"Some People Change"

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    Jan 21, 2013 5:10 AM GMT

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    Jan 21, 2013 5:42 AM GMT
    People can change. Sometimes.
  • AMoonHawk

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    Jan 21, 2013 5:56 AM GMT
    Of course people can change, but it doesn't happen on its own. Some sort of switch or trigger has to be flipped inside of a person to have the desire to change and sometimes that change is not always for the good. Real change usually takes place with some life altering event. But someone just telling someone, you need to change isn't going to do it. There has to be some sort of inner desire that exceeds the desire of that which they are doing.
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    Jan 21, 2013 5:57 AM GMT
    Yes.
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    Jan 21, 2013 6:00 AM GMT
    Aristoshark saidI try to change daily.



    At least my underwear.



    Still got that same damned wig tho....

    At LEAST have it professionally re-teased!!!!!
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    Jan 21, 2013 6:00 AM GMT
    I tried changing to a positive-thinking optimist but realized I'm misanthropic-pessimist-at-heart on the way there.
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    Jan 21, 2013 6:03 AM GMT
    People change everyday.

    Sometimes in less than a nano-second.

    Not everyone We personally WANT to change is capable of it at the time WE want it to to happen.

    But the capacity of Humanity to personify miracles on a daily basis is limitless.

    icon_biggrin.gificon_biggrin.gificon_biggrin.gif
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    Jan 21, 2013 6:04 AM GMT
    I'm a different person every day.
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    Jan 21, 2013 6:08 AM GMT
    unfounded7 saidI tried changing to a positive-thinking optimist but realized I'm misanthropic-pessimist-at-heart on the way there.


    OMG!!! I tried to be less of a Narcissist but the more humble I became ...DAMN - the moar adorable I was!!!!

    It REALLY brought out My eyes...
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    Jan 21, 2013 6:17 AM GMT
    People change on a daily basis. Sometimes it is noticeable and some time it isn't. The only thing constant in this world is change!
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    Jan 21, 2013 6:29 AM GMT
    Cash said
    Aristoshark saidI try to change daily.



    At least my underwear.



    Still got that same damned wig tho....

    At LEAST have it professionally re-teased!!!!!



    Really.......icon_rolleyes.gif
    quentincrisp

  • AMoonHawk

    Posts: 11406

    Jan 21, 2013 6:29 AM GMT
    Change can also be inevitable

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    Jan 21, 2013 6:33 AM GMT
    Between the medications and the voices in my head....I change every few hours into one of my various personalities....icon_eek.gif...anyone know Sybil?icon_rolleyes.gif
  • wild_sky360

    Posts: 1492

    Jan 21, 2013 6:34 AM GMT
    HobokenHobo said I left the theater pondering grace, forgiveness, and redemption.


    These are my absolute favorite themes in film; that move me to my core when done with respect for my intelligence.

    Half Nelson and The Three Burials of Melquiades Estrada also come to mind in that regard.

    I'm working on forgiveness and by extension of that, giving people the benefit of the doubt as first thought. The odds are better than even it's the right choice, and it's a better way to experience life.
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    Jan 21, 2013 6:56 AM GMT
    I'm mostly the same as I was as a kid and friends would say so. I might be more serious since life put me through some wringers. During this time I've seen some remain pretty much the same & others change for the good or bad. Mostly it seems they become more or less of existing aspects of themselves, but also I've seen people take on seemingly new characteristics.

    I've a cousin like me pretty much who she was when we were little. While a different cousin changed drastically to the bad. She has a good qualities but always had a bad streak, screwed me over and over and always I forgave and forgot. Finally she did the unthinkable that I can not let myself forget. She took on characteristics, that even though I still love her, when I ask myself if I'd want to befriend her now, I don't have a yes for that. I don't know if that's change or a matter of "had only I known then what I know now" I never would have befriended her in the first place? Was that her changing or me finally seeing who she is?

    And I've a brother who while growing up was a total douche to our family. But, he was really nice to his friends so a) I always knew he had it in him, but b) that made it frustrating to have him deny us. It wasn't until he was raising his own family and when we were taking care of mom that he finally shared his love with us. He's has been a good brother ever since. He told me that he made an effort to change. And now he hardly remembers who he used to be. So sometimes at dinner I'll remind him for fun.

    And I've seen people get hurt really badly by life and that can change them in ways I hadn't known about them before. And I had a friend who became wealthy but intolerant of anyone without money. I didn't know he could be like that. He used to be a nice kid. I watched the change develop and then I walked away.

