Scared of going to sleep early? WHY?!?!? Severely ruining my life! Can't be in bed before 6 am!

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    Apr 15, 2013 4:31 PM GMT
    Okay, so basically... I hate going to sleep early. I have ever since I was a kid. I was never given a bedtime, so I never would wake up for school. So I left school to just sleep during the day. I now work full time, 2 pm til 10 pm every night which means I can go to bed at 6 am and still get 6 hours sleep before I have to get up at 12 pm, just enough to function.

    My problem is now, that this has affected for too long. And I hate where I live, and I hate my job. And for me to move on I need to be able to go to sleep early to wake up to be able to go to work at like 7 am at a normal job. Right now I should be in bed...

    But it just feels like a waste of time. I don't want tomorrow to come, like i'm trying to stop it by staying awake. All my friends will just finish work and go to bed... and i don't understand how...

    I don't know if this is mental, or physical or what. But I just want to be normal! I love how dark and quiet the night is, daytime is so bright and busy! And when I stay up for 24 hours... I might fall asleep at like 11 pm. but ill wake up 3 hours later at like 2 am and be awake again til 6 or 7 am.

    WHY AM I LIKE THIS!?!?!!?
  • Fable

    Posts: 3866

    Apr 15, 2013 4:37 PM GMT
    your circadian rhythm has become nocturnal. Do some research on changing your sleep pattern. There's plenty of information out there.
  • Tombo

    Posts: 355

    Apr 15, 2013 4:48 PM GMT
    I've got a similar problem mate, it sucks

    I have tried pretty much every bit of advice several times (not looking at bright screens in the evening/slowly staggering the bed time/hot baths/herbal teas/ meditation/ guided relaxation/and countless other things, nothing has worked!!!
  • MikeW

    Posts: 6061

    Apr 15, 2013 4:49 PM GMT
    Of course none of us are going to know *why* you're like that. Have you seen a Dr., counselor or psychologist? I assume there are sleep specialists who might be able to help but I don't know. Also don't know if you could afford them. icon_sad.gif

    Obviously this is a serious issue, though. It is negatively impacting your quality of life. There are things I could suggest like both working out and meditation but I have no idea how much they would help if any. If at all possible you need real life professional help with this.
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    Apr 15, 2013 5:46 PM GMT
    MikeW saidOf course none of us are going to know *why* you're like that. Have you seen a Dr., counselor or psychologist? I assume there are sleep specialists who might be able to help but I don't know. Also don't know if you could afford them. icon_sad.gif

    Obviously this is a serious issue, though. It is negatively impacting your quality of life. There are things I could suggest like both working out and meditation but I have no idea how much they would help if any. If at all possible you need real life professional help with this.


    Agree with this.

    On one hand, the issue of being a night person over a morning person is normal. Some people are just wired that way. It's hell for me to get up at 7:30 am for work, but would have no problem staying up until 3 in the morning on any given night.

    In your case, it sounds like you have some depression issues mixed in as well. You really should speak with a therapist that specializes in either sleep disorders or depression.

    Meditation can help quiet the mind to make it easier to sleep (if insomnia is a problem) and regular exercise can be useful in maintaining a normal sleep cycle.
  • kevmoran

    Posts: 1543

    Apr 15, 2013 6:50 PM GMT
    I have the same issue, but I'd advise against sleeping pills. It becomes addictive and it's basically a low grade sedative. My solution has been to stay up all night and day, two nights if necessary so that I am exhausted and don't allow myself to pass out until 10pm, then I wake up at normal human hours, and I'm good for weeks on that schedule. When I fall off schedule again, I repeat.

    If you're willing to do something less legal, adderall is not that expensive on the street and is a good way to help temporarily when you're changing your sleep schedule. But just like the sleeping pills, they can be addictive so it's a slippery slope.
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    Apr 15, 2013 7:24 PM GMT
    Kristoff said
    WHY AM I LIKE THIS!?!?!!?


    Maybe you're a vampire? icon_idea.gif (OH!!!...sorry...icon_razz.gif)

    nosferatu (2)
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    Apr 15, 2013 7:28 PM GMT
    I consider myself to have a normal sleeping pattern but there's nothing like wearing myself out at the gym or a good day's surfing to get to bed and sleep like an angel as early as 9.45 pm (happened this Sunday!).

    I think you'd benefit from finding activities that you can spend your energy in, let the body ask for its well-earned rest and.... actually give it to him!! FB and RJ and the other things you keep busy with during the night time will still be there the next day =)

    Good luck, hope you can sort this out!
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    Apr 15, 2013 7:30 PM GMT
    Easiest way I've "adjusted" my sleep schedule. Move west. I'm in North America's Central Time Zone. When I spend time on our west coast, I'm up two hours earlier, and I go to bed two hours earlier. If you move east you'll have the opposite problem. Get a job in Perth.
  • EricCub

    Posts: 23

    Apr 15, 2013 7:45 PM GMT
    If I read your message right, you're not having trouble falling asleep but actually getting yourself into bed. I have the exact same problem. I just don't want to/feel like going to bed. And I don't. Even though I know I should. I argue with myself about it, but I feel like there's a part of me that's still five years old whining about not wanting to go to bed... and that part keeps winning.%0
  • He_Man

    Posts: 906

    Apr 15, 2013 8:07 PM GMT
    Like others have stated, sleep disorders are sometimes symptoms of underlining health-related concerns, especially mental health issues.

