FORUMS > HIV/AIDS Forum Rules

Is it important to you to know more about the person you will have sex with? Is it proper to ask questions? Should we ask questions?

If it matters .... ASK ASK ASK! If it doesn't matter, be safe and do not have any expectations so when you find out there will be no regrets.

If you think he is "The One" definately let him know why you are asking so he will understand that you are not looking to bounce.

It's life threatening so you have to be serious about safeguarding yourself, but sensitive to him if you care for him and not just the pleasure his body may have in store for you.

You should always assume the stranger you sleep with is HIV and therefore practice safer sex.

If you want to actually date that person you might like to ask them their status. -but beforehand say it doesn't matter to you(as it shouldn't...I can't understand guys who say they wouldn't date a guy whose HIV ..what's that about?)

Loz

Reality is, eventhough we may say ASK ASK ASK, I've never once had a man ask me. A lot of the times, the heat of the moment takes an effect over people, I've done all the asking, and in some cases i'm glad I did. I think people nowadays are asking more, and I would encourage them to.

The fact is, if you're not asking, you don't have anyone to blame in the end if (god forbid) something should happen. And if the person doesn't want to take the right precautions, then ask why not. I've heard the horror stories of people who don't tell people on purpose and that in it's own deserves a forum topic.

However, for the common man, asking is embarassing, and makes men nervous, mainly of the response.

Always wear a condom when you have sex w/ someone.

It is a must.

...it does matter to me...for my own health and the person I am looking at...

...and I do ask...even for a kiss...

- David

YAP THAT'S TRUE GUYS

HAVING SEX WAS FUN FUN FUN!

BUT MAKE SURE U PROTECT UR SELFD AND THE OTHER.

HAVE A SAFE SAFE SAFE SEX...

GUD MORNING EVRY1

GOD BLESS AS ALL

Ideally,I`d want to get to know the guy first,ask a few questions,check him out a bit.I ALWAYS wear a condom,and VERY wary of guys into bondage,drugs,etc.You have to consider your health and safety,there`s plenty of others who won`t!

rksportswearIs it important to you to know more about the person you will have sex with? Is it proper to ask questions? Should we ask questions?

The fact is that some people lie just to get laid. Others don't know because they don't get tested, and still others may have tested negative when they're really not, because they were tested before their bodies started making anti-bodies to the virus.

All that said, in my opinion, yes we should ask. We should ask point blank if they've been tested, when the last test was and what their status is. We should also be honest with them regarding the same info. We should exchange this kind of information with each other because not knowing can change the rest of your life, and where your life is concerned, you have the right to know, as does the man you're having sex with. Sex carries responsibilities with it. If you can have sex with him, you should be able to talk about status first.

Whether you ask or not, whether he's negative or not, condoms and safer sex practices should always... always... be used. It is much safer to assume your partner is positive and take the steps to protect each other. It might not be a 100% guarantee that you won't become infected, but outside of celibacy, its the best protection you have.

Laurence saidYou should always assume the stranger you sleep with is HIV and therefore practice safer sex.

Loz

Amen brother. But also remember guys can be doggs and will lie to get it wet. Always assume they are until you know they arent and are committed 2 you.

I'm a firm believer in getting to know someone, the idea of sharing yourself with someone, and not knowing them is a risk. However life is a risk and you've got to take some risks; everything has some risk to it and everyone is different. I think if you are going to engage in sexual activities you have to ask questions, and you have a responsibility to answer these questions honestly.

RIGuy21 saidI'm a firm believer in getting to know someone, the idea of sharing yourself with someone, and not knowing them is a risk. However life is a risk and you've got to take some risks; everything has some risk to it and everyone is different. I think if you are going to engage in sexual activities you have to ask questions, and you have a responsibility to answer these questions honestly.

Yep there you go, and as far as wearing a condom, yeah that's true but when you are in a serious relationship it shows ultimate trust to not use protection. I do however know a few guys that trusted their partner and then got aids.

Some people refuse to use condoms because the feeling isnt the same. Some people are just about getting off, so they go online to look for anyone for sex. I for one have to get to know someone before sex and we must be exclusively dating. I have messed up before,but it wont happen again.

knowing someone and loving them makes sex so much better.

all this talk of safe sex made me think while having coffee.
In most major cities pedestrians have the right of way in any crosswalk.
But... if you see a car flying towards you and you still cross the street, you are still just as dead.
Just because it's the law to stop for someone in the crosswalk doesn't mean it will happen all the time so.. it's up to you to use good judgement as to when to cross and not. Same with condom use it's up to all pedestrians to either used them or ask that they be used. If you don't... who really is to blame.

I echo many of the sentiments mentioned here.

I am not asking to spend the rest of my life with the guy- just a few brief moments- I hope I find out if we are sexually compatible, etc...down to the minute detail...

I don't like surprises...

My status is out there to the universe though- just my style...

I don't like surprises...

Deeg

Uh, yeah.

Why have sex with someone you don't even know?