How do you go about finding dates?

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 19, 2013 4:42 PM GMT
    Before you start replying "Well you go to dating sites, dummy!", I'm really talking about real life encounters that are initiated outside of cyber space. The big beef I have with online dating is that other members of the site have nothing to go on but your pictures and, through basis of faith, your description of yourself.


    I've tried going to a meet up group before, but that was insanely sexually charged (I live in DC so that's expected, I suppose). I'm thinking of going to speed dating since I honestly think it's a step up from online dating, at least you'll be able to break the ice and give the other person a chance to see a glimpse of your personality (Which will be great for me! I think my personality is a selling point, not my looks).


    So aside from speed dating and meet up groups, any suggestions on how to find potential dates? I see good looking guys on a daily basis, but I can't assume that they're gay just because they're talking to me lol.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 19, 2013 4:45 PM GMT
    Craigslist ads.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 19, 2013 4:46 PM GMT
    smartmoney saidCraigslist ads.


    That's all great and all. But craigslist is still kind online dating-ish. Plus the ads there are solely about sex. I usually go on about 10 dates before deciding to sleep with a guy.
  • calibro

    Posts: 8888

    May 19, 2013 10:27 PM GMT
    i flash cars on the highway on ramp
  • FRE0

    Posts: 4864

    May 19, 2013 10:54 PM GMT
    ComplexBread said
    smartmoney saidCraigslist ads.


    That's all great and all. But craigslist is still kind online dating-ish. Plus the ads there are solely about sex. I usually go on about 10 dates before deciding to sleep with a guy.


    Yes, most of the ads are solely about sex. Have you considered placing an ad that is not solely about sex? How about something like this?

    "Warm, friendly, affectionate, responsible, and well-educated man wants same to cuddle with and eventually, perhaps more. Meet first in a public place, for tea or dinner."

    Include a photograph of yourself dressed conservatively. Also, include interests, such as studying classical Greek, tight rope walking, or working on your Duesenberg.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 19, 2013 10:58 PM GMT
    It's dangerous work scaling the tree, but the end result is sweet deliciousness.

    palm93.GIF

    Dates1.jpg
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 19, 2013 11:03 PM GMT
    Never found a date outside of dating sites. Despite all that is bad about them, they are the best way. I guess meeting people through friends might work. Look at those two gay guys from Sex and the City, they hated each other but then they got married later on (lawl).
  • HndsmKansan

    Posts: 16311

    May 19, 2013 11:10 PM GMT
    I think it helps through friends. It's safe and the date may carry the endorsement of a a friend(s), which makes it better. I had somebody just call me on the phone and tell me they are a friend of (mutual friend) and that friend had recommended he call me. I later told our mutual friend NOT to give somebody my phone number without my approval first.
  • FRE0

    Posts: 4864

    May 19, 2013 11:14 PM GMT
    HndsmKansan saidI think it helps through friends. It's safe and the date may carry the endorsement of a a friend(s), which makes it better. I had somebody just call me on the phone and tell me they are a friend of (mutual friend) and that friend had recommended he call me. I later told our mutual friend NOT to give somebody my phone number without my approval first.


    Don't assume that dating through friends is safe. Many years ago, my sister did that and the guy tried to rape her. Fortunately, his roommate showed up and rescued her.
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    May 19, 2013 11:16 PM GMT
    calibro saidi flash cars on the highway on ramp


    The off-ramp is better...it is easier for them to slow down.

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 19, 2013 11:20 PM GMT
    http://www.realjock.com/gayforums/3201972/
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 19, 2013 11:39 PM GMT
    Get up. Do EVERYthing You can to look and feel Your best. Put on Your best clothes. and GO OUT OF THE HOUSE.

    And before anybody gives Me any crap about being shallow and vain...let Me put THIS out to You:

    None of You, NONE, would ever THINK of going to work not looking Your very best -- give Your Personal Life AT LEAST the same amount of consideration You do Your Professional.

