15 Signs your husband might be gay

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    Jun 13, 2013 2:44 PM GMT
    This is pretty funny and, I will admit, posted by a hostile Christian group (as opposed to the sympathetic ones so let's not go on the standard rant).

    They forgot, though, the number one sign that your husband might be gay - if you're a gay man too. Ha!

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    They explain that the following is a list of “15 commonly-accepted characteristics of men struggling with homosexuality within a marriage.”

    1) Secretive late night use of cellphones and computers

    Porn addiction is closely associated with homosexuality and a secretive nature implies he’s trying to hide something from you. Be on the lookout for a man who doesn’t want to web surf or answer phone calls in your presence. Texting is another favorite trick used by adulterers. For the sake of trust, a married couple should share everything, including phone logs, email accounts, chat friends and website histories.

    2) Looks at other men in a flirtatious way

    When you’re out in public, does he spend too much time looking at other men? Is he fond of winking at people? Does he get visibly upset when someone does not return a compliment about his physical appearance?

    3) Feigning attention in church and prayer groups

    Have you noticed a lack of interest in spiritual issues? Does it ever seem as if he’s just using church as an excuse to spend time around young men? Does he volunteer to mentor in all-male groups?

    4) Overly fastidious about his appearance and the home

    Natural men have a certain amount of grit about them. They sweat and they smell. Homosexuals often abhor this sort of thing and will also be incredibly particular about the cleanliness of the home. Does your man tweeze his eyebrows, trim his pubic hairs or use face moisturizers? Is he picky about brand name shampoos? Does he spend more time getting ready for a night out than you do?

    5) Gym membership but no interest in sports

    Gay men use the gym as a place to socialize and to have secret liaisons in the bathrooms. They like to work out their bodies without the competition of sports play. Afterward, they use the showers and steam rooms to engage in sexual activity beyond the prying eyes of women. If your man returns from the gym too exhausted to talk or have sex, that is a worrisome sign.

    6) Clothes that are too tight and too “trendy”

    Gay men don’t need words to communicate their availability for sex “hook ups.” They silently broadcast the news by showing off their lean, hard bodies in designer clothing labels. If your husband owns skinny jeans and looks at his buttocks in the mirror or if he wears an inordinate number of small-sized t-shirts, it is probably worthwhile to pay more attention to his private activities.

    7) Strange sexual demands

    Fetishism is a sign that a man is seeking a harder thrill beyond the normal intimacy of heterosexual relations. The woman may not appeal to the deep desires that are coming to the surface as the marriage drags on. If there is a sudden interest in sodomy, sadomasochism, lubricants, role-play, sex toys or other non-traditional intercourse methods, this is clearly an indication of deep emotional abnormalities.

    icon_cool.gif More interested in the men than the women in pornographic films

    Pornography is a dangerous element in any marriage but there are many Christians who feel watching it does add something to their sexual lives. If you have gone down this road and find that your man perks up at the sight of the men in these sorts of videos, you should be concerned. If he selects films because of specific male actors, this is an obvious sign that he is suffering from a crisis of ego and desire.

    9) Travels frequently to big cities or Asia

    Some husbands will spend a great deal of money traveling far from home to hide their deplorable same-sex actions. Big cities offer indulgence of every kind. From gay bars and clubs to prostitutes and sex bathhouses, a man seeking encounters can find them easily if he’s so inclined. Is there ever really a good excuse for a husband to visit Thailand or San Francisco without his wife?

    10) Too many friendly young male friends

    Someone who makes an extra effort to surround themselves with younger men should raise concerns in any community. If this is the case with your husband, ask yourself if he prefers their company to that of women. Do they touch each other or embrace in long hugs? Do they exchange expensive, personal gifts like scarves or cologne?

    11) Sassy, sarcastic and ironic around his friends

    A man who is secretly engaged in homosexual activity with others may exhibit feminine qualities when they get together in a group. In a sense, he has “let his hair down” and this will be seen in excessive back talk and speaking with one’s hands.

