Yeah... You really should work on that anger... It's making you completely irrational...
...As much as I love Yourname and Tanker .. I'll say this..
you do not need to be comforted or appeased....You need HARD REALITY..!!!..This is you throwing a CHILDISH TEMPER TANTRUM !!
..Who the Hell do you think you are with intent to punish gay men for what happened to YOU??
Of all the actions and thoughts you could have chosen....
You immediately resorted to hate and violence ..Towards your Own... And then turned around to ask US for help??? REALLY??
...You feel the NEED to punch someone really bad !!??
When I got cheated on .. I blamed myself for CHOOSING a DUFUS !!..
See..anger is not getting the best of you...It's just finally settling where it belongs.. You are almost comfortable with being totally irrational..?? "I hate myself lately and I just want to punch someone"
When I hate ME.. I punish ME..
Your opening post shows very little motivation in claiming any responsibility other than ..'you feel bad for feeling bad'
..You are not the first person in the world to be cheated on and you won't be the last..
As much as I'd love to Grab you..Hug you... and give you the broadest shoulders to cry on..
..I'll tell you.. There is no fix for this kind of rage..
You have to assume some responsibility for what occurs with the man You Chose !
..He broke YOU..and Now You are Breaking YOU!!..
Isn't that just more broken pieces for YOU to put together??At what point will you look yourself in the mirror and say.."No More".. "I will no longer carry around this bullshit burden"???
PS.. I'm so sorry you have to go through this...