Since JMUSMC85 is OBVIOUSLY MADLY in Love with Me..I am just going to make up stupid stories about Our exploits...

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jun 15, 2013 8:30 PM GMT
    So this one time JM picks Me up in His rented Chevy Nova and I am all like ...JM...this car SUCKS.

    SO He gives Me a sip of Bailey's and say's "let THAT sink in BABE... Car starts looking REAL good now...."

    They found My pants floating in the Matedeconk River and Me TOTALLY shaved at the Snuggly Bear Lodge next to the Teterboro Airport...


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    Jun 15, 2013 8:45 PM GMT
    So this ONE time JM takes Me to the Massage Motel for a weekend of "sweet nothings"


    Turns out I had to pay and He spent the weekend with a Guy named "JACKSON' in a rented Corvaire....
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    Jun 15, 2013 9:05 PM GMT
    So it's a Tuesday...

    JM rents a Cadillac and pulls up with a BIG grin and a Ham..


    WELL

    I'M in

    The Ham was under-cooked but JM didn't wear underwear and His package was CLEARLY visable thru the Nylon Shorts.....

    OH Happy Day!!!!!!!!


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    Jun 15, 2013 9:17 PM GMT
    Mmm did somebody say

    tumblr_lt3332IWQq1qf4ea2o1_500.gif

    ??????

    icon_lol.gif
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    Jun 15, 2013 9:21 PM GMT
    BlackCat90 saidMmm did somebody say

    tumblr_lt3332IWQq1qf4ea2o1_500.gif

    ??????

    icon_lol.gif


    LOL!

    How come you never talk about our lover exploits Cash? Was I just a cheap tramp to you?

    And I thought we were special.
  • PR_GMR

    Posts: 3831

    Jun 15, 2013 10:21 PM GMT
    I approve of this thread! More Cash and Jmusc exploits, please.
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    Jun 15, 2013 11:51 PM GMT
    So I'm sitting around waiting for gifts.

    It was a Thursday.

    SO

    JM walks in with a box.

    He was also COMPLETELY nude.

    I kinda ignored the box....

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    Jun 15, 2013 11:58 PM GMT
    So this one time JM takes Me to the Park to walk the Dog.

    I am all Like JM...We ain't got a Dog...

    He looks Me dead in the eye and says Look at THIS "tail" wag Baby.....

    We didn't get home 'till 3AM.....
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    Jun 16, 2013 12:03 AM GMT
    So JM comes home one day and takes all His clothes off.

    I am in a snit because the Maid quit and NOW who is supposed to answer the door????

    Me???????

    Then I noticed JM was completely naked....

    I hired a Guy named Juan to answer the door and called it a day......
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    Jun 16, 2013 12:08 AM GMT
    So JM stops by one afternoon and says "You are like a God to Me...PLEASE tell Me You Love Me and let Me be Your slave..."

    I coughed on a Cracker Jack and said "What?"

    Hellen the Maid brought Me a Fudgcicle and We all watched Bullwinkle.

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    Jun 16, 2013 12:19 AM GMT
    So JM buys Me a Ruby and then wants "pleasure" in return.

    I was all LIKE EMERALDS Please....

    We sent out for burgers and fired Hellen the Maid...I NEVER really liked Her.

    We kept Juan to answer the door though...

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    Jun 16, 2013 12:30 AM GMT
    So one night JM goes out to shoot pool with the Mafia.

    It was just Me and Juan when the doorbell rings and Juan answers it.

    The IRS.

    So naturally I drop My robe.

    DUDE has the NERVE to say "that's very impressive for a Man of Your age but You STILL gotta PAY."

    In AMERICA????


    WHO PAYS???

    When You got ABS like THESE??????

    Juan made Maurgaritas and We called the Lawyer and just got really drunk.

    The IRS Guy did nude karaoke and we LAUGHED.....
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    Jun 16, 2013 12:39 AM GMT
    So one night JM and I are there reading the Wall Street Journal and discussing the latest exploits of Arriana Huffington when Juan walks in and says "Some Guy I don't recognize is here. Hope He doesn't kill You. Good night."

    The AWKWARDNESS of being COMPLETELY nude and having nothing to serve after the help retired for the evening....
  • Timbales

    Posts: 13993

    Jun 16, 2013 12:47 AM GMT
    I remember the time Cash slapped my face and screamed "I SAID NO GREEN SKITTLES!"
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    Jun 16, 2013 1:27 AM GMT
    This thread needs pics. It really, really needs pics!
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    Jun 16, 2013 1:28 AM GMT
    I'm actually a 45 year old virgin and have been using jmusmc85's pics from his Facebook account.

    Sorry to mislead all of you...

    But my humor is real!!! Isn't that what matters? Right moonhawk?
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    Jun 16, 2013 1:29 AM GMT
    Timbales saidI remember the time Cash slapped my face and screamed "I SAID NO GREEN SKITTLES!"


    If that's all you got for making the mistake of leaving in green Skittles you got off lucky.

    You got off very lucky.
  • AMoonHawk

    Posts: 11406

    Jun 16, 2013 1:37 AM GMT
    jmusmc85 saidI'm actually a 45 year old virgin and have been using jmusmc85's pics from his Facebook account.

    Sorry to mislead all of you...

    But my humor is real!!! Isn't that what matters? Right moonhawk?

    I'm not sure, I think maybe you stole that humor too ... I'm pretty sure I saw it on twitter. icon_evil.gif
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    Jun 16, 2013 6:09 AM GMT
    Timbales saidI remember the time Cash slapped my face and screamed "I SAID NO GREEN SKITTLES!"


    That time at the movies???


    AHHAHHA...


    We were so Young...

    Happy times...Good times....

    I miss Esther Rolle....
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    Jun 16, 2013 6:23 AM GMT
    So this one time JM and I are on the run from the Law.

    We rent a house in the Hills from some Guy named DAYTONA DAVE.

    Not a bad house -- sort of Hollywood Regency with a slant toward Roccocco...

    So JM sets up a shooting range / Gym in the Solarium and tells ME to throw a fancy dinner party for a bunch of Japanese bankers.

    So there I am making crab cakes with Juan and Soji Ikumori walks in and asks about the Picasso book on the coffee table in the Library.

    Jaun just put down His Stella Artois and was like "is this bitch for real????"




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    Jun 16, 2013 6:36 AM GMT
    So this one night JM is singing a VERY nice Verdi Aria - which I was enjoying because Our Butler Juan plays a MEAN piana...

    WELL

    Next thing I know the C.I.A comes crashing through My Dining room windas with guns drawn and FILTHY boots...And I JUST had the drapes cleaned...

    Can You IMAGINE?????
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    Jun 16, 2013 6:42 AM GMT
    So there We were.

    JM, Me and Juan Our Butler.


    The money was GONE.

    All We had left was My Jewelry and Zsa Zsa Gabor's shoes.

    Oh SURE Juan was LOYAL and was willing to fight ANY Dude in a bar...and JM could still dance nude for the Police...

    But We needed REAL Money...
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    Jun 16, 2013 6:45 AM GMT
    Honey, have you been mixing the Skittles with Wild Turkey again?

    Remember what happened to Judy!

    jaja!
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    Jun 16, 2013 7:19 AM GMT
    GAMRican saidHoney, have you been mixing the Skittles with Wild Turkey again?

    Remember what happened to Judy!

    jaja!


    That was YOUR recipe!!!!!!!
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    Jun 16, 2013 7:22 AM GMT
    I will seriously dump any man that gives me Skittles with green apple in them.

    I was totally bummed the other week when I had to eat Skittles with green apple ones....bring back LIME!! icon_mad.gif