Don't like being hugged... is it really that strange?

  • GraffitiMySou...

    Posts: 139

    Feb 10, 2013 12:10 PM GMT
    I just don't like being hugged whether it's after sex or out of the blue, just to show affection. All the guys I've been with thought it was weird as hell. I'm a bottom (by choice...) so you'd assume I like being hugged and cuddled up, but no. I prefer to do the hugging/showing affection. But then again, most tops don't like that. Why is that? Is it because I feel like I need to be the one who's in control? If yes, is there something wrong with it? More importantly, is there something wrong with ME?

    Thoughts?
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    Feb 10, 2013 1:17 PM GMT
    So do you like to hug if you're in a long term relationship? I can see why guys wouldn't like to hug or cuddle if it's a random hookup and being a top or bottom is irrelevant. They just want to have sex and leave!

    Why do you think it's weird? If two guys are in love and they're in the privacy of their own home, I don't see the problem with hugging.
  • GraffitiMySou...

    Posts: 139

    Feb 10, 2013 6:46 PM GMT
    I love hugging a guy and showing him affection when there are feelings involved. For some reason though, I feel uncomfortable when I am being hugged icon_eek.gif
  • PolaroidSwing...

    Posts: 1131

    Feb 10, 2013 8:46 PM GMT
    I really like hugs; but I hate massages. Something about it just creeps me out, regardless of who's doing it, or in what context.

    Tickling too. It puts me in instant panic mode; I've accidentally struck people who wouldn't stop.
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    Feb 10, 2013 8:49 PM GMT
    That's interesting. Not sure how the bottom aspect comes into this. Maybe you're the nurturing type?
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    Feb 10, 2013 8:59 PM GMT
    GraffitiMySoul26 saidI love hugging a guy and showing him affection when there are feelings involved. For some reason though, I feel uncomfortable when I am being hugged icon_eek.gif


    Somewhere in your past, you learned that you didn't like hugging so look deeper into it if you want to know why. As for guys in the future that you come in contact with, be upfront with them from the beginning about anti-hugging. So what if they think it's weird. You've set an expectation and they need to respect that.
  • Jerebear

    Posts: 329

    Feb 10, 2013 9:03 PM GMT
    Dont feel weird. We all have touch issues of one kind or another. I dont mind hugs, but they do nothing at all for me, and I hate the smothering kind or hugs that go on too long. I love being massaged, especially my scalp. My stylist gives me these hard deep massages when she's washing my hair that is better than 99.5% of the sex I've ever had. Like PolaroidSwinger, I hate being tickled and will get violent.
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    Feb 10, 2013 11:24 PM GMT
    Someone once said to me "A hug is a symbol of trust." Another person I once knew said "A hug means 'I want to be with you'." I've always wondered about both of those.