Playing nice in the sandbox....

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Oct 30, 2008 3:20 PM GMT


    ....if only we all would!

    'Technology has no concience.
    Think critically.
    Act ethically.'

    This was an ad on Canadian TV for Media awareness week and the focus was internet behaviour.

    ....having just been the recipient of hate email here, we both thought the ad timely.

    We've both observed some here that think they're both clever and wonderful in their nastiness. Others have told us that's called being a 'bitter old queen'. Hmmm. It begs the question,
    Are they like this in their relationships? Assuming they are, and that those relationships keep failing, making them into 'bitter old queens' we think there's a closed loop at work, or a vicious cycle.



  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Oct 30, 2008 4:15 PM GMT
    Aww, sorry to hear about the hate-mail, guys. As to the "bitter old queen" comment...yeah, there are undoubtedly a few of those scattered around. Reading some guys' comments, I'm really not surprised they're alone and lonely. At the same time, we shouldn't generalize...hell, we all get in those kick-the-world-in-the-fuckin-teeth bad moods when we really shouldn't be talking -- or writing -- to others, but we do nonetheless. So if somebody just says something randomly irritating, I shrug it off as a bad moment. But if it's a trend in their posting, I suspect it's something deeper. The perpetually bitterest, I suspect, are exactly as you say -- they somehow got looped into a perpetual cycle of relationship badness/bitterness, and become too consumed by it to see that so much of it is of their own construction.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Oct 30, 2008 4:35 PM GMT
    meninlove said

    ....if only we all would!

    'Technology has no concience.
    Think critically.
    Act ethically.'

    This was an ad on Canadian TV for Media awareness week and the focus was internet behaviour.

    ....having just been the recipient of hate email here, we both thought the ad timely.

    We've both observed some here that think they're both clever and wonderful in their nastiness. Others have told us that's called being a 'bitter old queen'. Hmmm. It begs the question,
    Are they like this in their relationships? Assuming they are, and that those relationships keep failing, making them into 'bitter old queens' we think there's a closed loop at work, or a vicious cycle.





    I like that ad statement. That is a mode of behaviour I have always aimed for, sometimes successfully. I think I got it from my Dad who was one of the most ethical (and least religious) people I have ever met.

    I don't know why anybody would send you hate e-mail on RJ. Nothing that I have read of your comments would seem to warrant such a reaction.

    As for "bitter old queens" well I guess there are some gay men like that, but I have also met some "bitter young queens" as well!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Oct 30, 2008 4:54 PM GMT

    ...you're probably wondering, so...
    One of the latest came from someone who told someone else on a forum to 'get lost' and then said 'we don't care' sounding like he was speaking for everyone who had posted so far, which happened to include us.

    We politely pointed out that on a public forum, everyone is entitled to speak. He didn't like that.

    There's somewhere around, what, 139,000 members here?

    So many don't post at all, and we feel some of the vitriolic behavior here could be why they hesitate. We've also noticed an epidemic of hidden/deleted profiles. This could also be why many aren't ponying up for a paid membership.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Oct 30, 2008 5:01 PM GMT
    You know, people used to irritate me regularly on RealJock, or attack people I liked, which in turn would turn loyal little me into a vociferously raging asshat that I'd be ashamed of the next day. Since coming back from vacation a couple months ago, I've been more or less over it all...I still enjoy reading and occasionally posting here, but I'm pretty much apathetic toward the dramas.

    And simply because I'm not emotionally invested, I find I enjoy my time here immeasurably more.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Oct 30, 2008 5:04 PM GMT

    "And simply because I'm not emotionally invested anymore, I find I enjoy my time here immeasurably more. "

    Sweet! Thanks. We normally would have disregarded the poster, but he spoke for us while condemning another.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Oct 30, 2008 8:57 PM GMT
    That sucks that you guys got hate mail ... WTF? You guys are the nicest couple around!
    That being said, remember that this is the internet, it doesn't work like the real world...
    Anonymity, lack of direct contact between communicators...
    Just don't take the haters seriously man, at the end of the day it's just letters on an email, the dude doesn't know either of you guys and probably never will.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Oct 30, 2008 10:07 PM GMT
    pardon me, meninlove, but you seem to be a cool guy, why are you getting hate mail? is it because you have a successful relationship and youre talented? icon_eek.gif i dont get it....i dont understand why certain people are mean for the fun of it. maybe it makes them feel better about themselves. how sad for them....
  • MikePhilPerez

    Posts: 4357

    Oct 30, 2008 10:17 PM GMT
    Sorry to hear that guys. You know you can block them?

    I haven't got one in a long time now. I must either be a very good boy or people are afraid of me icon_lol.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Oct 30, 2008 11:24 PM GMT
    Got hatemail meself. It's just the internets. icon_confused.gif Both u guys rock! You know that! icon_wink.gif

    Internet Trolls are almost always totally repulsive in person. And even if they did turn out hawt, their brain cells and that attitude would ensure they breed within the species. The kind that will hopefully go extinct as technology grows more complex. *crosses fingers* Block them for the peace of mind. icon_smile.gif

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Oct 31, 2008 12:01 AM GMT


    icon_redface.gificon_redface.gif

    ...a bit choked up. You guys! icon_redface.gif


    -us