I need to work on talking to people in clubs! >:(

  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Mar 04, 2013 5:05 AM GMT
    Last night, I was out with a friend at a gay bar, and I just learned that I am awkward in social settings (even though I talk to strangers all the time at work. I guess it's totally different).

    Also, I dunno when I should let my guard down at times. I was in the restroom when a guy said "Hi!" to me, but I was soooo buzzed and my main focus was finding an open stall cuz I needed to pee really badly. He was kinda cute too, and I totally blew him off. icon_cry.gif
    (In my defense, what kind of person chats you up while you're in a stall anyways?...)

    But there are a couple of things I learned from that experience and also by looking it up online:

    -Drink some liquid courage, but not so much that you become retarded or boisterous.
    -Keep in mind that the people there are shy too.
    -Also, have the clean intention of making friends.
    -Know the difference between confidence and being a douchebag.

    I'll need more tips, brethren. I'm planning to go out next week to apply it IRL.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Mar 04, 2013 6:06 AM GMT
    I have the same exact problem. I just freeze over, especially when it's a super hot guy.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Mar 04, 2013 6:08 AM GMT
    Yeah, social anxiety is rough.

    On a related note, is it awkward to go to a gay nightclub or something similar by yourself just to talk to people?
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Mar 04, 2013 7:49 AM GMT
    ry77 said-Also, have the clean intention of making friends.


    Presumeably the guys you want to talk to at clubs are the attractive ones. Who are you fooling with the "friends" approach?

    Of course, many guys like to be surrounded with hot platonic friends, but I doubt u would want to announce that.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Mar 04, 2013 2:57 PM GMT


    This right here: "(even though I talk to strangers all the time at work. I guess it's totally different). "

    Try talking to strangers just like you do at work. icon_wink.gif
  • Rawrdo

    Posts: 343

    Mar 05, 2013 4:13 AM GMT
    OneFish saidYeah, social anxiety is rough.

    On a related note, is it awkward to go to a gay nightclub or something similar by yourself just to talk to people?


    Yes it is. But it is more awkward when you feel like dancing, and it takes like 2-3 songs of you dancing by yourself in all shame and glory until someone takes the bait and dances with you.

    Back on topic, from my own personal experience, I've seen that guys tend to talk to other guys if they're or standing near the bar while sipping on a drink. I'm not sure if the drink is a red flag, or if it makes you look vulnerable (hey, you're drunk!) but it works.So I recommend you order something and take tiny bird sips.

    P.S the success rate is not as high as the bend and snap, maybe you should try that too icon_razz.gif.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Mar 05, 2013 8:08 AM GMT
    OneFish said...
    On a related note, is it awkward to go to a gay nightclub or something similar by yourself just to talk to people?


    Uhh, I did that. I found someone that grinded on me with his raging boner, but I was not attracted to him at all. Talk about awkward. Never again.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Mar 05, 2013 8:12 AM GMT
    raoul22 said
    ry77 said-Also, have the clean intention of making friends.


    Presumeably the guys you want to talk to at clubs are the attractive ones. Who are you fooling with the "friends" approach?

    Of course, many guys like to be surrounded with hot platonic friends, but I doubt u would want to announce that.


    Well, in the article, you're not really searching for someone. This is just a way to get up courage to talk to people in general. It said talk to anyone. Then you just ease your way up into talking to guys. And then hot guys. icon_smile.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Mar 05, 2013 8:20 AM GMT
    Rawrdo said
    OneFish saidYeah, social anxiety is rough.

    On a related note, is it awkward to go to a gay nightclub or something similar by yourself just to talk to people?


    Yes it is. But it is more awkward when you feel like dancing, and it takes like 2-3 songs of you dancing by yourself in all shame and glory until someone takes the bait and dances with you.

    Back on topic, from my own personal experience, I've seen that guys tend to talk to other guys if they're or standing near the bar while sipping on a drink. I'm not sure if the drink is a red flag, or if it makes you look vulnerable (hey, you're drunk!) but it works.So I recommend you order something and take tiny bird sips.

    P.S the success rate is not as high as the bend and snap, maybe you should try that too icon_razz.gif.


    Hmm I'll try that. I think I scare people away with my exotic drunk dancing. I think I should tone it down too... icon_confused.gif

    lol Bend and snap? Psh! My coworker said she would drive her ex crazy when she bends over then shakes her ass while slowly getting back up. icon_lol.gif