Meeting Men from the Internet

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    Feb 02, 2013 12:26 PM GMT
    What's your experiences been fellas?

    Met one man last night seemed ok, didn't work out, but he told me he had sex with a 12 year old guy from Cambodia I thought that was sick, he's said it was a joke when I challenged him but don't believe him, what a sick fucker.

    Sure all experiences are like that, but guess it's great to go in bars and places to meet instead of the internet.icon_confused.gif
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    Feb 02, 2013 12:31 PM GMT
    Soz mean to say not like that. icon_redface.gif
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    Feb 02, 2013 1:43 PM GMT
    globetrotter2012 saidWhat's your experiences been fellas?

    Met one man last night seemed ok, didn't work out, but he told me he had sex with a 12 year old guy from Cambodia I thought that was sick, he's said it was a joke when I challenged him but don't believe him, what a sick fucker.

    Sure all experiences are like that, but guess it's great to go in bars and places to meet instead of the internet.icon_confused.gif


    So then it's not just the internet because much more than likely, that person has people in his life for 20 30 40 years, whatever, who don't know about that aspect of him. What of parents who raise a kid who turns out to be a murderer? They didn't know either and that kid was sleeping in their house and giving them kisses. Holy crap, what must that do to ya?

    I've had people in my life for decades before they revealed the depths of their depravity, the extent of how cruel they can be. Some so horrific that I can't let myself befriend them again now that I know. It's unfuckingbelieveable what people are capable of. They'll surprise ya. I don't put anything past anyone anymore.

    You would think that would make me paranoid and distrusting. Au contraire! I now know for certain that there's nothing an internet stranger can do to me that would be worse than what was done to me by someone who for so long I loved.

    I'll avoid that crap as I am able, but it ain't just the internet. This is real life. Get used to it.
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    Feb 02, 2013 1:46 PM GMT
    I met my boyfriend on Manhunt. we've been together for a little over 3.5 years now =)
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    Feb 02, 2013 1:48 PM GMT
    willular saidI met my boyfriend on Manhunt. we've been together for a little over 3.5 years now =)


    Excellent. I also met my last best bud online in the early AOL days. we were together for 10 years. There's no way we would have met otherwise.
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    Feb 02, 2013 1:50 PM GMT
    theantijock said
    willular saidI met my boyfriend on Manhunt. we've been together for a little over 3.5 years now =)


    Excellent. I also met my last best bud online in the early AOL days. we were together for 10 years. There's no way we would have met otherwise.


    I feel lucky with the internet, to be honest. I can't imagine trying to find other dudes back in the 70s or 80s. were there sections in the newspaper that were equivelent to grindr/scruff? lol.

    think of these forums themselves --- i've made a good amount of friends and met people from other forums i've posted on. overall a great experience.
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    Feb 02, 2013 1:56 PM GMT
    haven't met those kind of people yet, fortunate enough!
    Sex with 12 year old is sick indeed, even that thought of it is sickening me icon_sad.gif

    It's internet, all kinds of people exist, the good, the bad, the arrogant, the fool, the smart, perhaps if you are luck enough a nicest guy you've never met in real life...
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    Feb 02, 2013 2:09 PM GMT
    willular said
    theantijock said
    willular saidI met my boyfriend on Manhunt. we've been together for a little over 3.5 years now =)


    Excellent. I also met my last best bud online in the early AOL days. we were together for 10 years. There's no way we would have met otherwise.


    I feel lucky with the internet, to be honest. I can't imagine trying to find other dudes back in the 70s or 80s. were there sections in the newspaper that were equivelent to grindr/scruff? lol.

    think of these forums themselves --- i've made a good amount of friends and met people from other forums i've posted on. overall a great experience.


    I don't know anyone who used a personal ad. We just went out and met people. It was hugely fun. And remember that was in the 70s, early 80s, at least, without AIDS to worry about so our fun was uninhibited. Grindr? I recall a few parties we held in elevators when "going down?" meant something.

    We actually did pretty well without the internet as hard as that might be to imagine. My first 10-year bud and I were brought together by our mothers who were friends. And that was the most wonderful relationship I've ever known.

    So, I guess what I'm sayin' is I'll take it about however I can get it. Online, offline, underlined just don't go over the line. I probably come off to some as a pain in the ass but, yes, I'm actually that easy.
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    Feb 02, 2013 2:13 PM GMT
    [quote]
    I don't know anyone who used a personal ad. We just went out and met people. It was hugely fun. And remember that was in the 70s, early 80s, at least, without AIDS to worry about so our fun was uninhibited. Grindr? I recall a few parties we held in elevators when "going down?" meant something.

