any Vegans or Vegetarians dating Meat eaters?

  • Nico3687

    Posts: 108

    Apr 04, 2013 7:08 PM GMT

    If you're a vegan or vegetarian dating a meat eater, what is your reaction to your BF's meals?

    Do you think nothing of it, silently get disturbed by it, or make a snide comment, or do/say something else?

    Eating animals totally offends my values (moreso now that the "honeymoon" phase is over) especially when he orders a ground up highly processed low quality item (ie sausage) and when its from a fast food restaurant where you know the animal was mistreated during its entire life.

    However, I don't want to sacrifice an amazing 1 year and going strong relationship over it. Basically looking for others that are dealing with this same issue. How do you make it work???

  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Apr 04, 2013 7:12 PM GMT
    Does a vegetarian or a vegan refuse to swallow cum on principle?
    icon_question.gif
  • Nico3687

    Posts: 108

    Apr 04, 2013 7:16 PM GMT
    Upper_Cdn saidDoes a vegetarian or a vegan refuse to swallow cum on principle?
    icon_question.gif


    It depends, but sometimes. If you are turned off by what goes into someone's body it's hard to want what comes out.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Apr 04, 2013 7:34 PM GMT
    I imagine life would become quite intolerable for you both if everytime he eats he totally offends you. He could become vegetarian, or he could dump you.


    I'm not sure I would bet on a relationship where watching your partner eat offends you, and the thought of taking his cum is gross to you. icon_wink.gif



    Mixed marriages (Male - female; vegetarian, onmivore; democrat -republican) are fraught with peril.
    icon_surprised.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Apr 05, 2013 2:58 AM GMT
    Unless his meal were in my house, it would be none of my business.

    My lacto-vegetarian habit is for reasons of health, hygiene and aesthetics, not ethics, and so I do not feel compelled to impose it upon others outwith my own four walls.

    You could try cooking him some really nice vegetarian meals.

    I like Indian vegetarian cooking. Paneer butter masala and gobi manchurian are two restaurant-style dishes from the subcontinent which show the full taste and texture potential of vegetarian gourmet cooking.

    They are substantial enough to satisfy any meat-eater. His digestive system is used to processing heavy foods, and so he might need nuts, cheese and heavy fats in order to feel satisfied.

  • jo2hotbod

    Posts: 3603

    Apr 05, 2013 9:58 AM GMT
    Where do meatheads fit in?
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Apr 05, 2013 4:43 PM GMT
    being a meat eater, i tolerated dating a vegitarian once..... it was OK. but i just could never cook for him. too picky. i just want to grill small animals.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Apr 05, 2013 4:47 PM GMT
    jo2hotbod saidWhere do meatheads fit in?


    tumblr_md95uagwKT1qck737.gif
  • Nico3687

    Posts: 108

    Apr 05, 2013 4:55 PM GMT
    jonnyboy saidbeing a meat eater, i tolerated dating a vegitarian once..... it was OK. but i just could never cook for him. too picky. i just want to grill small animals.


    Wow, you must have a real healthful diet if you could never cook for him icon_rolleyes.gif

    Fortis said

    You could try cooking him some really nice vegetarian meals.


    Oh I do, cooking is one of my favorite hobbies. The issue centers around it happening sometimes (it isn't often, fortunately, as I surely would not be okay with that).

    Just seeing how others are dealing with it....
  • vodka_cran

    Posts: 21

    Apr 05, 2013 5:15 PM GMT
    I personally don't have any issue with people eating meat around me. I view that as a personal choice, and you cannot force someone to give something up. I still eat fish and dairy, but no other meat. If someone asks why I have made my choice, I am happy to explain and share my perspective. Its been an interesting topic when I go out on dates, and it is always very nice when one of them goes out of their way to make food that I can eat.

    My only request is that if we go out to dinner, we go someplace where I have at least a few options, ie: no bbq.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Apr 05, 2013 5:17 PM GMT
    Nico3687 said
    jonnyboy saidbeing a meat eater, i tolerated dating a vegitarian once..... it was OK. but i just could never cook for him. too picky. i just want to grill small animals.


    Wow, you must have a real healthful diet if you could never cook for him icon_rolleyes.gif

    Fortis said

    You could try cooking him some really nice vegetarian meals.


