Macaque saidI don't know why you assume that people only have friends to do drugs and party. Some people make friends playing games, work out with friends, to concerts with friends. You find things you like doing and you meet others with similar interests.
It's probably not an issue if you don't act like it's an issue. It means you'd have more time to spend with a guy you're dating.
If I went on a date with a guy and he said he had no friends, it would raise a warning flag. It wouldn't be a deal breaker, but it would get me thinking.
I never stated that those are the only people who have friends or those are the only activities people are into. I just brought that up because here in Vegas where I live, the majority of guys are interested in that lifestyle. Not that it's bad but like I said, I'm not a "life of the party" type of person. And yes, I have tried meeting people through interests but it never worked out for too long so that's all I meant in saying that I just have a hard time connecting with people.
And again, there are times where I just don't mind going places on my own. Heck, for my 19th birthday, I went to a concert all by myself. Weird at first but I got relaxed once the bands started playing. So I guess part of me just got used to being all by myself.
But okay, that's fair that you would raise suspicion on the guy. At least you're honest.
VenkyjockWell! I think this may not be a problem if you give him an impression that you are ok for him to move with his friends, else this may be the Hidden dragon later. This is what most men fear for if i am not wrong. And for future, strike a balance in your relationship unlike you end up being alone at home, while he is out with his friends mostly or you end up realizing that he is not spending his time with you even if he is meeting his friends rarely.
RJ is a Friendly and a fun place Lot of Good people to talk to via Forums especially during hard times which is what I have learnt.
Oh well speaking for myself, I would have no problem if my boyfriend wanted to go hang with his friends. I have hobbies of my own that can hold my interest in so it really wouldn't be a problem haha.
Adorexiathe entire concept of having no friends is a little foreign to me, so it would definitely raise my curiosity. I wouldn't call it a deal breaker but it doesn't begin things on a good start. Personality would probably be the 'moment of truth' , if the guys all clingy, low confidence, etc etc (probably more common among ppl with no friends) it would kill my buzz, and reinforce the reasoning of why this person has no friends. So...make sure you don't act like you fit into that stereotype, and things will go better.
I think it's a little bit unfair of a generalization to assume that guys with friends have the traits you described but I won't argue because well... There is truth to it. I can admit that I don't have the most confidence in myself (It varies really, some days I feel proud and tall, other days, I feel a bit down). At least I can admit it. lol
In any case, thanks for your honesty.
MesmerIt could just mean they are introverted and prefer to not associate with others. I'm very much introverted and as lucky as I am I have managed to make a few friends, and even then, It gets physically and mentally draining just hanging out with them.
It wouldn't be a deal breaker for me.
I can relate. I can handle one or two people but if it's a crowd, it can be emotionally drowning for me. I wish I could change that but I just don't have the correct anxiety, at least not yet.
Thanks for your opinion nonetheless.
dc0776No, it wouldn't be a deal-breaker for me.
Growing up, I was a very shy kid who had trouble making friends. I remember clearly the feelings of isolation and loneliness that I felt.
Things have changed as I've gotten older - I'm much more confident and outgoing now, with a healthy circle of friends. However, I would never pass judgement on someone for having social difficulties, having experienced it firsthand. In fact, I would probably go out of my way to make that person feel as included as possible in my social life. Ditto even if he was just a friend rather than a potential boyfriend.
On thing though - you probably will want to have an easy answer handy for the question of "why?, since it will inevitably come up.
Well that's cool. I can relate. I was much more painfully shy when I was younger. Being a little older, I'm a little more socialble but only a little. I'm just not very good in social situations but I'm working on it.
I'm happy you were able to come out of your shell more though, that's awesome.
HotJoeMy fiancé doesn't have a lot of friends, and I have quite a few friends. It's not a big deal!