Self Image Issues/Lifting/Life

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    May 20, 2013 5:34 AM GMT
    Hey guys- This is the first post I think I have made to the Body Building section of the forum and well I have a problem. I've always had self image issues tying in with self worth issues. Keeping that in mind let's look at the progress I have made since this past summer. I have dropped like 60+ pounds from where I was at before- now in this summer I have continued to thin out some (yay for a physically demanding job) but I'm just not seeing what I want to yet- I realize I have no access to any weights so that prevents a lot of the heavy lifting which would help me but I just I crave the beauty that some of you guys have (big sexy pecs abs/no love handles etc) and I just I want to get there but I don't know how and it eats at my self esteem and worth and compounds the image issues.


    Help Please
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    May 20, 2013 2:03 PM GMT
    Stop worrying about the end result and continue to concentrate on your journey. Sounds like you've made amazing progress to date from your story above (and the impressive photos in your profile). Give yourself credit for what you've done, then you'll realize that you can get to where you want to be by getng access to the weights and other tools you need.

    Be careful though, from personal experience, I can tell you that these feelings forcing you to continue to strive for the perfect body can often never be satiated. Particularly when they stem from self esteem issues. Perfection doesn't really exist.

    Good luck!
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    May 20, 2013 2:04 PM GMT
    First of all, congrats on losing that 60 lbs, you are AWESOME!

    If you're looking to get rid of more bodyfat and the love handles, diet is really important. Have you thought about cutting down on bread, pasta, etc. and eating more healthy fats (extra virgin olive oil), more nutritious veggies (broccoli, kale, brussell sprouts).

    Bodyweight exercises can do wonders to build muscle, especially if you can make the outdoors you gym.

    I think you've made terrific progress, don't give up now! Talk with someone about the body image issue.

    Someone who knows nutrition and exercise can be a big help.



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    May 20, 2013 2:33 PM GMT
    I do have my veggies and fruits every day (yay living at home with a mother who only cooks fresh) What I eat is really what she cooks- and she is up for suggestions, but what do I do if she serves Chicken Marsala or Chicken with fresh pesto served on a bed of angel hair (two of her favourites) How do I avoid pasta then icon_razz.gif
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    May 20, 2013 2:42 PM GMT
    First of all losing sixty pounds is HUGE. That's a big deal and you should be really proud of yourself. If you don't have access to gym or home equipment you'd be surprised how much you can do with just bodyweight exercises. Do some research, there are plenty of workouts you can do. As Mileshelvetica said, diet is probably the most important thing. clean eating is huge, and having good portions of fruits, veggies,and lean protein is vital in sculpting that body.

    As for the self image part, that's a problem I still struggle with. I started out thin as a twig and I hated myself for being so weak, no matter how far I got in fitness. But once I actually took a step back to appreciate how much I'd grown and how far I'd come, it got a lot easier to have a high view of myself. A lot of times you just need to sit down and cut through the negative crap you feed yourself and try to find the source. Most of the time you'll find your fear and negative self image is rooted in nothing, and you have to cut that down and build a new image of yourself. That goes hand in hand with bodybuilding. And it's gonna be hard. Believe me, self esteem isn't something that changes overnight. There will be times when you fall back into self-loathing, you just have to learn to be able to recognize those times and combat them.
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    May 20, 2013 2:49 PM GMT
    graniteknighte saidI do have my veggies and fruits every day (yay living at home with a mother who only cooks fresh) What I eat is really what she cooks- and she is up for suggestions, but what do I do if she serves Chicken Marsala or Chicken with fresh pesto served on a bed of angel hair (two of her favourites) How do I avoid pasta then icon_razz.gif


    I would suggest cutting down on the pasta and going for more vegetables and healthy fats. If you can't cut it out completely, at least cut down.
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    May 20, 2013 2:50 PM GMT
    5alarmfucker saidFirst of all losing sixty pounds is HUGE. That's a big deal and you should be really proud of yourself. If you don't have access to gym or home equipment you'd be surprised how much you can do with just bodyweight exercises. Do some research, there are plenty of workouts you can do. As Mileshelvetica said, diet is probably the most important thing. clean eating is huge, and having good portions of fruits, veggies,and lean protein is vital in sculpting that body.

    As for the self image part, that's a problem I still struggle with. I started out thin as a twig and I hated myself for being so weak, no matter how far I got in fitness. But once I actually took a step back to appreciate how much I'd grown and how far I'd come, it got a lot easier to have a high view of myself. A lot of times you just need to sit down and cut through the negative crap you feed yourself and try to find the source. Most of the time you'll find your fear and negative self image is rooted in nothing, and you have to cut that down and build a new image of yourself. That goes hand in hand with bodybuilding. And it's gonna be hard. Believe me, self esteem isn't something that changes overnight. There will be times when you fall back into self-loathing, you just have to learn to be able to recognize those times and combat them.


    Good advice here. Remember, FEAR = False Expectations Appear Real
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    May 20, 2013 2:59 PM GMT
    If I were in your shoes ,i think it would help me greatly to remind myself this. It's okay and perfectly fine and normal to strive for a great physique, but the motivation must stem from wanting to look good, rather than wanting to look as good as others. Also try not to base too much of your self worth on your physical image as it is far to risky and our looks don't last. There loads of people with average bodies on this site, it's just that we don't post it so don't set the benchmark too high for yourself pal.
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    May 20, 2013 3:57 PM GMT
    Anyone have any advice for body weight exercises I could do that would help me?
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    May 20, 2013 4:21 PM GMT
    Pull-ups, chin-ups , dips. Push-ups with varied incline and decline.
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    May 20, 2013 7:42 PM GMT
    [quote][cite]mileshelvetica said[/cite]
    5alarmfucker saidFirst of all losing sixty pounds is HUGE. That's a big deal and you should be really proud of yourself. If you don't have access to gym or home equipment you'd be surprised how much you can do with just bodyweight exercises. Do some research, there are plenty of workouts you can do. As Mileshelvetica said, diet is probably the most important thing. clean eating is huge, and having good portions of fruits, veggies,and lean protein is vital in sculpting that body.

