Increase in civility?

  • bradsmith

    Posts: 175

    Feb 09, 2013 3:56 PM GMT
    I hesitate to raise this topic since I've seen so much of the opposite on here. But, as of late, meaning the past six months, or so...I've noted an increase in civility...at least toward me personally. My metric is simply the response I receive from any guy I hotlist...nearly uniformly I receive a brief message of thanks. Perhaps it's just me, but it seems like the overall level of civility on here might be rising. Is this my imagination? Hallucination?
    mark.
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    Feb 09, 2013 4:09 PM GMT
    icon_question.gif I don't quite understand what you mean.

  • Feb 09, 2013 5:15 PM GMT
    Me neither!
  • HottJoe

    Posts: 21366

    Feb 09, 2013 5:20 PM GMT
    I've only been a member for about six months, so I'll just assume I brought this new sense of civility. And you're welcome.icon_biggrin.gif
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    Feb 09, 2013 5:22 PM GMT
    My brief experience on RJ so far is that the guys on here are courteous and civilised - this is in marked contrast to gay sites in the UK to which I no longer subscribe
  • monet

    Posts: 1093

    Feb 09, 2013 6:48 PM GMT
    There are a few bad apples on RJ who are consistently obnoxious and argumentative but for the most part the people here are a pretty good lot.
  • Medjai

    Posts: 2671

    Feb 09, 2013 6:51 PM GMT
    People are getting more civil?
  • toastvenom

    Posts: 1020

    Feb 09, 2013 6:52 PM GMT
    its really bloody simple, "do onto others as u would want done unto you" I read that in a book somewhere, can't remember which one, I think it was dean koontz. civility should always be a constant and not measured by a barometer
  • HottJoe

    Posts: 21366

    Feb 09, 2013 6:55 PM GMT
    Toastvenom saidits really bloody simple, "do onto others as u would want done unto you" I read that in a book somewhere, can't remember which one, I think it was dean koontz. civility should always be a constant and not measured by a barometer


    The golden rule is always good advice, but, fyi, Dean Koontz didn't orginate that little gem. I think it might have been Jesus, but I'm not sure. It's a very old saying, though.
  • monet

    Posts: 1093

    Feb 09, 2013 6:58 PM GMT
    Toastvenom saidits really bloody simple, "do onto others as u would want done unto you" I read that in a book somewhere, can't remember which one, I think it was dean koontz. civility should always be a constant and not measured by a barometer


    Yeah, I'm pretty sure it was Dean Koontz who came up with that idea. LOL! (I was going to go uncivilized on your ass but decided this was not the appropriate forum in which to do so.)
  • toastvenom

    Posts: 1020

    Feb 09, 2013 7:00 PM GMT
    The golden rule is always good advice, but, fyi, Dean Koontz didn't orginate that little gem. I think it might have been Jesus, but I'm not sure. It's a very old saying, though.[/quote]



    huh, jesus you say? sounds like a smart fella. live and learn. I hope dean koontz is paying him royalities

    ps dean koontz sucks by the way im more of a Charles bukowski kinda fella
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    Feb 09, 2013 7:03 PM GMT
    Some of us try and be as civil as possible, sometimes it goes sideways as it starts out as friendly jocularity...it can backfire...but there has been some flamewars on here.
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    Feb 09, 2013 7:07 PM GMT
    When I first joined in 2009, flamewars would go ALL NIGHT and would go for miles. The responses would curl your hair.

    This is the most civil I've ever seen it! icon_biggrin.gif
  • wild_sky360

    Posts: 1492

    Feb 09, 2013 7:12 PM GMT
    Just yesterday I was reflecting on this same observation. So as not to put the spotlight on any individuals, I'll just say I've observed a handful of RJ veterans that seem to be diffusing some potential ugliness.

