My feelings for my friend have changed i've fallen for him.

  • the_one_

    Posts: 12

    Jun 17, 2013 10:14 AM GMT
    I've known my friend for over 7 months he is also gay. We first met some many years ago at a party and exchanged a kiss. Years later we have got back in contact and i'm so happy that we did. We spend so much time together , going for lunch , dinners , movies weekend breaks and just talk and enjoy each-other. Time has passed and were still doing all the above , he's so playful with me and I am too.

    My feelings have changed towards him.I can't keep my feelings inside me any longer yet I'm still afraid to let him know that for me what started out as friendship, has grown stronger. I only wish I had the strength to let it show
    I tell myself that I can't hold out forever.

    I got upset in-front of him and he was so sweet and caring and he worried about me , but at that point I really could not bring my self to tell him the truth and i know that i should cause I don't want to regret not having have told him and never truly knowing.

    When is the right time too tell your friend that you want them .

  • MikeW

    Posts: 6061

    Jun 17, 2013 3:27 PM GMT
    Broseph saidAlso, Reo Speedwagon happened.

    Seriously.

    OP, don't 'tell' him, show him. Take him out on a date he'll never forget.
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    Jun 17, 2013 4:51 PM GMT
    MikeW said
    Broseph saidAlso, Reo Speedwagon happened.

    Seriously.

    OP, don't 'tell' him, show him. Take him out on a date he'll never forget.


    It you are reluctant to communicate the simplest of feelings it's a sign you are not ready to date or have a relationship.
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    Jun 17, 2013 10:22 PM GMT
    dear, diary...
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    Jun 17, 2013 11:18 PM GMT
    Try and find out what sort of guys he likes, if he has his eye on anyone etc. if he is a little bit drunk (not too drunk) all the better, he will be more honest.

    Whatever you do, please give us an update, thank you icon_biggrin.gif
  • waccamatt

    Posts: 1918

    Jun 18, 2013 1:46 AM GMT
    About 33% of the time this is post number one on RJ.
  • heyom

    Posts: 389

    Jun 18, 2013 3:18 AM GMT
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    Jun 18, 2013 3:57 AM GMT
    This has never happened to me. If I was ever attracted to a guy on initial sight, I made an unconscious decision about my intentions. Now, of course I am much more aware of my initial responses to other men.

    Seven months sounds like a great start for a real relationship. If you are really ready for this, you will be willing to take a chance on losing your friendship as you know it. Seriously. If it doesn't work out, your friendship will never be the same, though I'm not saying that it would necessarily END. Love? I wonder if you are there or not.

    Just make a decision and act.
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    Jun 18, 2013 4:44 AM GMT
    Now icon_smile.gif
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    Jun 18, 2013 5:11 AM GMT
    The fact that your this nervous and worried is a sign that you already know he's not into you. Just relax and go with the motion.
  • the_one_

    Posts: 12

    Jun 18, 2013 7:54 AM GMT
    heyom said


    Hahaa thanks that made my morning lol


    Guy's I'm not worried that he doesn't like me , I'm sure he does from what I can see. I guess i'm just being an idiot about it by being such a pussy. I just don't know where too tell him , how to tell him , I have it all ready in my head and just need to bite the bullet and come out with it. Do you do this stuff over a drink , dinner , over the phone? Agh ..... lol

  • TheBigB79

    Posts: 40

    Jun 18, 2013 2:15 PM GMT
    If you're fairly sure he likes you, then just tell him. It doesn't have to be some big to do. Gay men seem so reluctant to put themselves out there even just a little bit because of the chance they might get hurt. There's not enough open and honest communication anymore.
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    Jun 18, 2013 3:12 PM GMT
    Benjamin_boy said


    Guy's I'm not worried that he doesn't like me , I'm sure he does from what I can see. I guess i'm just being an idiot about it by being such a pussy. I just don't know where too tell him , how to tell him , I have it all ready in my head and just need to bite the bullet and come out with it. Do you do this stuff over a drink , dinner , over the phone? Agh ..... lol



    NOT the phone. You tell him while you guys are sharing a great moment doing something you both love to do. Just randomly in the middle of that.
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    Jun 18, 2013 4:20 PM GMT
    Yes, you want him
    Look at him, you know you do
    It’s possible he wants you, too
    There is one way to ask him
    It don’t take a word
    Not a single word
    Go on and kiss the guy

    Sha-la-la-la-la-la
    My, oh, my
    Look at the boy too shy,
    He ain’t gonna kiss the guy!

    icon_biggrin.gif
  • the_one_

    Posts: 12

    Jun 19, 2013 9:11 AM GMT
    Good morning guys, Hope you all slept well icon_smile.gif Well finally met up with my best friend , had a good chat over some yummy wine. He told me a story of when he fell for his friend but never said a word about to him and then the guy met someone down the line. My friend was then told by this guys friend that the guy he was in love with felt the same about him .... but time had passed for anything to then happen leaving my friend heartbroken.

    I'm not going to let that happen , no regrets. I'm going to just do it no matter what the outcome cause I know two things can be..... He will feel the same and we will move on to a new chapter that would be so amazing , or we will remain in the fantastic friendship and I will just have to move on with it as hard as it maybe.

    Anyway guys, have a wonderful day or night ! ;)


    He just sent me this song this morning , agh !!!

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    Jun 19, 2013 9:22 AM GMT
    the best of luck to you man! I, too fell for my best friend whom we've done "stuff" and when I told him that I had a thing for him, it was sadly only a one way feeling. It was hard to get over it especially when he was looking for someone else to which he did fall for. It was hard, but supported it even when it was tearing me apart. Needless to say, we're still best friends. So whatever happens, remember to support him even if he doesn't have the same feelings towards you and support him when he finds his Mr. Right. Best of luck man!