"Gay mountain biker" is an oxymoron.

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 01, 2013 3:29 AM GMT
    Add in "freerider" and "downhiller" and the oxymoron grows to exponential proportions, though that's the type of riding I enjoy the most.

    I'm pretty sure many of you have noticed the decline in my forum activity. The thread title explains why.

    Since I've taken up this new hobby (on Oct 16 2012, to be exact), I've yet to find even one [out] gay man other than myself who enjoys it...aside from a couple XC guys on the forums here. Even on the trails - although the guys I meet are completely accepting of my sexual orientation - not even one has given the slightest hint that he might be gay (and my 'gaydar' has been proven time and time again to be quite accurate).

    This leaves me no other choice but to assume that the stereotype of gay men is mostly correct...that they're mostly females born with male genitalia.

    One would think that a site named "realjock" would harbor gay men who actually enjoy things that "normal" men enjoy. But when it comes to extreme/adrenaline sports, the vast majority of gay men fall short of the glory.

    I hate to say this concludes my time with RJ, but it really does. Looking at the other sports-related threads confirms this. They're nothing more than gay men who mildly participate in sports in hopes of landing a lay with some hot guy. It's quite sad, actually.

    Although i'm currently seeing a guy who enjoys mountain biking (and have been since last Sept), I'm on the edge of denouncing my sexual orientation and adopting the classification of "straight but don't like girls" among my hetero peers, even though they know me as being gay. I just feel like my demeanor and interests are not conducive to "gay" as society knows it.
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    May 01, 2013 11:09 AM GMT
    OK, this is about as lame as I've seen. I happen to enjoy mt biking and use to go all the time (my relationship and relocation has slowed down my biking).

    I use to mt bike with my roommate, he's gay also. The idea that there are no others on RJ is total BS.

    You're new to MB so you've made it your life's priority, that's great but the rest of us do it occasionally intermixed with other responsibilities and has nothing to do with our being gay enough to be both on RJ and a MB'er.

    Also, having been MBing since October 2012 hardly puts you in the category of 'extreme', obsessed perhaps but NOT extreme.

    I agree, it's time for you to say goodbye. You've failed the gay test by drawing on your stereotypical comparison that gay guys can't be sports oriented. Have a great ride...good bye.
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    May 01, 2013 11:13 AM GMT
    eb925guy saidOK, this is about as lame as I've seen. I happen to enjoy mt biking and use to go all the time (my relationship and relocation has slowed down my biking).

    I use to mt bike with my roommate, he's gay also. The idea that there are no others on RJ is total BS.

    You're new to MB so you've made it your life's priority, that's great but the rest of us do it occasionally intermixed with other responsibilities and has nothing to do with our being gay enough to be both on RJ and a MB'er.

    Also, having been MBing since October 2012 hardly puts you in the category of 'extreme', obsessed perhaps but NOT extreme.

    I agree, it's time for you to say goodbye. You've failed the gay test by drawing on your stereotypical comparison that gay guys can't be sports oriented. Have a great ride...good bye.

    This. Just because the OP does not find a gay rider it means none exist. Kind of funny actually. I can't find a gay doctor, which obviously means I should never seek medical care...
  • Whipmagic

    Posts: 1481

    May 01, 2013 11:52 AM GMT
    paulflexes said
    This leaves me no other choice but to assume that the stereotype of gay men is mostly correct...that they're mostly females born with male genitalia.

    One would think that a site named "realjock" would harbor gay men who actually enjoy things that "normal" men enjoy. But when it comes to extreme/adrenaline sports, the vast majority of gay men fall short of the glory.

    I hate to say this concludes my time with RJ, but it really does. Looking at the other sports-related threads confirms this. They're nothing more than gay men who mildly participate in sports in hopes of landing a lay with some hot guy. It's quite sad, actually.

    Although i'm currently seeing a guy who enjoys mountain biking (and have been since last Sept), I'm on the edge of denouncing my sexual orientation and adopting the classification of "straight but don't like girls" among my hetero peers, even though they know me as being gay. I just feel like my demeanor and interests are not conducive to "gay" as society knows it.