    As for the self image part, that's a problem I still struggle with. I started out thin as a twig and I hated myself for being so weak, no matter how far I got in fitness. But once I actually took a step back to appreciate how much I'd grown and how far I'd come, it got a lot easier to have a high view of myself. A lot of times you just need to sit down and cut through the negative crap you feed yourself and try to find the source. Most of the time you'll find your fear and negative self image is rooted in nothing, and you have to cut that down and build a new image of yourself. That goes hand in hand with bodybuilding. And it's gonna be hard. Believe me, self esteem isn't something that changes overnight. There will be times when you fall back into self-loathing, you just have to learn to be able to recognize those times and combat them.


    Good advice here. Remember, FEAR = False Expectations Appear Real

    My mind is blown lol
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    May 20, 2013 7:48 PM GMT
    graniteknighte saidI do have my veggies and fruits every day (yay living at home with a mother who only cooks fresh) What I eat is really what she cooks- and she is up for suggestions, but what do I do if she serves Chicken Marsala or Chicken with fresh pesto served on a bed of angel hair (two of her favourites) How do I avoid pasta then icon_razz.gif


    Why would you avoid pasta? It's what I just had for breakfast.

    Eat.

    There's a gazillion body weight exercise routines online. Do some of them.

    It takes CALORIES to be a stud....period.

    Keep moving. You'll be fine.
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    May 20, 2013 8:00 PM GMT
    chuckystud said
    graniteknighte saidI do have my veggies and fruits every day (yay living at home with a mother who only cooks fresh) What I eat is really what she cooks- and she is up for suggestions, but what do I do if she serves Chicken Marsala or Chicken with fresh pesto served on a bed of angel hair (two of her favourites) How do I avoid pasta then icon_razz.gif


    Why would you avoid pasta? It's what I just had for breakfast.

    Eat.

    There's a gazillion body weight exercise routines online. Do some of them.

    It takes CALORIES to be a stud....period.

    Keep moving. You'll be fine.


    I have to comment on this one, it takes calories to look like a stud, but if you end up eating too much you'll just end up gaining fat alongside the muscle.. Thus making you look bigger.

    Try and lower your bodyfat level + adding some decent sized muscle, now that'll make you a stud.
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    May 20, 2013 8:02 PM GMT
    Instead of filling me with platitudes tell me how to do it lol
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    May 20, 2013 8:06 PM GMT
    Research body weight exercises as I said. You need adequate calories to be anabolic, and to have energy to train. Calorie restriction teaches your body the famine response, and turns your body into a fat storing, lethargic, machine. You have to eat for performance, and for growth.

    There are thousands of articles on how to do this on bodybuilding.com and here.

    Learn to help yourself, and it will serve you well.

    Stand up, put on your big boy pants, and make that your mission: learning everything there is is know about what your goal is. That change of attitude will serve you well, whatever your occupation; whatever your goal.
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    May 20, 2013 8:50 PM GMT
    You need to lift heavy weights if you want muscles. Doing 50 push ups will not be enough. It can help you maintain your current physique, but it's not enough. Form follows function.

    The sooner you start the better because the process is slow. You might lose 60 lbs of body weight in months, but building 18 lbs of muscle in one year may not be doable for many people. (Google it!)

    If you don't have access to a gym, just invest in a Barbell Rack. That's all you need. Then read these 2 books: Starting Strength by Rippetoe, and 5-3-1 by Wendler.
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    May 21, 2013 4:00 AM GMT
    I've found this book very useful for body-mass maintenance.
    http://www.amazon.com/Flat-Belly-Diet-Men-Vaccariello/dp/B005FOEMIW/
    Written by the editors of "Prevention Magazine".


    (not sure what you're worried about. You had me with your face pic.)
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    May 21, 2013 4:20 AM GMT
    IMHO, a reliable source for bodyweight exercise:

    www.monkeybargym.com

    This is the website for my former gym (former only because I no longer work in Madison, WI). This gym focuses on bodyweight and kettlebell type exercises (a lot of which can be adapted to barbell/dumbells). They have a good selection of exercises, and tips on how to modify them if you don't have access to the minimal equipment suggested (you'll find most of this in the section of the site labelled 'road warrior').

    I found the routines to be quite accessible for the two years that I worked out at this gym, and fairly easy to continue now that I can no longer attend this gym.

    Your mileage may vary -- but I found the exercises and suggested routines to be quite effective. They helped me drop ~35 lbs, while gaining a lot of strength. I'm still not where I want to be, but I keep plugging away at it.
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    May 21, 2013 4:25 AM GMT
    do not even begin to worry about your body, you are 21 years old. Your body will respond to consistency in your workout routine which you obviously have a great deal of if you already lost 60 pounds, which is by no means a small feat. results will come with time and consistency of both diet and routine, you cannot worry about results right now. Worry about taking care of your body, mind and soul. Read, exercise, work, laugh, smile, go out to a party, wake up and drink water, talk with your mother about dating, see a movie. Do the things that make you happy and working out can be one of those things, but you are doing this for you not for someone else. other guys with great bodies started out in similar places as you, so just keep it up. Focus on your goals and keep motivated. You already lost a great deal of weight which clearly means you are headed in an awesome direction. give it time patience and have more self compassion, your body will change and react to the work you are giving it.