    12) Love of pop culture

    It’s quite common for young men to enjoy the science fiction end of popular culture, but when your husband becomes overly obsessed with romantic and feminine shows, that is cause for alarm. Gossip websites, Glee and The Golden Girls are three well-documented icons of the gay movement that genuine heterosexual men avoid.

    13) Extroverted about his bare chest in public

    Does he go shirtless in the back yard or at picnics when other men are around? Does he wear a speedo at the beach? Does it seem like he’s purposely standing right in the middle of a crowd to show off his chest and arm muscles, peppering people with questions about how strong he looks? He may be craving physical affirmation from other men and desperately looking for hints of shared desires in those around him.

    14) Sudden heavy drinking

    Sometimes people dealing with an unbearable emotional issue like homosexuality will turn to alcohol to hide their distress. Does your man disappear on drinking binges for long hours without answering his cellphone? Is there a strange odor about him when he returns, some strange mix of cigarettes and gel? Does he cry frequently?

    15) Ladies, have you dated men in the past who turned out to be gay?

  • HottJoe

    Posts: 21366

    Jun 13, 2013 2:47 PM GMT
    Number one sign he's straight: pussywhipped!!!!icon_lol.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jun 13, 2013 2:57 PM GMT
    wholly crap...
    My husband is STRAIGHT!!!
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    Jun 13, 2013 4:19 PM GMT
    HottJoe saidNumber one sign he's straight: pussywhipped!!!!icon_lol.gif

    I know!
    What is it about straight men being so afraid of women?
    I've heard for so long that gay men don't like women but I'm just realizing they think that because we're not fawning all over them for sex.
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    Jun 13, 2013 4:27 PM GMT


    So Bill and I aren't gay after all? icon_lol.gif
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    Jun 13, 2013 6:54 PM GMT
    I can't believe I just read that whole post..lol Most of the straight men I know must be secretly gay according to this list....jeez.
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    Jun 13, 2013 7:09 PM GMT
    I loved the "Is he fond of winking at people?"

    I need to cultivate my winking skills.
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    Jun 13, 2013 8:53 PM GMT
    Oh bless be stereotypes !icon_lol.gif
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    Jun 13, 2013 9:39 PM GMT
    15 Signs your husband might be gay

    And...

    16) He married a lesbian to be his beard.
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    Jun 13, 2013 10:32 PM GMT
    Number 11 brings to mind a woman doing the washing up. She sees her husband chatting to some friends while starting a barbecue. Then suddenly they all snap their fingers in a triangle pattern. The woman gasps and drops a plate. It shatters EVERYWHERE.
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    Jun 14, 2013 12:14 AM GMT
    Number 5 scares me the most. Does anyone anywhere think gay sex in gym showers is common? I mean that's just F'n bizarre.
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    Jun 14, 2013 12:16 AM GMT
    lol too damn funny knowing the source.
  • The_Guruburu

    Posts: 895

    Jun 14, 2013 12:22 AM GMT
    Using lube s a sign of gayness? I can only imagine what their wives go through.
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    Jun 14, 2013 2:48 AM GMT
    JohnSpotter saidNumber 5 scares me the most. Does anyone anywhere think gay sex in gym showers is common? I mean that's just F'n bizarre.

    I first saw the acronym YCYW in the forums here, googled it and got nothing.
    Then I saw YCYL, googled that and found out it originated right here on RJ. It stands for You Cruise You Lose.
    Then I did a forum search here and found a ton(!) of threads. This thread, http://www.realjock.com/gayforums/2385274, is one user's list of his favorite RJ quotes about cruising in gym restrooms.

    So, yes, it is common.
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    Jun 14, 2013 2:54 AM GMT
    So that's why I get along so well with my straight guy friends... they are all secretly gay!! icon_biggrin.gif Yay!

    The sad thing about this list as ridiculous and hardcore stereotypical as this is, some girls are going to read it and be balling over the thought that their husband is gay.

    "You're gay aren't you?! You go to the gym and smell good and own Titanic on DVD!!!" (sniffle sniffle)

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    Jun 14, 2013 1:02 PM GMT
    Just thought of a few more to help out the ladies...

