Yes! i did sucks in gay bar

  • glen1231

    Posts: 8

    Apr 29, 2013 3:35 PM GMT
    remember a thread posted here similar like "10 gay things should stop". and this one pretty much reflects to me. "begin to hate everyone in gay bar, but got frustrated when no one hits me up". it makes me feel like myself like an arrogant bitch when i m alone in gay bar. i darenot to open my mouth in front of someone i like, but i do dare refuse someone ugly and short who come to me to talk. where does it come from?! im not like that in real life. maybe that's my inside bitch.
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    Apr 29, 2013 3:40 PM GMT
    glen1231 said i darenot to open my mouth in front of someone i like, but i do dare refuse someone ugly and short who come to me to talk. where does it come from?! im not like that in real life. maybe that's my inside bitch.


    Um, apparently you ARE like that in real life...it is also your "outside" bitch.
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    Apr 29, 2013 4:48 PM GMT
    Maybe alcohol is the instigator so here's the solution...stop going to gay bars! If you're still an inside bitch outside the bars, then you know it's really you!
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    Apr 29, 2013 5:35 PM GMT
    lol

    at least you have a better understanding as to why so many guy's here are single.
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    Apr 29, 2013 6:40 PM GMT
    What you are describing is the place 90% of guys in a gay bar go to. Nothing unusual. But just treat everyone with dignity and respect, even if you think they are ugly.
  • Karl

    Posts: 5787

    Apr 29, 2013 8:39 PM GMT
    that thread title is really confusing omg.
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    Apr 29, 2013 8:43 PM GMT
    seekonk saidWhat you are describing is the place 90% of guys in a gay bar go to. Nothing unusual. But just treat everyone with dignity and respect, even if you think they are ugly.


    +1

    if you are a bitch to a random person, some where in time your bitch side will come out in your relationship. And no one likes a bitch, unless you were on all fours. icon_rolleyes.gif
  • AMoonHawk

    Posts: 11406

    Apr 29, 2013 8:57 PM GMT
    Are men more attracted to you when you act like a bitch or do they secretly talk amongst themselves how they are going to jump you when you leave late one of these nights and gang rape you .... be nice and leave early ... there ain't nothing left at closin' time
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    Apr 29, 2013 9:00 PM GMT
    Sometimes people in gay bars pester guys who come in on their own and as long as you were polite the first couple of times, you should be forgiven for getting stroppy with them if they persist. Don't be the guy who gets guilt tripped into bed with someone you don't find attractive (and yes, it happens all the time).
  • thegaymessiah

    Posts: 214

    Apr 30, 2013 5:13 AM GMT
    Try to build connections with people more naturally... most gay bars are sociopathic drama pits lmao.

    find a guy you like by talking to a place with similar interests, try to drop them a private msg online and see what happens... try to see what u have in common or if you just fine each other incredibly interesting. Be wary of people who try to get too close too fast (huge sign of an abuser) but also stay away from people who don't try to get to know you in any way at all. Either extreme is bad.

    a lot of ppl like to say that love comes from within the person individually, it doesn't have anything to do with others. But when you think about it, why would hate be any different? If you truly do hate other people, you probably don't like something in yourself... maybe you're mad at fitting a stereotype. idk i get that a lot, an otherwise very masculine normal gay guy has this really "gay" (as in both lame and nerdy) alternative interest and they are so worried they will be judged for it or something, and they hate the really stereotypical flamer guys that bring that out... and meanwhile they have these intense romantic crushes on straight/bi dudes who do underground gay stuff but don't come out of the closet as gay because that would be well, gay.

    so a lot of times the gay bars are ways for gay men to work on their own self-hatred issues by hating others, and it probably for a while feels like a sweet release to release that hate out into the world... but it isn't, just causes more bad shit.

    and the love you want maybe it doesn't start out as love or the amazing female pop song love that gay guys tend to want. maybe it just starts with easing up on people a bit, as rupaul said to raven "If you let people be who they are, you'll be surprised at how much a relationship can grow." You are mad at yourself and others because you want them to be different, more of the cool str8 man jock and less of the gay nerd drama lame-tards average run of the mill boring gay guy like most of us are. But everybody needs love not just the special people.

    THE MORE YOU BLOOOOW.

  • RichLather

    Posts: 73

    Apr 30, 2013 5:30 AM GMT
    I went to nine bars in WeHo this weekend and not a single guy talked to me. I am so over it. Meh.
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    Apr 30, 2013 5:33 AM GMT
    RichLather saidI went to nine bars in WeHo this weekend and not a single guy talked to me. I am so over it. Meh.


    Well, they're missing out, for sure!!

    In reference to the thread. . . I didn't understand what I read. icon_confused.gif
  • He_Man

    Posts: 906

    Apr 30, 2013 5:46 AM GMT

    You are fearing that which you project onto others. You said that you don't dare talk to guys that you like... Uhm... Maybe it's because you are afraid of them doing to you what you are doing to those who are "ugly and short."

    Sometimes we are our worst enemy. Internally, we can be catty, mean and nasty little bitches. We're like "good gawd, I hope no thinks of me the way I think of them." This kind of mind set is brought on because we are extremely judgmental of others, and we think that others are just as judgmental of us as we are of them, and fortunately, this is not always the case.

    Try being a little less judgmental of others, and I guarantee you that you'll be less intimidated by people and will have an easier time talking. If you actually go into a bar with the mindset that "I hate everyone," then guess what? You're committing a self-fulfilling prophesy. You lost the game before you even started playing it, so why even bother going out. People can read your subtle body mannerisms, such as your arms and legs being crossed, your constant stares to the ground and the general off-putting nature of how you stand. Open your body up, smile and at least act like you like being there (fake it til you make it), and I promise you, guys will come up to you to talk to you. Hell, you may actually get to take one home for the night.
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    Apr 30, 2013 5:58 AM GMT
    glen1231 saidremember a thread posted here similar like "10 gay things should stop". and this one pretty much reflects to me. "begin to hate everyone in gay bar, but got frustrated when no one hits me up". it makes me feel like myself like an arrogant bitch when i m alone in gay bar. i darenot to open my mouth in front of someone i like, but i do dare refuse someone ugly and short who come to me to talk. where does it come from?! im not like that in real life. maybe that's my inside bitch.


    Ugly and short? Doesn't that describe most men in China?