    I have suffered from clinical depression my whole life, and like I mentioned in a previous topic on depression, my major symptom is sleeping all of the time. If I experience a traumatic experience - stress at work, relationship crisis, death of a loved one, etc.- I will automatically get so tired that I'll fall asleep where ever I'm at. I could literally sleep all day and all night if I could get away with it.

    Again, as I mentioned in the earlier discussion, I got addicted to caffeine, sports drinks and weight-loss supplements because I relied on them just to make it through the day, which was counterproductive because they created a vicious cycle. After they wear off, you become even more lethargic and sleepy, thus worsening your sleep problems.

    I don't know you personally, but I am interested in knowing if you have ever been to a counselor, therapist or psychiatrist. I'm not trying to say that you do indeed have a problem, but 50% - 80% of people suffering from depression, anxiety, BPD, ADHD or other mental health disorders are affected with sleep disorders compared to only 10% - 18% of the general population.*

    There are many ways you can help resetting your internal clock - The Circadian Cycle - with or without drugs. I said this many times before, and it's worth repeating here again. Exercise, exercise and more exercise! A healthy body is a healthy mind. Proper nutrition and exercise are crucial for mental well-being. Certain foods can have toxic effects on brain chemistry, like too much sugar in ones diets and many chemicals that are found in processed foods. Try to eat plenty of nutritious foods that feed the body and the mind, and then engage in vigorous exercise to help stimulate the circulation and gets the blood pumping, which increases blood circulation to the brain, not to mention releasing a lot of "feel good" hormones and endorphins. Plus, if you workout hard enough, your body will be exhausted and you'll be forced to fall asleep.

    Another helpful tip, and something so simple, is not to eat, watch television or do anything in your bed other than sleep! I know many people are going to be like WTF! But for those of us suffering from sleep disorders, it's a must. If you only sleep in your bed, and nothing else (well, except for sex, of course) you train your body/mind to only view bedtime as something for sleep. If you are reading, watching television or eating in your bed, then your body/mind views the process of lying down as an activity which requires mental alertness, not something that requires relaxation and rest.

    You can also train your body/mind by wearing the same bed clothes each night that you go to sleep, thus programing the mind to anticipate sleep. Don't wear your sleeping clothes for anything else but sleep. When you put them on, you psychologically signal your body that it's time to go asleep.

    You could also try melatonin to help reset your Circadian Rhythm. It's natural, non-habit forming and inexpensive. Take it an hour or two before you sleep, and it should help calm the mind and make you stay asleep throughout the night.

    Meditation is another alternative you can try, and believe me, I always fall asleep whenever I try to meditate. Whenever you meditate, you try to clear your mind of all thoughts, and if one happens to come by, then you release it and try to focus on emptying your mind again. It's just an act of mental house cleaning, which helps clean out all of the clutter and chatter in the mind. Every time you have a thought, you let it pass and re-focus on the inner peace and stillness of the mind. Don't force it, tho, or it won't be meditation and will likely drive you mad. Just go with the flow until you fall asleep naturally.

    If all else fails, then you could always work nights and have an opposite sleep schedule as everyone else and just get a night time job. I actually did that a couple of years ago. I worked at a hotel as a night manager, so I went into work at 11:00pm and got home about 8:00am. If you can't make your body do what you want, then create your life around it.


    * http://www.health.harvard.edu/newsletters/Harvard_Mental_Health_Letter/2009/July/Sleep-and-mental-health
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    Apr 15, 2013 9:18 PM GMT
    Kristoff saidOkay, so basically... I hate going to sleep early. I have ever since I was a kid. I was never given a bedtime, so I never would wake up for school. So I left school to just sleep during the day.


    If this is ever an indictment of laissez-faire parenting I don't know what is. But that's not what's being discussed here; the damage is already done.

    So...might I ask what exactly are you afraid of? Responsibility? You might want to speak with a therapist.
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    Apr 15, 2013 9:29 PM GMT
    I have always been a night owl, but I can adapt to being an early bird, if I want to. I have recently started getting up at 6am to do my cardio workout, before I go to work. It's hard, but a lot easier after a good night's sleep. If you are physically tired, you tend to fall asleep more easily.
  • MikeW

    Posts: 6061

    Apr 15, 2013 9:30 PM GMT
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    Apr 16, 2013 12:15 AM GMT
    Also a night owl here, sometimes with extreme night owlism. Getting to sleep early used to be stressful when I was a kid in school. I think that might have contributed to my current dreaming practices because I spent so much time in a hypnagogic state that I'd play with my mind there. Hey, if I'm not sleeping I might as well amuse myself.

