Bullied gay teen, Jadin Bell, who hanged himself, dies after clinging to life for 16 days

  • metta

    Posts: 39118

    Feb 04, 2013 6:09 AM GMT
    Bullied gay teen who hanged himself, dies after clinging to life for 16 days


    http://www.lgbtqnation.com/2013/02/bullied-gay-teen-who-hanged-himself-dies-after-clinging-to-life-for-16-days/
  • metta

    Posts: 39118

    Feb 04, 2013 7:55 AM GMT
    526514_407757892651184_564811372_n.jpg
  • thadjock

    Posts: 2183

    Feb 04, 2013 5:55 PM GMT
    as tragic as it is when any person dies unnecesarily,

    i have a message for gay teens that nobody seems to be sending:

    you teach people how to treat you. and when you take your own life, the bully didn't kill you , you did. it's too bad if your family or friends can't step up and be who you need them to be, but there are a milliion other places to get help and support. own it.

    the only way to stop bullying is to refuse to be a victim.

    the LGBT community fosters the victim mentality with warm hugs and sympathy, and "it get's better" psa's,

    i get it, it's a feel good for the community but it doesn't do jack to help these kids take control of their lives. " it get's better" is a lie, YOU make your own life better.
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    Feb 04, 2013 6:02 PM GMT
    thadjock saidas tragic as it is when any person dies unnecesarily,

    i have a message for gay teens that nobody seems to be sending:

    you teach people how to treat you. and when you take your own life, the bully didn't kill you , you did. it's too bad if your family or friends can't step up and be who you need them to be, but there are a milliion other places to get help and support. own it.

    the only way to stop bullying is to refuse to be a victim.

    the LGBT community fosters the victim mentality with warm hugs and sympathy, and "it get's better" psa's,

    i get it, it's a feel good for the community but it doesn't do jack to help these kids take control of their lives. " it get's better" is a lie, YOU make your own life better.


    Amen and Amen.
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    Feb 04, 2013 6:04 PM GMT
    thadjock saidas tragic as it is when any person dies unnecesarily,

    i have a message for gay teens that nobody seems to be sending:

    you teach people how to treat you. and when you take your own life, the bully didn't kill you , you did. it's too bad if your family or friends can't step up and be who you need them to be, but there are a milliion other places to get help and support. own it.

    the only way to stop bullying is to refuse to be a victim.

    the LGBT community fosters the victim mentality with warm hugs and sympathy, and "it get's better" psa's,

    i get it, it's a feel good for the community but it doesn't do jack to help these kids take control of their lives. " it get's better" is a lie, YOU make your own life better.


    Harsh truth.
  • shutoman

    Posts: 505

    Feb 04, 2013 6:31 PM GMT
    "
    thadjockit get's better" is a lie, YOU make your own life better.
    "

    I was with you a lot until here. But, as you grow older, you just get used to yourself. That's right, you become more comfortable being who you are without even trying and that's worth living for.

    So, if we're going to tell kids that their life is worth fighting for - which we should - we should also tell them that they'd be fighting a winning battle.

    Plus, I don't believe anyone deserves to die at their own hands.

    So, you're right thadjock that a bit of balance is needed; but it's carrot and stick, just like everything else.
  • JackDoyle

    Posts: 706

    Feb 04, 2013 6:57 PM GMT
    It really breaks my heart!! I wish these kids would just try and pull through! Disgusted to hear of another suicide!!People need to remember it's a long time solution to a short term problem..Never give up!! there has been so many young suicides in my small town in the past few weeks just, so sad icon_sad.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Feb 04, 2013 7:02 PM GMT
    southbeach1500 saidWe need anti-gay bullying laws... oh yeah, we already have them and they're are being touted as Obama's "achievements"....


    Please keep your political opinions to articles not discussing a young kid who is now dead.
  • CityofDreams

    Posts: 1173

    Feb 04, 2013 7:07 PM GMT
    thadjock saidas tragic as it is when any person dies unnecesarily,

    i have a message for gay teens that nobody seems to be sending:

    you teach people how to treat you. and when you take your own life, the bully didn't kill you , you did. it's too bad if your family or friends can't step up and be who you need them to be, but there are a milliion other places to get help and support. own it.

    the only way to stop bullying is to refuse to be a victim.

    the LGBT community fosters the victim mentality with warm hugs and sympathy, and "it get's better" psa's,

    i get it, it's a feel good for the community but it doesn't do jack to help these kids take control of their lives. " it get's better" is a lie, YOU make your own life better.


    I disagree. People have walked through different paths than you. Your life experiences don't necessarily mirror theirs. I have seen bullying go as far as a gang of individuals physically attacking a gay young man, as they screamed one derogatory term after the other. I was about 8 when this happened. Sometimes the bullying can feel like it's larger than your own life. It's not about refusing to be the victim, it's about them fucking up your psychology to the extent of you only seeing yourself as a victim.
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    Feb 04, 2013 7:12 PM GMT
    This is sooooo sad. When will it end!? These tragedies perpetuate my constant acute sense of Weltschmerz. icon_cry.gif RIP
  • SoCalSun

    Posts: 46

    Feb 04, 2013 7:13 PM GMT
    metta8 said526514_407757892651184_564811372_n.jpg


    I agree. It is our duty to stand up for those who can't and speak for those who can't.
    When I was a freshmen in college, I heard about an incident in which a high school kid shot a gay student in the head and killed him at point blank. This happened at a high school 20 minutes away from where I live.
    Shit like this has got to stop!!!!!!! icon_evil.gificon_evil.gificon_evil.gificon_evil.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Feb 04, 2013 7:16 PM GMT
    I think we need more programs that teach Bullied kids empowerment rather than programs to punish bullies...There will always be bullies especially with the internet now...