    Most importantly READ. Know current events. Form a Point of View on something ANYTHING. Have something to SAY.

    Know what fork to use. Find Your favorite artist(s). Watch a documentary on something interesting.

    I don't know Fairfax from a hole in the wall but I seem to think it is fairly cosmopolitan with a good number of social outlets.

    Bars are great and fun but really only a SMALL part of socializing.

    Go to gallery openings - get on the list.

    Go to the theatre.

    Join a sports team.

    And don't glue Yourself to an i-device when you go out.

    Be open and a little adventurous.

    Smile at a Stranger. Give a nod to someone who holds a door for You. Shake the hand of the Restaurant owner.

    You would be surprised at the VAST opportunities that are right in front of You!!!

    Good Luck!!!

    And ENJOY the journey...

    icon_biggrin.gificon_biggrin.gificon_biggrin.gif
  • turtleneckjoc...

    Posts: 4685

    May 19, 2013 11:45 PM GMT
    calibro saidi flash cars on the highway on ramp


    But I drove by TWELVE times and you never noticed me.......
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 20, 2013 12:33 AM GMT
    calibro saidi flash cars on the highway on ramp


    That's all great and stuff. However, I run the risk of being arrest for indecent exposure. It's illegal in the state of Virginia.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 20, 2013 12:35 AM GMT
    FRE0 said
    ComplexBread said
    smartmoney saidCraigslist ads.


    That's all great and all. But craigslist is still kind online dating-ish. Plus the ads there are solely about sex. I usually go on about 10 dates before deciding to sleep with a guy.


    Yes, most of the ads are solely about sex. Have you considered placing an ad that is not solely about sex? How about something like this?

    "Warm, friendly, affectionate, responsible, and well-educated man wants same to cuddle with and eventually, perhaps more. Meet first in a public place, for tea or dinner."

    Include a photograph of yourself dressed conservatively. Also, include interests, such as studying classical Greek, tight rope walking, or working on your Duesenberg.


    Absolutely! All I got were nude photos lol.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 20, 2013 12:37 AM GMT
    TheQuest saidIt's dangerous work scaling the tree, but the end result is sweet deliciousness.

    palm93.GIF

    Dates1.jpg



    Well THOSE dates give me migraines. I'm talking about the other kind of date icon_razz.gif.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 20, 2013 12:39 AM GMT
    Ohno saidNever found a date outside of dating sites. Despite all that is bad about them, they are the best way. I guess meeting people through friends might work. Look at those two gay guys from Sex and the City, they hated each other but then they got married later on (lawl).


    I've never watched Sex and the City, but I'm in a similar situation with someone. Though, I'm not sure if we'll ever see eye to eye lol.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 20, 2013 12:40 AM GMT
    HndsmKansan saidI think it helps through friends. It's safe and the date may carry the endorsement of a a friend(s), which makes it better. I had somebody just call me on the phone and tell me they are a friend of (mutual friend) and that friend had recommended he call me. I later told our mutual friend NOT to give somebody my phone number without my approval first.


    That's not a bad idea to be honest. I'm on the gay guy I know within my circle of friends, but I'm pretty sure there's plenty out there.

    That was shitty of the mutual friend to give out your number like that. I mean it's common courtesy to ask permission first.
  • calibro

    Posts: 8888

    May 20, 2013 12:41 AM GMT
    Cash said
    calibro saidi flash cars on the highway on ramp


    The off-ramp is better...it is easier for them to slow down.



    i'm big enough that they can still see me at 65 mph
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 20, 2013 12:45 AM GMT
    ComplexBread said
    Ohno saidNever found a date outside of dating sites. Despite all that is bad about them, they are the best way. I guess meeting people through friends might work. Look at those two gay guys from Sex and the City, they hated each other but then they got married later on (lawl).


    I've never watched Sex and the City, but I'm in a similar situation with someone. Though, I'm not sure if we'll ever see eye to eye lol.