    I've a friend from when we were 3 years old. She was a vivacious kid. Smart as hell in school. But then she had a serious incident later in life and I am the only person she's told about it all these years after it happened. Not even her husband knows. Also she had some woman's problem with bearing children that she wanted desperately but can't have. That all changed her. Still such a wonderful person in my eyes but so sad and I don't know how to fix her. And I'm upset with our other friends who abandoned her. She's still our friend but life beat the crap out of her. She's one of the nicest people you'd ever meet.

    I didn't used to think change possible (people are who they are) and then I thought people only changed by degrees of what's already there. Now I'm not sure how it works. Maybe I just didn't see who they really were before I thought I saw them change.
  • Webster666

    Posts: 9217

    Jan 21, 2013 7:33 AM GMT
    Yes, people can change, if they really want to.
    But, you can't change somebody else.

    Also, we often get what we expect, whether it's good or bad.

  • xysx

    Posts: 306

    Jan 21, 2013 7:55 AM GMT
    yes, i firmly believe that people can change
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    Jan 21, 2013 12:17 PM GMT
    Yes people change.

    Sometimes it is through circumstances and/or people around them.

    Sometimes it is from within, this often takes some work.
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    Jan 21, 2013 1:11 PM GMT
    Sure, people can change. They have to want to first.
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    Jan 21, 2013 1:27 PM GMT
    Somewhat, but you really have to be clueless to think someone changed on you. People make choices that define who they are, and I believe everyone is capable of the mundane, beautiful, horrific, expected, and unexpected. I'd only be fooling myself to think things were and would continue to be the same.
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    Jan 21, 2013 3:05 PM GMT
    I do believe people change...
    As the earth crust changes its shape very minutely & often unnoticeable, in the long course we can see it clearly...
    similarly a person, no matter how robust or strict in his character one rarely notice any changes in short period of time...but if you put him in a book and started reading..you will notice the change clearly in every page of his life from beginning to the end!
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    Jan 21, 2013 6:11 PM GMT
    JR_Lore saidSomewhat, but you really have to be clueless to think someone changed on you. People make choices that define who they are, and I believe everyone is capable of the mundane, beautiful, horrific, expected, and unexpected. I'd only be fooling myself to think things were and would continue to be the same.


    I don't know that I think things might stay the same but can I at least expect--even given some fluxuation--a continuum in the same general direction? Because when I see a 180 all of a sudden, I have my doubts as to its authenticity.

    As I sometimes wonder if I'm seeing someone differently or if they did actually change (and maybe sometimes it is a combination of the two), I have questioned the other person and had my suspicions confirmed. When my brother moved to town, I made specific changes in my behavior towards him to facilitate his changing. The changes consisted of two basic components and I was quite conscious of what I was doing: I stopped discussing with him anything that really mattered to me and just kept things to light conversation--I'm actually capable of that though I don't normally engage theantijock-lite. Just in doing that, but also additionally, I didn't let him push any of my buttons. I would be careful not to expose them, or if I accidentally did, I'd short circuit them before reacting to him pushing those buttons.

    At that time there were other issues in his life which helped him change but also, it turned out, he later admitted to me that he saw that he was being a fucked up guy, that he wasn't very nice to us, and he specifically endeavored to change himself. Redemption.

    I confronted my cousin on this too who had changed in the opposite direction. One of the horrible, yet far from the worst thing she said to me was that she felt that she didn't have to be nice to anyone anymore. She got all new agey and thought she had messages to deliver to others regardless of how those so-called messages might make someone feel. I couldn't fucking believe it. She was turning into the shit we see so often online of people not giving a crap about each other. I couldn't be more disappointed in her. And then she got even worse. She embraced the worst parts of herself. Lost cause.

    Harry7785 saidI do believe people change...
    As the earth crust changes its shape very minutely & often unnoticeable, in the long course we can see it clearly...
    similarly a person, no matter how robust or strict in his character one rarely notice any changes in short period of time...but if you put him in a book and started reading..you will notice the change clearly in every page of his life from beginning to the end!


    That was beautiful.
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    Jan 21, 2013 6:23 PM GMT
    @theantijock

    Thank you...
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    Jan 21, 2013 6:30 PM GMT
    I believe people can change. I think people do change.

    I haven't seen it but I'm always willing to give someone another chance. Someone needs to WANT to change.

    Like with a former friend of mine that I told off last year because she, to be perfectly blunt and honest, is a total cunt. But she knows that when she's ready to grow up and start treating people better then I will welcome her back but from the looks of it, our mutual friends will be sticking around her.

    So, while I am quite pessimistic about someone changing, I think people can and do. I'm just not the catalyst for any of it. XD
  • Medjai

    Posts: 2671

    Jan 21, 2013 6:46 PM GMT
    No. I believe people can change how they express themselves and alter superficial habits. However, overall, people are who they are deep down.