    We actually did pretty well without the internet as hard as that might be to imagine. My first 10-year bud and I were brought together by our mothers who were friends. And that was the most wonderful relationship I've ever known.

    So, I guess what I'm sayin' is I'll take it about however I can get it. Online, offline, underlined just don't go over the line. I probably come off to some as a pain in the ass but, yes, I'm actually that easy.[/quote]

    I think we as humans just adapt and overcome whatever the situation is. if you grew up only knowing one thing, then you rolled with it, you know?

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    Feb 02, 2013 2:27 PM GMT
    willular saidI think we as humans just adapt and overcome whatever the situation is. if you grew up only knowing one thing, then you rolled with it, you know?


    It is what it is. Time sure won't be turning back anytime soon.

    http://www.yale.edu/acmelab/articles/Internet_and_Social_Life.pdf
    People are not passively affected by technology, but actively shape its use and influence (Fischer1992, Hughes & Hans 2001). The Internet has unique, even transformational qualities as a communication channel, including relative anonymity and the ability to easily link with others who have similar interests, values, and beliefs. Research has found that the relative anonymity aspect encourages self-expression, and the relative absence of physical and nonverbal interaction cues (e.g., attractiveness) facilitates the formation of relationships on other, deeper bases such as shared values and beliefs. At the same time, however, these “limited bandwidth” features of Internet communication also tend to leave a lot unsaid and unspecified, and open to inference and interpretation. Not surprisingly, then, one’s own desires and goals regarding the people with whom one interacts have been found to make a dramatic difference in the assumptions and attributions one makes within that informational void.
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    Feb 02, 2013 5:36 PM GMT
    Unless your intentions are for sex, it's hard to be genuine guys on the internet. When you do, they live across the country or halfway around the world, lol.
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    Feb 02, 2013 6:08 PM GMT
    I came here for health & fitness discussions, and to exchange information with other bright guys on a variety of subjects - - back in '07. In Forums I began to read the words of someone exceedingly bright (and handsome). We began to notice each other, and then write to each other - occasionally. We began to speak by phone, but didn't think anything could come of it because we lived on opposite coasts (of the U.S.) but, never say never - - - here we are together in CA since 2010.

    Of all the places I met exes, (work, friends, clubs, etc.) I never thought the Internet would be the place where I would meet The One.
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    Feb 02, 2013 6:50 PM GMT
    I was close to meeting a person (actually 3) when I was in Ireland. Never happened but it was still fun being in the same area as him/her
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    Feb 02, 2013 7:23 PM GMT
    globetrotter2012 saidWhat's your experiences been fellas?

    Met one man last night seemed ok, didn't work out, but he told me he had sex with a 12 year old guy from Cambodia I thought that was sick, he's said it was a joke when I challenged him but don't believe him, what a sick fucker.

    Sure all experiences are like that, but guess it's great to go in bars and places to meet instead of the internet.icon_confused.gif


    omg lol okay, i've met dozens of guys online, and more than half of them made lousy dates, but they certainly did not say things like "i had sex with a 12 year old where child rape is well within the legal boundaries".

    Okay, meeting people online is a mixed bag of awesome and absolutely awful - just like it is anywhere else. You can meet plenty of shitty people at a bar, at a cafe, at school, at work, etc.. and also online. It is just harder to forget the people you've met online who were shitty because, chances are, you've probably talked to them for a bit and established some level of connection before meeting them. They certainly aren't complete "strangers" to you by the time you meet them, so they are less disposable in your memory bank than random strangers you run into in other environments.

    Many people argue that online dating is for people who are seriously insecure and have social malfunctions that rendered them incapable of socializing in a "real world". This no longer applies anymore because nowadays, even the guys who are not considered to have either of those two traits use online dating system like POF + Grindr (don't lie homos, I KNOW you have it on your phone! lols). Another benefit to online dating other than its appeal to people who are typically too damn shy to say hi to random strangers is the pure ease of it that both extroverts and introverts can enjoy. With sections like "About Me" conveniently located on the profiles of users of these online dating tools, people can - theoretically speaking - filter people not just based on looks, but also on their personality/interest/career/etc.