    16- Does he shout out the names of his male friends during sex?
    17- Does he make love to you with a bag over his head so he can make believe you're a guy?
    18- Does he watch old Hercules movies because the stories are so good?
    19- Does he make you wear a strap-on dildo on your forehead before you go "down there."
    20- Does he watch Popeye cartoons and root for Bluto?
  • MikeW

    Posts: 6061

    Jun 14, 2013 2:31 PM GMT
    wyrln said
    JohnSpotter saidNumber 5 scares me the most. Does anyone anywhere think gay sex in gym showers is common? I mean that's just F'n bizarre.

    I first saw the acronym YCYW in the forums here, googled it and got nothing.
    Then I saw YCYL, googled that and found out it originated right here on RJ. It stands for You Cruise You Lose.
    Then I did a forum search here and found a ton(!) of threads. This thread, http://www.realjock.com/gayforums/2385274, is one user's list of his favorite RJ quotes about cruising in gym restrooms.

    So, yes, it is common.

    BUT the majority of those quotes are reflecting the DISAPPROVAL of using gyms to cruise.

    This opens up a whole question I've been mulling over and still haven't found a way to word it that makes sense. When I do, I want to start a thread on it.

    The question has to do with the consequences of sexual oppression. Take something pleasurable and make it socially unacceptable and what happens? But I'm still mulling this over.
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    Jun 14, 2013 2:47 PM GMT
    Fifteen? It used to be ten. I blame metrosexuality.
  • PR_GMR

    Posts: 3831

    Jun 14, 2013 2:49 PM GMT
    16. Your husband is Claystation.
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    Jun 14, 2013 5:40 PM GMT
    JohnSpotter saidJust thought of a few more to help out the ladies...

    16- Does he shout out the names of his male friends during sex?
    17- Does he make love to you with a bag over his head so he can make believe you're a guy?
    18- Does he watch old Hercules movies because the stories are so good?
    19- Does he make you wear a strap-on dildo on your forehead before you go "down there."
    20- Does he watch Popeye cartoons and root for Bluto?


    I do think Bluto is pretty hot actually.

    images?q=tbn:ANd9GcSb7yKQBPjBOU1wG374BAc
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    Jun 15, 2013 1:28 PM GMT
    Oh so true. I'm wild about Bluto and this cartoon gave me a boner. Those cartoonists had to be gay.

    Popeye-and-bluto-2.jpg

    Also, George of the Jungle was nothing to be sneezed at.

    600full-george-of-the-jungle-artwork.jpg.

    Roger Ramjet came in third.

    roger_ramjet_by_slart.png

    The METRO MAN designers had to be gay too. Ho-boy!

    megamind-metro-man-image.jpg
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    Jun 15, 2013 8:58 PM GMT
    Apparently adultery and vanity are now ok with this christian group because most items on the list could apply to them. But no. Gay is the big evil.
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    Jun 15, 2013 9:09 PM GMT
    JohnSpotter saidNumber 5 scares me the most. Does anyone anywhere think gay sex in gym showers is common? I mean that's just F'n bizarre.

    I've had sex in YMCA & college showers, so I guess it happens. How common I dunno.

    Shower sex is actually one of my fantasies & turn-ons, I assume because of all the years of being sexually repressed in school & military showers. But normally I confine it to gay bathhouses and guest houses, a very rare occasion when I do it in a non-gay setting.
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    Jun 15, 2013 9:33 PM GMT
    ART_DECO said
    JohnSpotter saidNumber 5 scares me the most. Does anyone anywhere think gay sex in gym showers is common? I mean that's just F'n bizarre.

    I've had sex in YMCA & college showers, so I guess it happens. How common I dunno.

    Shower sex is actually one of my fantasies & turn-ons, I assume because of all the years of being sexually repressed in school & military showers. But normally I confine it to gay bathhouses and guest houses, a very rare occasion when I do it in a non-gay setting.


    I always hate the idea of sex in the shower because of how obvious my hair loss is when it's wet. Vanity trumps fun icon_lol.gif
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    Jun 18, 2013 9:32 PM GMT
    Just thought of another one...
    21 - Does he watch all pro wrestling?
    I mean, seriously, why do straight men watch that?