    I've read varying theories on night owlism, ranging from labeling it a sleep disorder to simply being a different chronotype. And I suppose it can be either. I tend to think it is mostly looked at as a disorder because it doesn't synch with most of society. But also [url] http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Night_owl_(person)[/url] shows that "A survey of over 400 adults showed approximately 15% morning people, 25% evening people, and 60% intermediates"

    So it turns out that while it might not just be quite natural, but even more prevalent than being an early riser, it's the night owls who are at odds with society's 9 to 5.

    All we can hope for is that one day they let night owls marry each other and that we're no longer discriminated against in the workplace when we come in, you know, five hours late.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Apr 16, 2013 1:16 AM GMT
    What about discipline? Make yourself do it even though you don't want to.

    Sounds like that will be a big uphill battle considering it doesn't sound like you received much discipline as a child.
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    Apr 16, 2013 1:24 AM GMT
    Probably way too much personal information, but I have no secrets....

    I was told repeatedly I would burn in hell for being gay when I was a kid. Therefore, I have always dreaded going to bed because I'm afraid I won't wake up. So I end up falling asleep on the sofa (which is a torture device for your back) instead of going to my Temperpedic Queen sized bed. icon_sad.gif
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    Apr 16, 2013 1:27 AM GMT
    Trollileo said
    Scruffypup saidProbably way too much personal information, but I have no secrets....

    I was told repeatedly I would burn in hell for being gay when I was a kid. Therefore, I have always dreaded going to bed because I'm afraid I won't wake up. So I end up falling asleep on the sofa (which is a torture device for your back) instead of going to my Temperpedic Queen sized bed. icon_sad.gif
    I love couches. So comfortable.


    I guess you missed the part about mine being a torture device. Seriously, it will break your back and fuck up your neck.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Apr 16, 2013 2:11 AM GMT
    If left unchecked, I'm a night owl.

    During a week of no power with Hurricane Sandy I immediately defaulted to day person - up with the sun, in bed shortly after sunset. My body clock did a complete, immediate 180. Since the hurricane I've opted to go to bed two hours earlier than usual and am trying to cut it down to three. Point is, for me at least, when being a night owl became both inconvenient and impractical it was very easy to become a morning person. It wasn't about any internal clock, it was about what I wanted.
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    Apr 16, 2013 2:50 AM GMT
    oh lord....icon_sad.gif

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    Apr 16, 2013 3:40 PM GMT
    Hmmmm, thanks for the advice guys. Right now I should be in bed but I'm just not tired... And I don't want to go to bed! I don't believe in depression or any mental illness's (It's basically just an attention seeking technique to me) so I don't have anything like that. I just wish I could force myself to go to bed! And if I don't feel ready I won't sleep! It's so annoying!

    The reasons i think I maybe like this though is

    1. I'm afraid the next day will come

    2. The inner child in me still doesn't want to go to sleep

    3. I feel like it's the biggest waste of time

    4. It's the fear of having no control, I can't control my surroundings when I'm asleep

    5. Night time is so much more peaceful and quiet

    6. I'm afraid I won't wake up

    And there's a few ore that will come to me...
  • HarborFighter

    Posts: 32

    Oct 27, 2015 4:03 AM GMT
    Perhaps you should consider looking at this in a completely different way. Why do you think it is abnormal? Perhaps it's not. Maybe it's just the way your body and mind work. That is what I believe about myself. I spent years thinking there was something wrong with me because I did not go to bed before 3am, often staying up until 4 or 5am. I have done a complete about-face at this point in my life and I am happier than ever. I have deeply accepted that I am this way and that nothing is wrong. Like you, I LOVE the quiet of the night when my husband is in bed and I have the rest of the house to myself. He has also accepted this about me. And when I join him in bed in the middle of the night or the wee hours of the morning, it is pure heaven!

    Someone, in all the replies to you, suggested moving west. Even moving to Perth. This does not work. This does not change who you are and how your inner clock works. It doesn't change it at all. If you DO relocate to an extreme-west location you will, of course, experience the need to go to bed earlier for a while...a few days, maybe even weeks. But you are simply going through jet lag. Jet lag is by no means a permanent condition and your body will eventually return to the exact same pattern as before.

    I live in Australia, having moved here in July of 2013. I love the nights here. We are in a period right now (springtime) when birds are extremely active. The Magpies are now singing straight through the night. They have a hauntingly beautiful voice that sounds like a distant soft flute. I am lucky to be part of this. And the birds are just one of the many things I have learned about because of my night-liveliness.

    Embrace it, my man. Accept it. There is nothing wrong with you.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Oct 27, 2015 11:54 AM GMT
    ^^
    Giving an advice answer to a question over 2 years old ? ? ?
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Oct 27, 2015 7:46 PM GMT
    I'm usually up late myself, and can't for the life of me wake up before 9 am. It's always a struggle. The only times I can get up at 7 am is when I used to have court lol. And even then....I'd be running to get there.

    That's why it's not worth gettin into the legal field. They make you wake up too damn early
  • Webster666

    Posts: 9217

    Oct 27, 2015 10:25 PM GMT
    I take a Clonazepam (prescription), 2 Motrin, and a Tylenol PM.
    Then, my brain shuts up, so I can go to sleep.