    Then there is also another thing that we all must admit to - all humans are insecure beings, to a different extent but insecure nonetheless. As humans, we don't like being disappointed - worse, we don't like being wrong. It hurts us, and the pain makes it difficult for us to make the same mistake, but also to take the same risk that might be necessary for us to get what we want. And online dating tools, assuming that their theories can be readily proven in real life, definitely do accomodate that part of our nature.

    I am not going to lie; well over half of the guys I've met online have been downright dreadful. They are in the list among hobos, Jehova's Witness, some other religious freaks, disgustingly obese people, etc. that I would just filter out of the sight as a pathetic pretention that I live in this perfect world where these unsightly people have become obsolete. But then the guys on the other end of the spectrum who have been better than not awful - they were/are among the most awesome people I've ever met! I still can't forget the night that I met about 12 RJers - most of whom lived in Toronto - and how amazing it turned out. These guys made me feel at home, and we hung out on a regular basis after that first meetup.

    My advice is, be open minded. If you are at a time of your life where relationship building is among the top in your list of priorities, the best way to meet that priority is to make yourself available as much as possible. Sign yourself up on a few of these online dating websites that are NOT manhunt, adam4adam - you get where i'm going. Sign up for volunteer opportunities in gay community, join a sports team for gay guys - there are lots of options available, especially if you live in a city that is relatively gay-friendly.
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    Feb 02, 2013 8:22 PM GMT
    We met on Grindr. We've been together and monogamous for 2 years.
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    Feb 02, 2013 8:26 PM GMT
    I've met people in real life that I first met online. It's not a big deal. There are some nice guys and some freaks, just like in real life. I always get to know them a little first and then meet somewhere neutral. If they're crazy, you can usually figure it out in a short amount of time.
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    Feb 02, 2013 8:29 PM GMT
    DudeInNOVA saidI've met people in real life that I first met online. It's not a big deal. There are some nice guys and some freaks, just like in real life. I always get to know them a little first and then meet somewhere neutral. If they're crazy, you can usually figure it out in a short amount of time.


    ^ This.

    It's usually a good idea to try to converse a bit rather than just exchange stats and go for it...
  • blueandgold

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    Feb 02, 2013 8:31 PM GMT
    That Cambodian child sounds like a real slut.
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    Feb 02, 2013 8:57 PM GMT
    Be honest. :-P
  • cavecanem10

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    Feb 02, 2013 11:57 PM GMT
    My boyfriend and I met a little over a year ago online, and have been monogamous. I do like to tell people we met on christianmingle.com and surprisingly, a lot of them believe me at first.

    Having met people on the internet before, I think it does take time and patience to find the person that you're really going to click with. There are plenty of fakes and psychopaths on the internet, but for people who are sane and legitimately looking for something, you just have to play the odds and take people for a spin.

    I think it's interesting to think about how it was done back in the day, it must've been very hard, but then at the same time, they must have been way more effective with their time because they weren't wasting it!
  • spacemagic

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    Feb 03, 2013 12:12 AM GMT
    I met a guy from RealJock. He messaged me asking me to go see a movie with him, and I figured "Hey, why the hell not? He's hot and I want to get back into the dating scene anyway. It'll be a one-off thing." 7 or 8 dates later, we're now dating and he's coming over tomorrow to hang out and watch the Super Bowl (commercials). He is a fantastic guy and I'm glad I took a chance.

    Long story short, meeting guys from the internet is hit or miss. I've had my own negative experiences but there's always a chance for something good to happen.
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    Feb 03, 2013 12:40 AM GMT
    spacemagic saidI met a guy from RealJock. He messaged me asking me to go see a movie with him, and I figured "Hey, why the hell not? He's hot and I want to get back into the dating scene anyway. It'll be a one-off thing." 7 or 8 dates later, we're now dating and he's coming over tomorrow to hang out and watch the Super Bowl (commercials). He is a fantastic guy and I'm glad I took a chance.

    Long story short, meeting guys from the internet is hit or miss. I've had my own negative experiences but there's always a chance for something good to happen.


    that's an awesome story. glad it worked out!
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    Feb 03, 2013 12:41 AM GMT
    Some good, some bad, some awful
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    Feb 03, 2013 12:48 AM GMT
    i was that 12 yr old boy
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    Feb 03, 2013 1:06 AM GMT

    That 12 yr old boy story is disgusting...

    The timing of this thread is perfect. I just found out today that the "cool" guy I was chatting with is a total liar.

    Just shitty luck

    Fall down 6 times, get up 7.