    I can only shake my head reading this, or laugh out loud. Paul is turning his gay card in...
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    May 01, 2013 11:57 AM GMT
    lol OP is just exaggerating but I think I get his point somewhat. The activity in the sports thread pale in comparison to other threads on RJ. Of course there are some members who are into sports here although they may not be so active on the thread . I was happy to meet 2 people that I can enthusiastically engage martial arts with from here.(better than none lol)



    and now that Jason Collins have come out................ icon_wink.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 01, 2013 12:07 PM GMT
    People always forget that gays constitute 4-5% of total population.
    Try finding out the %age of mountain bikers, mathematically it will come down to such a low number that it isn't surprising that you are finding it hard to find some gay mountain bikers.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 01, 2013 12:22 PM GMT
    Also like to trail ride here, and have other gay friends that do. Not sure how much talking there is to do about it other than to say "I went, it was fun."
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    May 01, 2013 12:26 PM GMT
    I often don't tell gay people I'm gay if I find them annoying and want them to go away . . . . just saying, it is a possibility
  • DanOmatic

    Posts: 1155

    May 01, 2013 12:43 PM GMT
    I'm a pretty athletic guy--am still a nationally ranked athlete, and manage to make the podium at a variety of sports. Sure, I'm aware that I'm one of the very few gay guys doing what I do, but I have great support by my non-gay teammates, so it's really a non-issue. What I do find is that in the gay community where I live, there is little appreciation for real athletic pursuits. By that, I mean athleticism as a core way of life, rather than going to the gym for aesthetic reasons only (you know the type: pre-disco biceps pump and then lighting up a cigarette upon exiting the gym).
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    May 01, 2013 12:56 PM GMT
    DanOmatic saidBy that, I mean athleticism as a core way of life, rather than going to the gym for aesthetic reasons only (you know the type: pre-disco biceps pump and then lighting up a cigarette upon exiting the gym).


    There is a bar in Chelsea in NYC called "Gym" which markets itself as a sports bar. It has a fenced in area which I call "the playpen" outside the front door which is always full of guys smoking. The irony is not lost on me.

    1f67c681-759c-4fe7-b34e-91d0cc2cb6eb_h.j
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    May 01, 2013 1:24 PM GMT
    Most people in general shy away from any strenuous sporting activity. The most they like is to go to the gym where they don't have to get dirty, won't get sunburned, and can shower afterwards. Have you ever noticed at the beach almost no-one is actually moving their bodies? Even the ones in the water just sort of stand there motionless. I moved to Canada thinking I'd find hardy people who like to hunt. I've found few like that. Most just complain about the cold while refusing to wear a hat lest their $100 hair cut get messed up. People in general are wimps, gay and straight alike.

    As gay becomes mainstream one can hope that gay kids will not feel excluded from sports, scouting and outdoors, and other boyhood things, and will grow up with the normal expectations of marriage and children.
  • CAtoFL

    Posts: 834

    May 01, 2013 1:24 PM GMT
    If you want to ride, just ride. If you want to meet gay guys, join a gay softball league.
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    May 01, 2013 1:33 PM GMT
    I like Paul but this post is stupid.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 01, 2013 1:45 PM GMT
    ...or move to a state that has mountains or at least isn't flat, and then while you're at it, find a therapist who specializes in gay shame - preferably one who believes there's no such thing as a hopeless case because OMG if this post and your profile don't completely add up to the classic textbook definition of - I'll use the fancy term here - internalized homophobia, I don't know what does. Also, with 34,486 posts, my hunch is that the OP won't be disappearing from RJ.
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    May 01, 2013 2:07 PM GMT
    paulflexes said
    Since I've taken up this new hobby (on Oct 16 2012, to be exact), I've yet to find even one [out] gay man other than myself who enjoys it...

    Although i'm currently seeing a guy who enjoys mountain biking...



    So... this guy is in the closet?








  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 01, 2013 2:45 PM GMT
    Reads like something Freedomisntfree would write. Next you'll be 'dining away the gay' at Chick-Fil-A.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 01, 2013 2:46 PM GMT
    Dont_TLDR.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 01, 2013 2:51 PM GMT
    I hardly noticed your abscence.

    You contributed nothing of value but inane comments to the forums anyway. Maybe you have more to offer the mountain bike community.

