Hopelessly single

  • FitGwynedd

    Posts: 1468

    Apr 29, 2013 11:23 PM GMT
    Why is gay life so lonely? All my straight friends are in relationships, and serious ones at that. I'm 22, single, and no one even wants to date me, am I already washed up and undateable?
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    Apr 29, 2013 11:26 PM GMT
    no

    you're fine.
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    Apr 29, 2013 11:27 PM GMT
    FitGwynedd saidWhy is gay life so lonely? All my straight friends are in relationships, and serious ones at that. I'm 22, single, and no one even wants to date me, am I already washed up and undateable?


    Ugh, please don't turn into one of those whiny posters. You are just having a bad day. Suck it up, sleep on it, and tomorrow will be a better day....
  • FitGwynedd

    Posts: 1468

    Apr 29, 2013 11:30 PM GMT
    jmusmc85 said
    FitGwynedd saidWhy is gay life so lonely? All my straight friends are in relationships, and serious ones at that. I'm 22, single, and no one even wants to date me, am I already washed up and undateable?


    Ugh, please don't turn into one of those whiny posters. You are just having a bad day. Suck it up, sleep on it, and tomorrow will be a better day....


    I've felt like this for months and its been intensifying over the past several weeks, so no, I won't sleep on it, because I will be just as lonely tomorrow as I am now.
  • deep388

    Posts: 859

    Apr 29, 2013 11:33 PM GMT
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  • AMoonHawk

    Posts: 11406

    Apr 29, 2013 11:39 PM GMT
    Are you really lonely are are you just longing to be in a relationship. Baby, don't be so anxious to jump into one? Do you not know many gay men? What are you doing in your life to try and find another guy?
    You are not the only one in the world who feels lonely. You just haven't met the right guy yet. Concentrate more on having fun with friends and expanding your circle of friends and the rest will fall into place.
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    Apr 29, 2013 11:43 PM GMT
    Be more open minded
  • FitGwynedd

    Posts: 1468

    Apr 29, 2013 11:43 PM GMT
    AMoonHawk saidAre you really lonely are are you just longing to be in a relationship. Baby, don't be so anxious to jump into one? Do you not know many gay men? What are you doing in your life to try and find another guy?
    You are not the only one in the world who feels lonely. You just haven't met the right guy yet. Concentrate more on having fun with friends and expanding your circle of friends and the rest will fall into place.


    All of my friends don't stay out late and get drunk anymore, they go home to their girlfriends and boyfriends. Yeah, that whole 'you haven't met the right guy yet' is like waiting for a train at a station where they already removed the tracks.
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    Apr 29, 2013 11:46 PM GMT
    You're ready to give up at 22? If what you're currently doing to meet guys isn't working, then change it. Dating for gays will always be more difficult than dating for straight people. We have a much smaller group of potential candidates and we have a lot more obstacles to overcome. You'll have to accept that as fact. You can take inspiration from the older couple who have been together many years and met when gay dating was a lot harder than it is now. If they found each other, then you can find the right guy for you too.
  • FitGwynedd

    Posts: 1468

    Apr 29, 2013 11:48 PM GMT
    DudeInNOVA saidYou're ready to give up at 22? If what you're currently doing to meet guys isn't working, then change it. Dating for gays will always be more difficult than dating for straight people. We have a much smaller group of potential candidates and we have a lot more obstacles to overcome. You'll have to accept that as fact. You can take inspiration from the older couple who have been together many years and met when gay dating was a lot harder than it is now. If they found each other, then you can find the right guy for you too.


    How can I change it though?
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    Apr 29, 2013 11:49 PM GMT
    FitGwynedd saidHow can I change it though?

    That depends. How are you trying to meet guys now?
  • AMoonHawk

    Posts: 11406

    Apr 29, 2013 11:58 PM GMT
    FitGwynedd said


    All of my friends don't stay out late and get drunk anymore, they go home to their girlfriends and boyfriends. Yeah, that whole 'you haven't met the right guy yet' is like waiting for a train at a station where they already removed the tracks.


    LOL I love that train station analogy.
    You didn't say what you are doing to expand your circle of friends.
    It sounds like your friends have moved on to a new life, time for you to do the same. You can't go back .... only forward.
  • chadwick1985

    Posts: 391

    Apr 30, 2013 12:04 AM GMT
    You are young and good looking, you aren't undatable.

    Give it time, put your self out there. Advertise you are looking for dates and not hookups. We've all done it, meet up with a guy for a 'date' get that feeling then hookup. Now it is hard to meet up with that guy and go on a date because all that is on the mind is sex.

