Advice?

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Mar 11, 2013 12:35 AM GMT
    Hey all, first time poster.
    Ive been kind of struggling with the whole concept of meeting other men. There are the obvious websites you can browse but it seems like everyone's very into the scene. (Not that theres anything wrong with that, its just not for me.)
    I'm also a pretty shy, 'straight acting' dude, as I would assume alot are. But how do you pick that out of a crowd?

    Unless you visually appear gay, the only alternatives are gay bars, websites, and that's about it.

    Ive just been having no luck and its frustrating.
  • jtz03932

    Posts: 200

    Mar 11, 2013 12:47 AM GMT
    Like I said before in a previous post... asking for relationship advice in realjock (full of men showcasing their 6-pack topless photos) is like asking a blind man how to do architectural drawings.
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    Mar 11, 2013 1:04 AM GMT
    Well, first of all, great pic by the way, so putting that out there is a sure way of attracting all the healthy fit guys from RJ who might be attracted to you.
    As to your other question about finding fellow closeted guys like yourself, or I mean, straight acting. Go the therapy sessions for people dealing with self hatred issues?
    Look there are all sorts of people, gay, straight and even some argue there is this new, unfounded form of sexuality termed "bisexual" that is some sort of waiting room for either soon to be gay, or married with children living in a home with a hot woman until you just can't take lying anymore and business trips to hit on hot guys on the websites the OP is trying so hard to avoid.
    My point is this, if you want to be gay and healthy and find love, do what I did, what every healthy, grounded, normal, educated, financially secure, non-addicted, fit man does.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Mar 11, 2013 1:36 AM GMT
    Read this....

    http://www.realjock.com/gayforums/1290038
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Mar 11, 2013 6:23 AM GMT
    By "appear[ing] gay", are you referring to the horns or the wings?


    So you're shy, don't do the dating websites, don't go to gay bars, and are 'straight acting.'
    I get that hiding in a crowd is your your shtick, but how do you expect to meet anyone that you want to date or who might want to date you when you live like this?
    Dude, you are so f***ed.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Mar 11, 2013 6:31 AM GMT
    I think the gym is a pretty good place to start, granted not all men are gay at the gym but you will have a lot better luck there then any other places I can think of that's in public and isn't part of the gay scene.
  • 1blind_dog

    Posts: 376

    Mar 11, 2013 6:37 AM GMT
    smartmoney saidWell, first of all, great pic by the way, so putting that out there is a sure way of attracting all the healthy fit guys from RJ who might be attracted to you.
    As to your other question about finding fellow closeted guys like yourself, or I mean, straight acting. Go the therapy sessions for people dealing with self hatred issues?
    Look there are all sorts of people, gay, straight and even some argue there is this new, unfounded form of sexuality termed "bisexual" that is some sort of waiting room for either soon to be gay, or married with children living in a home with a hot woman until you just can't take lying anymore and business trips to hit on hot guys on the websites the OP is trying so hard to avoid.
    My point is this, if you want to be gay and healthy and find love, do what I did, what every healthy, grounded, normal, educated, financially secure, non-addicted, fit man does.


    Damn...blunt. to the point, and something you probably needed to hear (whether you listen to it now or later). Granted I was out to a few people and had a few gay friends at the time, when I left small town Illinois and moved to St. Louis I got a job at a gay bar. I could have easily gone for any number of straight bars but I specifically put myself in a job situation that would force me to become more familiar and comfortable with what I was.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Mar 11, 2013 8:55 AM GMT
    oh really,op look kinda gay though,keep looking,there is plenty of fish.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Mar 11, 2013 9:13 AM GMT
    Macaque said...
    So you're shy, don't do the dating websites, don't go to gay bars, and are 'straight acting.'
    I get that hiding in a crowd is your your shtick, but how do you expect to meet anyone that you want to date or who might want to date you when you live like this?
    Dude, you are so f***ed.


    Yikes!
    I knew when he described himself as "straight-acting," he would be getting responses like this. Poor guy! icon_cry.gif


    *gets popcorn*
  • stratavos

    Posts: 1831

    Mar 11, 2013 4:34 PM GMT
    pmkb saidHey all, first time poster.
    Ive been kind of struggling with the whole concept of meeting other men. There are the obvious websites you can browse but it seems like everyone's very into the scene. (Not that theres anything wrong with that, its just not for me.)
    I'm also a pretty shy, 'straight acting' dude, as I would assume alot are. But how do you pick that out of a crowd?

    Unless you visually appear gay, the only alternatives are gay bars, websites, and that's about it.

    Ive just been having no luck and its frustrating.


    there was an answer to this in a movie.... well tons of them, but take the "mambo italiano" route and go join the gay help line on weekends, or kids help phone ;)
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Mar 11, 2013 6:04 PM GMT
    Basically you want your cake and eat it too. IT NEVER WORKS.!

    You can't stay closeted and expect to meet people and have an active social "straight-acting," gay social life.

    Sooner or later you are going to have to take the plunge. For your own sake, make it sooner rather than later. The gay shelf life is short-lived.
  • calibro

    Posts: 8888

    Mar 11, 2013 6:36 PM GMT
    sorry, when i open my mouth unicorns having buttsecks with rainbow purses come out cumming confetti and glitter. can't help you bro.