    Oh I do, cooking is one of my favorite hobbies. The issue centers around it happening sometimes (it isn't often, fortunately, as I surely would not be okay with that).

    Just seeing how others are dealing with it....




    sounds to me like you have issues....... and an attitude.
  • MarvelBoy23

    Posts: 279

    Apr 05, 2013 5:27 PM GMT
    Nico3687 said
    If you're a vegan or vegetarian dating a meat eater, what is your reaction to your BF's meals?

    Do you think nothing of it, silently get disturbed by it, or make a snide comment, or do/say something else?

    Eating animals totally offends my values (moreso now that the "honeymoon" phase is over) especially when he orders a ground up highly processed low quality item (ie sausage) and when its from a fast food restaurant where you know the animal was mistreated during its entire life.

    However, I don't want to sacrifice an amazing 1 year and going strong relationship over it. Basically looking for others that are dealing with this same issue. How do you make it work???



    While it may offend your values, his values are obviously different. I'm assuming you wouldn't like a religious fanatic pushing their morals on you? You have to learn to live and let live. If you give up a, in your words "amazing" relationship because you don't want to accept what he likes, he certainly doesn't have to accept what you like.

    Is he offended by your meals? And also, did you get into this relationship knowing full well he is a carnivore? If so, I'd say it's genuinely not fair to pull that card out now!
  • Nico3687

    Posts: 108

    Apr 05, 2013 5:33 PM GMT
    jonnyboy said
    sounds to me like you have issues....... and an attitude.

    Only towards douchebags
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Apr 05, 2013 5:45 PM GMT
    Nico3687 said
    jonnyboy said
    sounds to me like you have issues....... and an attitude.

    Only towards douchebags


    ditto.icon_biggrin.gif
  • imbrad

    Posts: 377

    Apr 05, 2013 5:59 PM GMT
    Nico3687 said
    jonnyboy said
    sounds to me like you have issues....... and an attitude.

    Only towards douchebags


    My ex wasnt a vegitarian but food did drive a wedge between us after a while. At a certain point our habits and desires simply werent lining up. He actually broke up with me over macaroni and cheese. It was home made but his picky ass palate wouldnt allow him to just be comfortable. Of course there were more underlying issues but not being able to eat together in peace certainly harmed our relationship.

    My friends have been together for 3 years, one is veg one is not. They eat primarily veg but it is clear who makes more concessions in that area. As an outside observer it is frustrating watching one person make so many decisions for the couple based on his preference...

    You need to find more peace in your choices or your boyfriend will never meet you in the middle. There is clearly frustration in your situation and that needs to be worked out of your relationship. Food is fundemental. Two different people can come together but if they cant eat together, well...
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Apr 06, 2013 3:54 AM GMT
    My cousin's wife is vegan, her husband and four kids not. She cooks and serves them their meals and makes her own, choosing not to impose her preferences, feeling it's a matter of personal choice. They've been married almost 20 years. Oddly, she's the one plagued by myriad health issues.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Apr 06, 2013 4:03 AM GMT
    I'm lactovegetarian (for all meals I cook; however, if I go out, I'm not as picky as long as we aren't eating out more than once or twice a week) for health reasons, but I don't impose my diet on others. I just ask for them to respect mine. I grew up learning not to impose my diet on others, but my family always worked hard to meet my requests. It's hard though because I never want to eat out...especially after working in food service. Do you know that trans fat free cooking oils still have significant amounts of trans fat? Partially hydrogenated oil is still on the label in quantities less than 0.5g per 1 Tbsp, and mono- and diglycerides can be hydrogenated fatty acids, but this currently isn't required to be on a food label. Food service establishments are primarily there to make money; what a customer doesn't know can't hurt them...or can it!?

    I honestly think if you are breaking up over food habits, that sounds really petty, frankly. Get over it and agree to disagree.
  • MrPapo317

    Posts: 515

    Apr 06, 2013 4:09 AM GMT
    my bf is a vegetarian. we dont have any conflicts. i cook most of the time and when i cook i make dishes without meats. the only meat i usually eat is chicken and i add that only to my dishes when i eat and leftovers for work. he has no issue with it.