    Good luck in all your future endeavors.
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    May 01, 2013 3:22 PM GMT
    I have a slightly opposite experience. The majority of mtn bikers I know are gay men (and a few lesbians). And I met most of them on different occasions. I had the same thoughts about rock climbing for the first few years I did it.

    I think the reason I felt that way is because climbing is such a huge part of my life. I invested a lot of time into climbing and the fact is that while others may enjoy climbing, they may not invest as much time into the sport as I did...

    Plus, putting gaydar aside, factor in focus. When I am climbing or at the gym or out rollerblading, I am not necessarily looking for every single gay person in the vicinity. I am there to climb and often times my sexuality or theirs does not come up in conversation. I am normally looking for some good beta on tough route or info on routes to try out. I definitely do not approach people like "I'm gay. Can I borrow some chalk?" Even if people know you are gay, it seems the focus is less on sexuality and more on the sport.

    I definitely empathize with your stance though. It can be challenging to identify gay men with similar interests, but that doesn't mean they are not present. Patience...

    If all else fails, make a public display like wearing a tiara and tutu. icon_lol.gif

    Good luck!
  • muscsportsguy

    Posts: 133

    May 01, 2013 3:36 PM GMT
    The OP's post is so dumb that I almost think it's a joke. And it hardly dignifies a response. Plenty of gay guys like to do "normal" stuff (which couldn't be a more offensive term if you tried). If you're seeing a guy who shares the same interest as you, then you've been disproving your own damn point for as long as you've been seeing him.
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    May 01, 2013 3:37 PM GMT

    The irony of this posting is how I came to discover RealJock. I had just moved to Charlotte and took up mountain biking. I was having a hard time making gay friends so I search the web to find a site for gay athletes. I had such great hope when I found RealJock but as I soon discovered it is more about politics, vanity and guy above you threads. Still I think the site surve a good purpose, even though it has nothing to do with jocks.

    For those who don't know Paul here, he has no internalized homophobia. It is just a frustration I think many gay men who take up sports feel. You can find plenty of gay swim teams, volleyball and softball players, but it thins out quickly from there. There's now a Gay surfer site:

    gaysurfers.net

    and a gay outdoor site:

    http://gayoutdoors.org

    These sites don't get nearly the traffic that a faux jock site like this does. The founder of gaysurfers had to draw a line to keep it from being a hookup site for guys into surfers. When I joined gayoutdoors I found little to no activity in the forums looking for someone to do an outdoor sports with but the forum for guy look to get naked outdoors was always active. Go figure.

    Try moving to a new city and discovered how hard it is to make new gay friends period, never mind finding one that shares an athletic interest. If he is not attracted to you than the chances of a friendship developing are quite slim. If he is attracted to you but you have no interest in having sex with him than his motivation to get together with you will quickly fade.

    I took up whitewater kayaking in Charlotte and quickly developed a social circle with fellow (straight) paddlers. Whitewater kayaking is a team sport since you need to set shuttle and rescue each other if something goes wrong. It is a great way to bond with others. You don't choose your friends based on how hot they are but how reliable you find they are. Imagine that. Age isn't a problem either. A lot of the guys I paddled with were 20 years younger simply because so few guys my age take up a new sport like that. It made me realize gay men put up a lot of unnecessary obstacles to bonding.

    So while Paul's tongue and cheek post, I'm sure you've experienced a similar frustration trying to develop a gay social life in a new city.


  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 01, 2013 3:46 PM GMT
    I just want to ride with people having similar commitments and capabilities irrespective of age, gender, faith, race, wealth, sexuality.......
  • mascmuscle35

    Posts: 79

    May 01, 2013 3:48 PM GMT
    Where do you mountain bike in St Petersburg Florida?
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    May 01, 2013 3:48 PM GMT
    I'll be sure and tell the group of 30 guys that went with me to Bishop for three days of intense bouldering and sport climbing that they are not, in fact, gay. There is nothing quite like seeing a super flamboyant guy go up and crush some tough problem that a Straight Jock was thrashing and grunting on earlier. I'll also tell my friend who just summited Shasta on a harder-than-standard route and then skied down. I'm sure that will go over really well.
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    May 01, 2013 4:07 PM GMT
    "Gay mountain biker"is an oxymoron...


    ...so is "a pretty lesbian" icon_wink.gif