Remembrance and dealing with issues.

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    Jun 23, 2013 6:26 AM GMT
    I feel like I should reach out for help tonight...

    Tonight I was with a group of friends celebrating a "going away party" when a few people had brought up cancer/deceased people for what ever reason... I really don't know why it was brought up. All I remember is that I started to cry, cry for my sister that I had lost 12 years ago due to liver cancer. I couldn't stop crying and even texted/called someone from my previous college to come an pick me up (even though she was out of town) who had been there for me in the past.

    I ended up calling my mother who understood what I was going through and picked me up with no questions asked.

    I'm just wondering if anyone has ever experienced a rush of emotion like this. I literally could not stop crying for the whole night. Part of me felt good that I was sharing with with friends and family but the other part of me thought that no one would understand what I was going through during the break down.

    I wish I could understand what had happened, but until then, I'll just sleep and ponder why the world works like it does.

    Thanks for listening everyone. I really do appreciate it.
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    Jun 23, 2013 11:20 AM GMT
    Im sure others can relate I know I can. I had a friend kill himself 13 years ago and no one knows why he did it. So off an on for years I'd just randomly think about him and be upset for a bit. It's been a while since this has happened and I suspect 13 years has " been long enough" for me to be " over it" in all forms. However, to each there own and I'm sure your situation is harder being a family member and them not " self inflicting" their death. All in all I would say you are normal. icon_smile.gif
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    Jul 07, 2013 3:53 AM GMT
    I have had a similar experience recently. A group of friends I go to college with were hanging out at my place. One of them broke the news that his parents were getting a divorce and so divorce became a topic of conversation. My parents aren't divorced, but they have not seen or spoken to each other since I was 13 (I'm currently 22). After telling my friend I'm sorry, I walked into my room and began crying hysterically.
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    Jul 07, 2013 5:05 AM GMT
    From my own experience, feelings of loss which stem from those who have passed before us are natural. It is a signal that we love them and that we miss them. Crying is a natural response to these feelings and can be cathartic. We can come through the cry feeling lighter, freer, and with less burden.

    I've found that at some point in the catharsis, I know that it is time for me to return to living joyfully, because I believe that those who have passed before me would want for me to be happy when I think of them and to not dwell in sadness. It is for these people that I then go do something joyful, vibrant, and alive...while thinking of them. I do it "with" them, and "for" them.

    Taking this concept further, I've communicated with family and close friends that if I pass before them, that I want a PARTY at my memorial. I want it to be a CELEBRATION of LIFE. I want the last gathering in my name to be a positive, memorable experience that will bring a smile to their faces for the rest of their lives. I've told all of these people that I want them to continue to live on in joy in my memory.

    They tell me, "but you're not going anywhere". I respond, "But any of us may at any moment. So, let's enjoy what time we have right in the now." Good times usually follow.