    UGH - Sex In The City is a scripted show created by people who are paid vast amounts of money to feed into the weaknesses of lemming-like creatures who feast on pop culture iconography and for SOME UNFATHOMABLE reason think it is real and attempt to base their own lives on crafted images.

    icon_evil.gificon_evil.gificon_evil.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 20, 2013 12:45 AM GMT
    Cash saidGet up. Do EVERYthing You can to look and feel Your best. Put on Your best clothes. and GO OUT OF THE HOUSE.

    And before anybody gives Me any crap about being shallow and vain...let Me put THIS out to You:

    None of You, NONE, would ever THINK of going to work not looking Your very best -- give Your Personal Life AT LEAST the same amount of consideration You do Your Professional.

    Most importantly READ. Know current events. Form a Point of View on something ANYTHING. Have something to SAY.

    Know what fork to use. Find Your favorite artist(s). Watch a documentary on something interesting.

    I don't know Fairfax from a hole in the wall but I seem to think it is fairly cosmopolitan with a good number of social outlets.

    Bars are great and fun but really only a SMALL part of socializing.

    Go to gallery openings - get on the list.

    Go to the theatre.

    Join a sports team.

    And don't glue Yourself to an i-device when you go out.

    Be open and a little adventurous.

    Smile at a Stranger. Give a nod to someone who holds a door for You. Shake the hand of the Restaurant owner.

    You would be surprised at the VAST opportunities that are right in front of You!!!

    Good Luck!!!

    And ENJOY the journey...

    icon_biggrin.gificon_biggrin.gificon_biggrin.gif


    Love it! I've never even thought of it before. I won't be doing in Fairfax, but in DC (it's 30 minutes away). There's always something going on there, and as far as dressing up, definitely room to step it up. I dress like a slob on my free time lol. I'll give it a whirl! Toughest part is not playing with my phone lol....but I'll manage.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 20, 2013 12:47 AM GMT
    calibro said
    Cash said
    calibro saidi flash cars on the highway on ramp


    The off-ramp is better...it is easier for them to slow down.



    i'm big enough that they can still see me at 65 mph


    And I suppose the Day-Glo G-string and combat boots help...

    icon_neutral.gificon_neutral.gificon_neutral.gif
  • stratavos

    Posts: 1831

    May 20, 2013 12:50 AM GMT
    ... outside of the internet and common interest groups... just meet people and make plans with others, like friends of friends.

    You've still got to be careful about appearing desperate, detached and/or controlling. Those are warning sign for people.

    edit: try the dried foods section.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 20, 2013 12:52 AM GMT
    Cash saidGet up. Do EVERYthing You can to look and feel Your best. Put on Your best clothes. and GO OUT OF THE HOUSE.

    And before anybody gives Me any crap about being shallow and vain...let Me put THIS out to You:

    None of You, NONE, would ever THINK of going to work not looking Your very best -- give Your Personal Life AT LEAST the same amount of consideration You do Your Professional.

    Most importantly READ. Know current events. Form a Point of View on something ANYTHING. Have something to SAY.

    Know what fork to use. Find Your favorite artist(s). Watch a documentary on something interesting.

    I don't know Fairfax from a hole in the wall but I seem to think it is fairly cosmopolitan with a good number of social outlets.

    Bars are great and fun but really only a SMALL part of socializing.

    Go to gallery openings - get on the list.

    Go to the theatre.

    Join a sports team.

    And don't glue Yourself to an i-device when you go out.

    Be open and a little adventurous.

    Smile at a Stranger. Give a nod to someone who holds a door for You. Shake the hand of the Restaurant owner.

    You would be surprised at the VAST opportunities that are right in front of You!!!

    Good Luck!!!

    And ENJOY the journey...

    icon_biggrin.gificon_biggrin.gificon_biggrin.gif


    Thanks Cash. I needed this reminder!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 20, 2013 12:54 AM GMT
    Cash saidI don't know Fairfax from a hole in the wall but I seem to think it is fairly cosmopolitan with a good number of social outlets.

    Not so much.