    You will find someone trust me.
  • FitGwynedd

    Posts: 1468

    Apr 30, 2013 12:05 AM GMT
    DudeInNOVA said
    FitGwynedd saidHow can I change it though?

    That depends. How are you trying to meet guys now?


    Every way I can. Active in the local gay society, socialise with gay people in the community, and although I don't have much faith in it, I also try online.
  • FitGwynedd

    Posts: 1468

    Apr 30, 2013 12:11 AM GMT
    AMoonHawk said
    FitGwynedd said


    All of my friends don't stay out late and get drunk anymore, they go home to their girlfriends and boyfriends. Yeah, that whole 'you haven't met the right guy yet' is like waiting for a train at a station where they already removed the tracks.


    LOL I love that train station analogy.
    You didn't say what you are doing to expand your circle of friends.
    It sounds like your friends have moved on to a new life, time for you to do the same. You can't go back .... only forward.


    Well I would like to, but obviously they are maturing in life because they have partners, and I don't. I'm not doing very much to expand my circle of friends, but I always tend to make new friends here and there.
  • calibro

    Posts: 8888

    Apr 30, 2013 12:43 AM GMT
    no one wants to date a dramatic whiner who thinks the world ends at 22 because he's single (except emo boys)
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    Apr 30, 2013 12:47 AM GMT
    LOL

    You can create intelligent community. Join the gay soccer, hockey, basketball, or bowling league. (This site Real Jock, after all.)

    Join a supper club.

    Hit pool parties.

    Hit the gym.

    Queers are everywhere, Dude.

    Quit fucking whining.

    Get off the computer, and enter The Real World.

    Go to after hours after some gay clubs.

    Volunteer.

    Join match.com or a true dating site.

    Join gay.com.
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    Apr 30, 2013 12:51 AM GMT
    FitGwynedd saidEvery way I can. Active in the local gay society, socialise with gay people in the community, and although I don't have much faith in it, I also try online.

    It's difficult for me to give you specific suggestions because I don't know your part of the world. In general, cast as wide a net as possible, meaning meet guys as many ways as you can. We're in the minority, and you're going to have to try harder than a straight person to meet someone. Don't give up. You're young, and you have many years yet to find someone. I know it can be discouraging. Don't let it get you know. People usually prefer to be with someone with a positive attitude anyway. Fake it 'till you make it if you have to, but keep trying.
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    Apr 30, 2013 12:52 AM GMT
    FitGwynedd saidWhy is gay life so lonely? All my straight friends are in relationships, and serious ones at that. I'm 39, single, and no one even wants to date me, I am washed up and undateable!


    I corrected it so it would apply to me. Maybe that will make you feel better. Dude you're 22. It may not seem like it now but a lot of life is to be lived from 22 to 39. So start your b/f hunt now and make yourself noticeable! icon_wink.gif
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    Apr 30, 2013 12:54 AM GMT
    70% of gay men are single in all age groups, except under 30's who are 90% single.

    Don't compare yourself to straight people. Most straight guys get into relationships only because that's the only way for them to get laid regularly. Were straight women like us, most straight people would be single and you wouldn't suffer by comparison.
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    Apr 30, 2013 12:56 AM GMT
    It is normal for a given gay guy to be single because there are a lot less gay guys around so you have less opportunities to meet the right guy. Don't compare yourself to straight friends and don't think you can't mature as a single person. Look at all those people who get in a relationship then watch reality tv for 40 years!
  • MikeVmax

    Posts: 32

    Apr 30, 2013 12:58 AM GMT
    Learn to be happy with yourself. Relationships aren't magical happy pills that will make all your worries go away.
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    Apr 30, 2013 12:59 AM GMT
    FitGwynedd saidWhy is gay life so lonely? All my straight friends are in relationships, and serious ones at that. I'm 22, single, and no one even wants to date me, am I already washed up and undateable?


    Your twenty two dude, you have time.
    If you're Forty four and still single, then worry about it.
  • Whipmagic

    Posts: 1481

    Apr 30, 2013 1:06 AM GMT
    GigoloAssassin said
    FitGwynedd saidWhy is gay life so lonely? All my straight friends are in relationships, and serious ones at that. I'm 22, single, and no one even wants to date me, am I already washed up and undateable?


    Your twenty two dude, you have time.
    If you're Forty four and still single, then worry about it.


    And even at age 44 life is still not over. I'm 43, broke up with my partner three years ago, and now slowly getting back into dating. It's still possible, but admittedly harder than when I was in my twenties.
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    Apr 30, 2013 1:10 AM GMT
    We all feel that way sometimes. But keep your head up. You're a cutie. You'll find someone great.