    They aren't dampening feisty personalities, at all; just gently reminding people to tone down the hate, which only breeds more of the same and makes for an unpleasant experience for everyone.
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    Feb 09, 2013 7:32 PM GMT
    I think one reaps what one sows. If you are civil to others, others are likely to be civil back to your.
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    Feb 09, 2013 7:37 PM GMT
    i am not civil at all, if its for me civilization and society can be wiped out for all i care, fresh start!!!icon_twisted.gif
  • LEANDRO_NJ

    Posts: 1116

    Feb 09, 2013 7:48 PM GMT
    The flame wars got so bad a year or two ago that I had to leave and take a break from RJ! its worth mentioning thou that the newbies aren't necessarily the only ones who provoke this RJ phenomenon, as some RJ Veterans often and still do! my solution to avoid them is simple, I just brush them off with a kind response, and if they still insist on provoking me I just put them on ignore! oh and one more thing, I don't bother participate or put my two cents in a thread with the potential to turn into a flame war! and if this one eventually does RJ administrators give me the option deleting my own post!!
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    Feb 09, 2013 7:52 PM GMT
    I've noticed it too.

    Maybe the winter mellows people out?

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    Feb 09, 2013 8:08 PM GMT
    jackbennett saidMy brief experience on RJ so far is that the guys on here are courteous and civilised - this is in marked contrast to gay sites in the UK to which I no longer subscribe


    Which sites in the UK be these?

    Frankly, the only interesting thing about RJ is and always has been these "flame wars" you speak of. Although I prefer to refer to them as healthy debate. For me.

    I'd much rather pit my wits against a worthy opponent than decide whether "the guy above me" is a Jock, a Fairy or a Cunt.

    As for "trolls" like the fascinating specimins that were Bello and Mad Stuart, for example, in days of old, why on earth did they annoy people? Why would anyone want to go and get them banned? The sheer quality of the entertainment they provided was gold standard.

    I enjoyed many a frenzied session of cheeky banter with both of them. OK so I stopped bantering with Mad Stuart once I clicked he was indeed, mad, and probably more a danger to himself than to anyone else. And that's more than I can say of some guys on here, who quite shamefully taunted and goaded him ...

    But I digress.

    I regard myself as generally very civil, and polite, albeit someone who's quick to enter a heated discussion and a battle of wits when the mood takes me. I enjoy the odd piss-take too. I'm a northerner, so sue me.

    Frankly, often months and months on end of silence from me are a consequence of too many RJ threads that consist of everyone agreeing with each other and talking shit.

    Long live the trolls and the flamers, for they bring life. Amen.

  • bradsmith

    Posts: 175

    Feb 09, 2013 9:54 PM GMT
    Allow me to clarify: I don't mean that RJ'ers should sit in a circle, holding hands and singing Kumbaya...although I have no problem with those who choose such.

    But I remember flame wars that accomplished nothing...other than to make me pity the participants. I guess I always remember that, in a pissing match, both people still end up smelling.

    In any event, appreciate the responses and perspectives...now back to studying my navel (if I can find it (grin))

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vo9AH4vG2wA
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    Feb 09, 2013 10:38 PM GMT
    Aristoshark said
    HottJoe said
    Toastvenom saidits really bloody simple, "do onto others as u would want done unto you" I read that in a book somewhere, can't remember which one, I think it was dean koontz. civility should always be a constant and not measured by a barometer


    The golden rule is always good advice, but, fyi, Dean Koontz didn't orginate that little gem. I think it might have been Jesus, but I'm not sure. It's a very old saying, though.

    The golden rule is attributed to Rabbi Hillel (died in the year 10):

    "That which is hateful to you, do not do to your fellow. That is the whole Torah; the rest is the explanation; go and learn."


    yuck a sharkicon_mad.gif
  • MidwesternKid

    Posts: 1167

    Feb 09, 2013 10:50 PM GMT
    All depends on who decides to put there two cents in on a thread. It seems it takes that one or two frequent posters to say something and then BAM, there goes a flame war.
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    Feb 09, 2013 11:17 PM GMT
    Well, to address your response rate from your hotlists, this was a big discussion in Jan so maybe that accounts for the last 30 days worth of civility.
    http://www.realjock.com/gayforums/2914515
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    Feb 11, 2013 2:02 AM GMT
    n8698u saidWhen I first joined in 2009, flamewars would go ALL NIGHT and would go for miles. The responses would curl your hair.

    This is the most civil I've ever seen it! icon_biggrin.gif


    I know. It's fuckin lame as shittttttttttttttttttttttttttttttt
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Feb 11, 2013 2:03 AM GMT
    OP, you can edit your entire post you know.