Do you think my family know?

  • Onemoresummer

    Posts: 106

    May 17, 2013 3:17 PM GMT
    I know my sister knows as we used to live together so my ex would sleep over etc although we have never actually spoken about it :/

    But im 25 and haven't dated a girl since I was 19. And obviously never mention girls etc.

    Specifically talking about parents.
    I think my older sister might know from my younger one who lived me, although she has never said anything either.

    I'm starting to think it's going to be this elephant in the room forever now or something.
  • Hothouse

    Posts: 2204

    May 17, 2013 3:26 PM GMT
    They know.
    They're not gonna say anything about it until you do.
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    May 17, 2013 3:27 PM GMT
    Yes.
    My experience: They were just waiting on me to tell them.

    Sometimes they are deeper in denial than you are.

    Mom's asked me way before I was ready, yet still calls my man of 11 years, my roommate.
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    May 17, 2013 3:33 PM GMT
    Obviously they know. They just don't care.
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    May 17, 2013 3:34 PM GMT
    smartmoney saidObviously they know. They just don't care.


    Or more likely, if he doesn't talk about it they can pretend it isn't true.
  • HottJoe

    Posts: 21366

    May 17, 2013 3:34 PM GMT
    Just start acting really gay. Next time you see your dad be like, hey girl those shoes are fierce, and then be like, hey mom work that haircut!icon_lol.gif
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    May 17, 2013 3:44 PM GMT
    Hothouse saidThey know.
    They're not gonna say anything about it until you do.

    They usually so. I had a BF who told me he was convinced his mother knew, if not his father. Never married at 40, no GFs, only BFs, rather effeminate, it wasn't difficult to guess what he was. But he told me actually discussing the issue wasn't something he or his parents wanted to do, so they avoided the topic.

    I lived for a time in his house. Once his mother came in unannounced and caught us virtually in flagrante delicto. Another time he was staying at his parents own house, after I had moved away. The mother offered me a room of my own to stay overnight during my visit as it was getting late.

    Instead I said I wanted to talk with her son in his own room privately for a while, which included a sitting area. Next morning at breakfast she asked me where I had slept, since she saw the guest room was undisturbed, and I simply said "In Michael's room." There was only 1 bed in there.

    But she didn't blink an eye. At 40-something she knew her son wasn't suddenly going to marry a woman, when he had never even dated. And actually he told me he thought his mother liked our relationship, because I "butched him up" a little, made him appear less femmy. But still, sleeping in his bed in her own house must have finally removed any lingering doubt she might have had about him, and me, and our intimate relationship.
  • psycsnacha

    Posts: 161

    May 17, 2013 4:04 PM GMT
    When in the closet, I was the same way. Before coming out, I figured it was obvious to most, yet when I actually did come out to my family, it was a huge shocker for them. Huge.

    I'd say that if it's of concern for you (it is), then don't plan on throwing out subtle hints forever. Come out in your own way, but definitely come out. If they shrug their shoulders, all the better. If they're shocked, they will deal. Doing so will greatly improve the clarity of your relationship to them, even if you have to navigate a prolonged awkward readjustment period.
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    May 17, 2013 8:06 PM GMT
    psycsnacha saidWhen in the closet, I was the same way. Before coming out, I figured it was obvious to most, yet when I actually did come out to my family, it was a huge shocker for them. Huge.

    I'd say that if it's of concern for you (it is), then don't plan on throwing out subtle hints forever. Come out in your own way, but definitely come out. If they shrug their shoulders, all the better. If they're shocked, they will deal. Doing so will greatly improve the clarity of your relationship to them, even if you have to navigate a prolonged awkward readjustment period.


    this is spot on , imo
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    May 18, 2013 2:51 AM GMT
    They probably suspect. I doubt that they (your parents) know.
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    May 18, 2013 2:59 AM GMT
    Jesus 2013 and guys are still acting like this - will people "hate" me for being a bender?.

    get a grip mate.. if they dont like you move on , its a planet of 7 BILLION people not the ones who just live next door or a small family.
  • Webster666

    Posts: 9217

    May 18, 2013 3:13 AM GMT
    Hothouse saidThey know.
    They're not gonna say anything about it until you do.



    This.