Why is there always a "groom" in lesbian weddings?

  • highforthis

    Posts: 681

    Apr 02, 2013 2:12 AM GMT
    One of my friends was making fun of a short dude's "lesbian suit", which got me thinking... with gays, neither groom wears a dress, so...
  • AMoonHawk

    Posts: 11406

    Apr 02, 2013 2:17 AM GMT
    Because real men wear kilts

    mcgillion_weddingkilts.jpg

    g-hq440a33dcf23cb.jpg
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    Apr 02, 2013 2:20 AM GMT
    TV - typical lesbian wedding prettied up for mass consumption while pandering to straight men's fantasies:
    15n7l9y.jpg

    REALITY - me with the "groom" at my first lesbian wedding circa 1987:
    4r9lhj.jpg
  • PolaroidSwing...

    Posts: 1131

    Apr 02, 2013 2:35 AM GMT
    Lesbian culture ≠ gay male culture.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Apr 02, 2013 2:57 AM GMT
    Why is there always a "groom" in lesbian weddings?

    highforthis saidOne of my friends was making fun of a short dude's "lesbian suit", which got me thinking... with gays, neither groom wears a dress, so...

    I'm not sure about the "always".

    I attended a lesbian commitment ceremony in Seattle in 1996, at a house of some gay friends. It was performed by a Lutheran minister, though at that time it had no legally binding status.

    I learned that the couple hadn't arranged for any photographer. They didn't have a lot of resources, why their wedding was at someone's house. So I asked a professional photographer friend of mine (also gay) to donate his services, and he later gifted them with a photo album. While I did the video taping myself for free, giving them the edited tape as a gift (one of my degrees is in TV & radio).

    So that I know there wasn't any "groom", they were both brides. In fact, I have been to many gay & lesbian weddings over the years, and men are both grooms, and women are both brides. I've seen some pictures where some lesbian couples dress one of them as a groom, but I think that's less common. So saying there is "always" a groom in a lesbian wedding isn't accurate.
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    Apr 02, 2013 6:28 AM GMT
    Simple, the groom is the gal who has the most talent with the vibrator or the use of her tongue playing the more "masculine" role. But some couples are versatile, hence the photo above.icon_wink.gif
  • calibro

    Posts: 8888

    Apr 02, 2013 6:42 AM GMT
    let's make as many stereotypes against lesbians as we can...
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    Apr 02, 2013 6:45 AM GMT
    calibro saidlet's make as many stereotypes against lesbians as we can...


    They did invent tire slashing!
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    Apr 02, 2013 6:59 AM GMT
    Anocxu said
    calibro saidlet's make as many stereotypes against lesbians as we can...


    They did invent tire slashing!


    They're all vegetarians and cat lovers that Drive Pickup Trucks.
    They also only wear flannels and overalls except for when they're at work (which is usually as a PE Tacher at an all female school).
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    Apr 02, 2013 7:22 AM GMT
    Anocxu said
    calibro saidlet's make as many stereotypes against lesbians as we can...


    They did invent tire slashing!

    I think that's just with you.
  • Medjai

    Posts: 2671

    Apr 02, 2013 7:25 AM GMT
    Slim2010 said
    Anocxu said
    calibro saidlet's make as many stereotypes against lesbians as we can...


    They did invent tire slashing!


    They're all vegetarians and cat lovers that Drive Pickup Trucks.
    They also only wear flannels and overalls except for when they're at work (which is usually as a PE Tacher at an all female school).


    They're all handy, and never shave. Anything.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Apr 02, 2013 7:30 AM GMT
    highforthis saidOne of my friends was making fun of a short dude's "lesbian suit", which got me thinking... with gays, neither groom wears a dress, so...

    See, you do drunky postings like these and then when you sober up you'll moan; "I was drunk when I wrote this and please please please forget it." At that point someone will say it's too late (with a black woman rolling her eyes gif) and someone else will call you a wet brain.
  • highforthis

    Posts: 681

    Apr 03, 2013 1:12 AM GMT
    calibro saidlet's make as many stereotypes against lesbians as we can...


    But it's true of many if not most lesbian weddings! Why follow heteronormative traditions, when gays don't?
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    Apr 03, 2013 1:15 AM GMT
    What does it matter; unless you've going to be in the wedding!
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    Apr 03, 2013 2:04 AM GMT
    Medjai said
    They're all handy...

    I must be hanging around with the wrong lesbians. Cause I'm the one they ask to work on their cars, fix household items, set up their home entertainment systems, solve computer problems for them, etc.

    One stereotype I do sometimes see is opposites pairing, more frequently than gay men do. One is often clearly the feminine lipstick lesbian, the other the manly diesel dyke. But as I posted earlier above I've yet to see a wedding ceremony with one in men's attire, though I know that happens, just not "always".
  • highforthis

    Posts: 681

    Apr 03, 2013 4:27 AM GMT
    upstart_brophet saidWhat does it matter; unless you've going to be in the wedding!
    icon_biggrin.gif


    I'm just curious! I even googled this question, and the answers were like "they wear whatever feels comfortable for them". Hell, I wanna wear pajamas to my wedding!
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    Apr 03, 2013 6:15 PM GMT
    I'm just wondering how much time elapsed between the U-Haul and the Alter.