    May he RIP!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Feb 04, 2013 8:32 PM GMT
    *looks at SB's shrivelled up cold dead heart*


    Hmm....about as functional as an appendix.
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    Feb 04, 2013 8:33 PM GMT
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    Feb 04, 2013 8:37 PM GMT
    CityOfDreams said, " I have seen bullying go as far as a gang of individuals physically attacking a gay young man, as they screamed one derogatory term after the other. I was about 8 when this happened. Sometimes the bullying can feel like it's larger than your own life. It's not about refusing to be the victim, it's about them fucking up your psychology to the extent of you only seeing yourself as a victim."

    TRUE. I think too many forget these are children, not little adults.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Feb 04, 2013 8:38 PM GMT
    This has been going on for so long, finally the past few years it is coming to light....I am so sad about it, I do hope kids can change their behavior
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Feb 04, 2013 8:38 PM GMT
    As for SB, laws enable people to pursue legal recourse.

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    Feb 04, 2013 8:50 PM GMT
    thadjock saidas tragic as it is when any person dies unnecesarily,

    i have a message for gay teens that nobody seems to be sending:

    you teach people how to treat you. and when you take your own life, the bully didn't kill you , you did. it's too bad if your family or friends can't step up and be who you need them to be, but there are a milliion other places to get help and support. own it.

    the only way to stop bullying is to refuse to be a victim.

    the LGBT community fosters the victim mentality with warm hugs and sympathy, and "it get's better" psa's,

    i get it, it's a feel good for the community but it doesn't do jack to help these kids take control of their lives. " it get's better" is a lie, YOU make your own life better.


    Sadly something like depression these situations can bring on makes your black and white view rather more grey. Some cannot fight on their own after a while and do need help.

    Support, compassion and a little care for some over a lecture as not everyone is the same with the same strength.

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Feb 04, 2013 8:52 PM GMT
    It does get better. It's just a damned shame you have to wait years (sometimes decades) for the bullies to grow up and mature (sadly some do not). And there's always a fresh crop of bullies to take their place and a fresh crop of gay youth to suffer their taunts.

    It is the responsibility and sacred trust of the adults and the authorities to see that this crap is not tolerated. Sadly though it's the adults in their lives that fail them.
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    Feb 04, 2013 8:59 PM GMT

    UndercoverMan said, "It is the responsibility and sacred trust of the adults and the authorities to see that this crap is not tolerated. Sadly though it's the adults in their lives that fail them."

    Thank you.
  • thadjock

    Posts: 2183

    Feb 04, 2013 9:04 PM GMT
    UndercoverMan saidIt does get better. It's just a damned shame you have to wait years (sometimes decades) for the bullies to grow up and mature (sadly some do not). And there's always a fresh crop of bullies to take their place and a fresh crop of gay youth to suffer their taunts.

    .


    i will never understand the passive resignation so many gays foster with the attitude that you just have to wait it out.

    maybe that was the case in the 60s,70s,80s, but gays are out in full light now, the president of the US repealed DADT, a majority of voters support same sex marriage, the tide has turned! rise up and own your future!

    the only way "there will always be bullies", is if there are always people willing to be bullied.
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    Feb 04, 2013 9:04 PM GMT
    I am no child psychologist, but it seems obvious (and from experience) that kids do not have the perspective to see that these things are temporary. To an adult, a miserable childhood may have been a small fraction of a total life. To a kid, it is 100% of their experience. Nor do they see that they have any control over events. They are wholly-owned property of their parents and often by extension, the local preachers. They are compelled to attend these schools. "Anti-bullying" policies are a cruel joke, since the bullies are also the star athletes who get rewarded for aggression. It goes on. In small towns, kids may have no place at all to turn.

    So something like the "It gets better" campaign may have value. Of course it's possible that the message could be improved. Or maybe someone needs to follow up with designing the next step. i.e. If you are one of these bullied kids (and not necessarily just "gay" ones) what do you do now.
  • RSportsguy

    Posts: 1925

    Feb 04, 2013 9:11 PM GMT
    Sad! Just very very sad! icon_cry.gif
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    Feb 04, 2013 9:11 PM GMT
    TheAdjock, I have never met a child that is willing to be bullied. As a children's author, I have met many.

    "i will never understand the passive resignation so many gays foster with the attitude that you just have to wait it out."

    This isn't true; myself, my partner and many other adults straight and gay and Bi teach kids to stand up for themselves as best we can, and intervene in addressing bullies as often as possible.

    Look up internet swarming as an example of what these kids have to deal with.

    *in grief* They're children for god's sake.
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    Feb 04, 2013 9:15 PM GMT
    thadjock said
    UndercoverMan saidIt does get better. It's just a damned shame you have to wait years (sometimes decades) for the bullies to grow up and mature (sadly some do not). And there's always a fresh crop of bullies to take their place and a fresh crop of gay youth to suffer their taunts.

    .


    i will never understand the passive resignation so many gays foster with the attitude that you just have to wait it out.

    maybe that was the case in the 60s,70s,80s, but gays are out in full light now, the president of the US repealed DADT, a majority of voters support same sex marriage, the tide has turned! rise up and own your future!

    the only way "there will always be bullies", is if there are always people willing to be bullied.


    Really constructive! About as much use as saying there would be no murders if people are not willing to be murdered. Like it is in their control!!! Same as being bullied.

    Your lack of understanding is frightening for anyone who has been in this situation. I have and thank god I had support