'm doing everything just short of thrusting! I'm still very much gay!

    BuddyinNYC said
    highforthis saidGuys who don't like actual sex
    How common is this? [...]


    Sex with the right guy is always superior. I think you just haven't met the right guy to have sex with. When there's chemistry and both/all guys care about the others' satisfaction, there's a huge difference and a different level.


    I've gotten physical with the "right" guy before, but when it comes to "satisfying" him, I end up doing to him what I want done to myself. Very golden-rule-like, but apparently not enough for him lol, though he was really patient for months. Maybe I have a hard time wrapping my head around top/bottom dominant/submissive dynamics, because I rather see us both as equals.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 04, 2013 3:15 AM GMT
    highforthis saidOh yeah, I don't like sucking or getting sucked either =(


    I don't either, no interest in oral giving or receiving. We're not the majority on this, though.
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    Jan 04, 2013 3:21 AM GMT
    TheGuyNextDoor saidThere's a handful of guys out there like Paul and the OP that are more into groping than grinding. I, on the other hand, am not only tactile.. but very oral. I like to taste it all and need that in return rectum.


    Fixed.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 04, 2013 3:52 AM GMT
    highforthis said[...]
    BuddyinNYC said
    highforthis saidGuys who don't like actual sex
    How common is this? [...]

    Sex with the right guy is always superior. I think you just haven't met the right guy to have sex with. When there's chemistry and both/all guys care about the others' satisfaction, there's a huge difference and a different level.


    I've gotten physical with the "right" guy before, but when it comes to "satisfying" him, I end up doing to him what I want done to myself. Very golden-rule-like, but apparently not enough for him lol, though he was really patient for months. Maybe I have a hard time wrapping my head around top/bottom dominant/submissive dynamics, because I rather see us both as equals.


    Guys are different and need to be satisfied each in his own way. Being equals doesn't mean having the identical or similar needs/likes. One should never assume what one likes what the other likes too.

    Maybe the guy you consider right, just isn't right for sex? Maybe like a loving couple that's been together for so long that they don't have sex anymore with each other but with others?

    Or, maybe you're just asexual?
  • squally

    Posts: 180

    Jan 04, 2013 4:06 AM GMT
    Hold up, why are some people saying you are asexual, as if you aren't normal or something.

    You still have sex with people. What you described can be your technique in sex. Everyone has a different taste and what they look for. And there's no measurement to say how common or uncommon about your taste in not liking "actual sex".
  • highforthis

    Posts: 681

    Jan 04, 2013 8:36 PM GMT
    Also, on an intellectual level, part of me questions "why imitate straight sex"? It's not like we need to cum inside the other guy's hole to make babies lol.

    Maybe I'm also turned off by the strict suck>fuck>finishonface routine in porn...
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 04, 2013 9:33 PM GMT
    PR_GMR saidWhy be gay if you don't like sucking and fucking? I don't get guys like that at all.. and when I meet them, I just keep going.


    There's a LOT more to sex than just fucking and sucking. icon_wink.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 05, 2013 8:27 AM GMT
    Sex isn't limited to Top/Bottoming or Oral. Frottage, Mutual J/O Sessions can also be equally as hot, OP.

    Maybe you should take the time to explore what you DO like before pursuing sexual activities beyond yourself.

    Just be sure to be very clear with prospective playmates about your sexual interests and disinterests.

    No one likes showing up to the party expecting one thing and it's something else entirely.

    Be fair to yourself and your potential sex-mates.
  • mindblank

    Posts: 275

    Jan 05, 2013 11:58 AM GMT
    highforthis saidOh yeah, I don't like sucking or getting sucked either =(

    Though I do get off on seeing guys' necks bulge out while deep-throating monster cocks in videos, but I won't be able to enjoy the view as an active participant!


    Too much internet porn.
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    Jan 05, 2013 8:48 PM GMT
    waterloonicetop saidPlease please make sure you STATE THIS IN YOUR BIO! I am sick of dating versions of you! It is fucking annoying.

    If someone contacts you and says they want a bottom and get sucked, please please state that you do massge only. If you answer an ad for bottom, please actually like having a cock in your ass until he blows his load, and if he stated oral, expect to have cum shot in your mouth area.

    If a gay guy hooks up with you please tell him and save everyone the hassle.



    Ew, you smell like craigslist...
  • highforthis

    Posts: 681

    Jan 05, 2013 11:22 PM GMT
    coolbeans said
    waterloonicetop saidPlease please make sure you STATE THIS IN YOUR BIO! I am sick of dating versions of you! It is fucking annoying.

    If someone contacts you and says they want a bottom and get sucked, please please state that you do massge only. If you answer an ad for bottom, please actually like having a cock in your ass until he blows his load, and if he stated oral, expect to have cum shot in your mouth area.

    If a gay guy hooks up with you please tell him and save everyone the hassle.



    Ew, you smell like craigslist...


    Haha, exactly what I was thinking. I don't feel the need to announce my sex preferences as if I'm some kind of anomaly from the "standard" best practices lolol. I wish more gays were less formulaic and more open minded.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 05, 2013 11:50 PM GMT
    Try a fist.
  • AMoonHawk

    Posts: 11406

    Jan 06, 2013 12:21 AM GMT
    your upbringing leave you with anxiety and guilt of homosexual sex?
  • AMoonHawk

    Posts: 11406

    Jan 06, 2013 12:24 AM GMT
    paulflexes saidAlthough I had anal sex many times in my younger days, I never cared for it.

    Now I just feel up the guys and jack off. It's more fun, and safer...to me.

    After all, who spends hours in the gym without wanting to be felt up? I thought that was the whole point of having a tight body. icon_wink.gif

    Next time try heating up a dildo in hot water icon_biggrin.gif
  • kevmoran

    Posts: 1543

    Jan 06, 2013 8:26 AM GMT
    I feel the same, and guys are pretty much never understanding... I'm even totally cool with dry humping if he can get off on that, but full penetration has never been my cup of tea. I guess the choice is single life forever or suck it up, both literally and figuratively.
  • highforthis

    Posts: 681

    Jan 07, 2013 5:09 AM GMT
    AMoonHawk saidyour upbringing leave you with anxiety and guilt of homosexual sex?


    I rather stick my penis inside a guy and leave it there while making out, instead of pounding away at it, so that makes me a repressed homophobe?
  • TheBizMan

    Posts: 4091

    Jan 07, 2013 5:24 AM GMT
    While I still get off from topping guys, I certainly don't need penetrative sex to still enjoy a good time under the sheets. That's something I've only very recently realized about myself.
  • highforthis

    Posts: 681

    Jan 14, 2013 1:03 AM GMT
    Update... so my friends suggested I practice with a fleshlight. It worked only because it was too similar to jacking off, so I mounted it into a space between my furniture and tried humping it... nope

    The verdict by my friends was that I'm just lazy at thrusting. Maybe I need to build better hip muscles?
  • HottJoe

    Posts: 21366

    Jan 14, 2013 6:39 PM GMT
    kevmoran saidI feel the same, and guys are pretty much never understanding... I'm even totally cool with dry humping if he can get off on that, but full penetration has never been my cup of tea. I guess the choice is single life forever or suck it up, both literally and figuratively.


    You're only 19, babe. You'll love it when you're older and with someone you want badly enough.