You can go to THE RITZ on a friday/saturday. Its a quaint gay bar with no cover charge.There is an excellent DJ there on Friday and he/she (nah its a he ... lol) plays a good mixture of techno, hip hop, and rock (i think its rock).
Your age group +, lots of hot people, lots of drunk people. Very friendly (and sometimes touchy).
The Ritz NYC:http://www.yelp.com/biz/the-ritz-new-york
It gets packed on a Friday- Saturday, but the crowd is great.
Mr Black is good too, though not as friendly. Same site has reviews of Posh and Therapy though those are mostly Bars
http://www.mrblacknyc.com/2008/parties/ (MR BLACK) which is packed on Saturday.
If you are into techno/Dance you have to check out HIRO Room on a SUNDAY night. http://www.themaritimehotel.com/hiroBallroom.html
Its free (again) before 12. You _should_ get there before 12 because otherwise you will wait on line forever. 11pm is a great time to get there. Good music, good drinks, sexy people (and horny people). Your age range +, all types of bodies. Everyone seems really relaxed for a Sunday night (bitches don't work or what)??
Yep... Those are some pretty good places to hit. I think we should also point out to Mr. Benson that NYC has different gay scenes and is not confined to just one specific area. Example...West Village:
You'll usually find an older crowd, drag queens, leather daddies, etc... What to visit there? Stonewall, The hangar, The monster, Duplex. East Village:
Total opposite of the West Vill... You'll most likely find younger, edgy, grungy rock fags and an über laid back crowd. Hole in the wall bars (personally my favorite area)... Places to check out... The Cock, Urge, Eastern Bloc and PhoenixChelsea:
Yep... Gay Mecca NY! From 14th street to about 28th on 8th Ave. It's basically a friggin runway. It's where all the trendy 'mos go to see and be seen. You'll run into your buff Chelsea boys, bitchy queens and everything in between. Places to see... Gym bar, G Lounge, View bar, Barracuda, X|ES, Mr. Blacks, The Eagle, and as D972 mentioned... Hiro at the Maritime hotel on Sunday's is a must! One of the reasons I'm a mess on Monday's at work... ha haHell's Kitchen:
Also nicknamed Hellsea being that it's not that different from Chelsea. What to see there: Posh, Therapy, Vlada, The Ritz
There are other areas such as the Meatpacking district, The upper west side and many more, but I don't really frequent those, so I don't really have anything to say there.
Hope this helps!