  • Nico3687

    Posts: 108

    Apr 07, 2013 10:27 PM GMT
    imbrad said There is clearly frustration in your situation and that needs to be worked out of your relationship. Food is fundemental. Two different people can come together but if they cant eat together, well...


    It boils down to a difference in values in this regard.

    Which is the whole point of my question.... (HOW do others approach this divide)
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Apr 07, 2013 10:38 PM GMT
    vodka_cran saidI personally don't have any issue with people eating meat around me. I view that as a personal choice, and you cannot force someone to give something up. I still eat fish and dairy, but no other meat. If someone asks why I have made my choice, I am happy to explain and share my perspective. Its been an interesting topic when I go out on dates, and it is always very nice when one of them goes out of their way to make food that I can eat.

    My only request is that if we go out to dinner, we go someplace where I have at least a few options, ie: no bbq.


    I dated an omnivore for over two years while I was vegetarian (I am no longer), and it was exactly like this. We'd often cook vegetarian meals together, but this didn't seem to bother him in the slightest. Thing is, we were both in grad school and meat is relatively expensive so it's not like he was cooking it all that often anyway. When we went out, he'd get meat, I'd get something veggie, again no problem.

    If you respect each other it can really be a complete non-issue.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Apr 07, 2013 10:41 PM GMT
    Yep. It is not a problem. He hates vegetables and fruits, but loves bacon, steak, hamburger, and chicken.

    I will make him a meat version of what I am cooking, and he will in turn make me vegetarian meals. It does not bother me. icon_biggrin.gif

    I had a boyfriend that was an asshole about it, and said that it was fucked up and shitty. He did nothing but talk shit every time meals came out.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Apr 07, 2013 10:46 PM GMT
    I'm mostly vegetarian, not for moral reasons just for some reason I dislike the taste of almost all meat. I guess that puts me on the "picky" eater side, which someone might find annoying! Especially if they like to dine out constantly.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Apr 07, 2013 11:07 PM GMT
    I've been a lacto-ovo vegetarian for about 20 years now. I realized that my chances of meeting a non vegetarian is significantly high. I never had a problem eating out with friends who were not vegetarian. Even during my relationships, i always stated my case clearly that i will never turn to eating meat. I would not impose my diet on my bf cause i believe this is considered a personal choice. I believe if people want to become vegetarian they have to really do it for themselves, not for other people.

    When we go out to eat, there were certain cuisines that i couldn't have but we still made it work. Does it bother me that he eats meat? No, cause it really comes down to your mindset. As long as he can handle me being a vegetarian its a win win situation for both of us!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Apr 07, 2013 11:11 PM GMT
    OP....I've been a Vegetarian since I was 12. I've only had 3 relationships that have been of 3 yrs or more each. All 3 were with carnivores. It's a balancing act. They all knew that I was a Vegetarian for the right/ethical reasons. And that I choose to not participate in the needless suffering of animals.
    They all grew up, as most do, in the ignorant bliss and safety of not really wanting to know what happens to animals just so people can kill them and eat them.
    I gave them a choice....to either allow me to show them the horror that's inflicted on animals or not.
    If they chose to see the ugly truth of what really goes on, and still decide to eat this flesh, then we would no longer be together.
    If they chose not to see the ugly truth, then we would not discuss it again. However, we would NOT preach or criticize the other for their choice. None of them chose to see the truth.

    As for friends it's a 50/50 split. Half Vegetarians and the other half not. We really have no issues. When I have them over during the warmer months, they can bring their own flesh to prepare and eat. Otherwise they eat the Vegetarian meals I have served.

    I have to tell you though....Vegans? Wow! Now you guys are a whole different story. Even I can't get along with them at times. LOL!

    Just do what YOU feel comfortable with and can handle. You will meet real douchebags like "jonnyboy" who will say ignorant/despicable things such as he did eariler....." i just want to grill small animals."...just to annoy you. Write these scumbags off. You will find that these loudmouthed dicks are usually the ones in the worst health. (For example on bigmouth's profile? He lists a 36" waist. Umm, yeah. The dead flesh is doing him a world of good.icon_wink.gif )

    Be around who you feel most comfortable with and deal with it. Don't point fingers and preach.

    Tristan
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Apr 08, 2013 2:58 AM GMT
    Unless you want to be single forever don't be a little bitch.