Grammar Help, Please?


  • Mar 29, 2013 2:51 AM GMT
    Hey everyone, I am working on editing a couple of things, but there just a few of these sentences me and my boyfriend are unsure of. There seems to be conflicting opinions online, and in our textbooks, about which one is correct. I'm gonna keep it short, these are the sentences causing us to stumble...

    1)Original: We utilize proven training methods which are measurable, observable and repeatable by recording data and improving overall fitness & wellness.

    My Thoughts: I feel that, "...which are measurable, observable and repeatable..." Would be considered a prepositional phrase, and then a series of items, I feel this would be the best way to write it...

    We utilize proven training methods, which are measurable, observable, and repeatable, by recording data and improving overall fitness & wellness.

    2) Original: Our general physical preparation does not specialize in one aspect of fitness, HOWEVER, we do specialize in improving our goals and performance regardless of our respective specialties.

    My Thoughts: Remove the Coma after fitness, and either insert a period or semicolon, as it is a subordinate conjunction.

    3) You do all the work and you change yourself, we are here to guide you and teach you throughout your fitness journey.

    My Thoughts: I feel like there should be a semicolon after, "yourself"

    I'm sorry to bug you, but I am confused by all the rules, I have been at this for hours... Several of us all have conflicting opinions about it.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Mar 29, 2013 3:16 AM GMT
    Here's my cleaned up version:

    1. We use proven training methods that are measurable, observable, and repeatable by recording data and improving fitness and wellness.

    2. Our general physical preparation does not specialize in one specific area of fitness. We do specialize in improving our goals and performance, regardless of individual specialties.

    3. You do all the work and change yourself. We are here to guide and teach you throughout your fitness journey.

    Never use ampersands ( & ) and try to avoid semicolons (a period usually suffices).
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Mar 29, 2013 4:00 AM GMT
    No one uses the word "utilize". Throw it out icon_wink.gif
  • GWriter

    Posts: 1446

    Mar 29, 2013 12:51 PM GMT
    yourname2000 said
    wonofakind saidNo one uses the word "utilize". Throw it out icon_wink.gif

    Good catch....replace with the simple "use".


    Yes, and "that" instead of "which" in the first sentence, as TallNYguy pointed out.
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    Mar 29, 2013 1:05 PM GMT
    southernkid105 saidHey everyone, I am working on editing a couple of things, but there just a few of these sentences me and my boyfriend are unsure of. There seems to be conflicting opinions online, and in our textbooks, about which one is correct. I'm gonna keep it short, these are the sentences causing us to stumble...

    Correction: . . . my boyfriend and I. . . .

    1)Original: We utilize proven training methods which are measurable, observable and repeatable by recording data and improving overall fitness & wellness.

    My Thoughts: I feel that, "...which are measurable, observable and repeatable..." Would be considered a prepositional phrase, and then a series of items, I feel this would be the best way to write it...

    It's fine, but it is what is called an adjective or relative clause.

    We utilize proven training methods, which are measurable, observable, and repeatable, by recording data and improving overall fitness & wellness.

    2) Original: Our general physical preparation does not specialize in one aspect of fitness, HOWEVER, we do specialize in improving our goals and performance regardless of our respective specialties.

    My Thoughts: Remove the Coma after fitness, and either insert a period or semicolon, as it is a subordinate conjunction.

    Correction: . . . fitness; however, we. . . .

    3) You do all the work and you change yourself, we are here to guide you and teach you throughout your fitness journey.

    My Thoughts: I feel like there should be a semicolon after, "yourself"

    You are correct.

    I'm sorry to bug you, but I am confused by all the rules, I have been at this for hours... Several of us all have conflicting opinions about it.
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    Mar 29, 2013 1:07 PM GMT
    TallNYguy saidHere's my cleaned up version:

    1. We use proven training methods that are measurable, observable, and repeatable by recording data and improving fitness and wellness.

    2. Our general physical preparation does not specialize in one specific area of fitness. We do specialize in improving our goals and performance, regardless of individual specialties.

    3. You do all the work and change yourself. We are here to guide and teach you throughout your fitness journey.

    Never use ampersands ( & ) and try to avoid semicolons (a period usually suffices).


    Semicolons are used all the time, especially in higher level writing.
  • calibro

    Posts: 8888

    Mar 29, 2013 1:16 PM GMT
    Hey everyone, I am working on editing a couple of things, but there missing verb just (extraneous adverb) a few of these (unfinished parallelism) sentences me and my boyfriend (should be my boyfriend and I) are unsure of. There seems to be conflicting opinions online, and in our textbooks, (commas unnecessary)about which one is correct. I'm (be parallel in your decision to use or not to use contractions) gonna keep it short, (comma splice) these are the sentences causing us to stumble... (use a colon)

    1) We utilize proven training methods (that without a comma or which preceded by a comma... that is the better choice) are measurable, observable and repeatable by recording data and improving overall fitness & wellness.

    2) Our general physical preparation does not specialize in one aspect of fitness, (this must be semicolon or period) HOWEVER, we do specialize in improving our goals and performance regardless of our respective specialties.

    3) You do all the work and you change yourself, (period. the reason a semicolon doesn't work is because the first isentence is made up of two independent clauses [if you read them as imperatives]; the second independent clause, which is trying to mirror the pronoun imperative structure, consists of one independent clause and a phrase. if you want to use a semicolon, you need to add a we before "teach you") we are here to guide you and teach you throughout your fitness journey.

    and for the record, there is nothing conflicting about these rules in any grammar text i've come across.