Joeyphx444 saidThis confuses me a little when I see this in a profile
I mean I have had "fun' which I assume means sexual encounters but when I was doing that I was not lookin to date or settle down
For me at least, I do one thing at a time and focus. If I'm looking for sex that's what will happen if I am looking for a man I'll go on dates and that's it. No wonder guys can't find relationships cuz of all these mixed, vague and confusing profiles
So that means no sex on a date or while you are dating? Now you have me confused.
No, it just means he's looking for monogamy, and he's not interested in NSA hookups. It's not that one person is right and the other is wrong. More power to the players. But if you want monogamy, it's easier if you date someone who is interested in that. Weekend flings aren't the same as two people devoted to pursuing a lifelong commitment. I'm just speaking from my own experience. No judgments, honestly.
So then, what does one do when they do not have someone to date?
When I was single, I tried the separation thing. I was either going to have fun, or seek out a potential mate. What I found was that when I just went about having fun and spurned dating, I missed out. When I went about exclusively seeking a potential mate, I spent a lot of long and lonely periods of time.
However, when I blended the two I was happier; it showed. I didn't appear desperate or over analyzing potentials, and met some pretty amazing people that were outside of what I THOUGHT I wanted. I had a LOT of fun along the way, and a lot of that fun didn't involve having sex. Sometimes it did.
Oh I was sure I knew what I wanted alright.....big lol.
Casual dating opened my world to a slew of men that I'd never thought I'd spend time with and out of that arrived Bill.
My supposed type was dark hair and eyes with a swimmer's build, mysterious silent type, and an introverted person that I would encourage to open up.
Now go look at Bill's pic.
What I needed and didn't realize I wanted til I found it: a magnificent gestalt of personality and physical presence, of emotional and logical thinking all in one guy.
Wants and needs can be surprisingly different things.